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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
The SNORE-INATOR,
By A Customer
This review is from: 13th Child: Legend of the Jersey Devil (DVD)
Despite the fact that it has some really good actors this film is just so BAD.The JERSEY DEVIL monster only looks disturbing in literally the last two minutes of the film when it rises out of a pool of blood. Throughout the rest of the film it resembles a man in a bad monster suit (ripped off from the GIGER ALIEN design yet again). This film PLODS on and the minor characters are all more entertaining and interesting than the main ones. Specifically the female investigator. She is like an unnattrative NAOMI WATTS blonde (with a really hideous personality) crossed with DANA SCULLY. So basically you have someone who you can feel no empathy with and literally can't stand. The evil Mr. Shroud who somehow is linked to the JERSEY DEVIL through some kind of ancestral silliness walks around through the film grumbling and mumblings lines like, "Have you seen my friend Bruno?" (Bruno being his pet name for his fake looking Jersey Devil pal). I have seen worse films but not by much. The idea was cool and the image of the JERSEY DEVIL rising from the pool of blood is quite well done. But sitting throught the entire movie to see the ONLY good part is NOT something I could recommend to anyone else.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Mowing lawn might be more entertaining.....,
By
This review is from: 13th Child: Legend of the Jersey Devil (DVD)
I know there is a hockey team in Jersey called the Devils and this movie put anything associated with the word Jersey and Devils to shame. What were the film makers doing by discrediting the infamous JD Lore by not even getting the history correct....not even close. Worse yet is that they decide to not put any effort in any aspect of trying to make a good movie out of this regardless of the history. Why i wonder? ...is it to tick off the viewers or the whole lore or what.
Maybe they purposely make this movie bad to see if the saying '..its soo bad that its good' would apply but it failed miserable as well since it needs that cheesy gore that we all love. I doubt if they are capable of doing that. It is just bad no matter how much you try to find something good about this movie. Is this even called a movie? Seems like bits and pieces of nonsense...in other words its garbage. What's up with the special effects anyways. I seen better effects watching Gumby. At least you see the monster in the end...like whoopie doo soo scary i'm gonna scream now. Give me a break...its not even worth the effort to fake being scared imo. Do yourself a favor and mow the lawn instead....it might be more entertaining.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
The Demon's revenge...,
By Draconis Blackthorne (The Haunted Noctuary) - See all my reviews
This review is from: 13th Child: Legend of the Jersey Devil (DVD)
Briefly, the legend of The Jersey Devil is quite an interesting one, going back some 260 years. A demonic entity supposedly appears before some impending disaster to unsuspecting folk in the enchanted pine barrens area of New Jersey. Its origins stem from a mother who cursed her child by proclaiming that The Devil could take it - in consequence, a devilish child with horns, wings, tail, and cloven hooves issued from her loins and took to flight, thus beginning this urban legend. There are several other variations, including a really interesting one about its mother being a witch, and The Devil, its father. Older pIctures drawn by purported 'witnesses' describe a very Baphomet-looking creature, as well as a sort of horse-demon synthesis.
The Pine Barrens are a natural environment overgrown with wonderful foliage, swamps, and residences transcending modern civilation. Such wildly lush locations tend to breed folktales because of these seeming opposing conditions to the 'big city', thus rendering them intriguing and mysterious places, as well as the residents themselves propagating continual superstition. In this cinematic adaptation, an investigator named "Kathryn" {Michelle Maryk} is assigned to follow up the apparent murder of a redneck hunter who just so happened to be listening to a decidedly "Coast to Coast"-sounding program on the radio, before being attacked by a red-eyed creature, apparently attracted by the carcass of a deer hooked onto his truck, which was to be the hick's dinner. Apparently, he became the main course! Kathryn meets up with a law-enforcement acquaintance {although a more personal relationship is suggested}, subsequently finding a large black 'tooth', along with the mutilated torso of the hunter, and take it to be examined at the Coroner's office - predictably, it turns out that there is no matching DNA with the relic, but instead seems to be a composit of a goat's, bat's, and something else they cannot identify. She eventually meets with a "Mr. Shroud" {Cliff Robertson} - a charming and enigmatic gentleman with many remarkable de-facto Satanic qualities, from his appearence, demeanor, to even his total environment. He graciously offers her a stay for the night, and over pleasant dinner conversation, reveals his agreeable misanthropy. During the course of the investigation, Mr. Shroud's deadly 'secret' is discovered, but even through some difficulty, manages to preserve his Magical and timeless existence. As a humorous aside, a scene wherein a bumpkin couple drive around seeking a spot to copulate, find an abandoned trailer in the woods, where they are frightened by some hillbillies, and are sent scampering back to the car, eventually being stopped by the Police in a half-naked hysteria. In a seemingly gratuitous element of the plot, a mental patient named 'Riley' {Robert Guillaume} recounts his experience with The Jersey Devil, and holds onto a talisman to protect him and keep him alive. His eventual misbehavior lands him in solitary confinement where he eventually receives a visit from the creature, who takes his due. On a visual basis, I did like the appearence of the Jersey Devil monster itself, very demonic with horns, wings, hooves, and Giger-like alieneque jaws. The 13th Child is a dramatic take on the urban legend, incorperating some blood and gore similar to 'Jeepers Creepers', although there are no accounts of The Jersey Devil actually killing anyone, so astistic license was taken for this presentation. Also on the DVD, deleted scenes, previews, and a documentary of this 'Demon of the Pine Barrens".
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