No, it does not have such a slot. It can connect via Wi-Fi or RJ-45 wired (and dial-up, with appropriate external modem; if interested in this, see my review for particulars) but, as far as I know, these are the only means of connection.
I presume that a datacard is a peripheral which allows connection via a cell-phone network. (Please correct me if I'm wrong.) As of this time, this Asus model does not offer that capability but I would not be surprised to see it incorporated in the very near future.
This particular netbook computer DOES have built-in BlueTooth capability (unusual in this class I understand) but I do not know if one could connect to the internet using that. My cell-phone is a pre-paid one as I rarely need or want to use such a device so I am unfamiliar with the capabilities of connection to the internet via cell-phones' BlueTooth transmissions. Perhaps someone else reading this, someone more familiar with this, can comment.
As far as "stupid questions" go, I learned a long time ago that the only "stupid question" is the one that's not asked! (Your question is not stupid at all!)
Nearly every modern version of linux, including those on the eeepc, aspire one, etc, comes with a fully graphical user interface and a full office suite which is compatible with MS office files (including excel).
From wikipedia (eee pc article):
"The base Linux system boots in 20-22 seconds, substantially faster than the boot time for an installation of Windows XP on the same hardware On top of this, the Eee PC runs a custom tab-based interface and uses IceWM as the default window manager.
Forty bundled software applications include OpenOffice.org, Mozilla Firefox, Skype, Tux Paint and other educational entertainment software, E-mail, and Internet radio applications, Google Docs and Wikipedia look-up tool."
Check out this article from computerworld for a good rundown of the advantages of the linux-based eeepc 1000:
If you connect an external display, you can have the desktop display on either or both, and in higher resolution when displaying only on the external display. You can't however (so far as I've seen), have the two displays both on at once and showing different parts of a desktop as on a PC or Mac.
If you ordered a White one, you're likely still waiting. I switched my order to a Black one late last week, and it arrived Tuesday. The black one has been both out of stock and back in stock since. I didn't cancel my order for the White case until the Black case version arrived and worked. I also called Amazon first to confirm the White one wouldn't be along in a day or two.
yeah the difference is the solid state drive which the linux version uses. They are much more expensive then normal drives, however they load faster and do not have any moving parts so that makes them safer if you were to drop your laptop and such. They also save some on battery life.