Customer Reviews

The 2009-2014 Outlook for Wood Toilet Seats in Greater China

5 star:		(4)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(5)

 

 

This is so weird. My husband and I were just discussing the 2009-2014 outlook for wood toilet seats in greater China the other day. Now today, here I am surfing Amazon and wouldn't you know it? The 2009-2014 outlook for wood toilet seats in greater China. I am so happy the price seems reasonable. I'm thinking Amazing Anniversary Present!!!!!!

I was thinking, "Sweet! Finally a version of Outlook that will run on my wooden Chinese toilet seats!!" Little did I know this has **NOTHING** to do with Outlook for Windows or any other MicroSoft product. It is NOT a five-year wooden-toilet email/calendar software product, but is in fact some kind of WELL-DONE REPORT ON TOILET SEATS!! By coincidence still entirely useful to me in my line of business but now I will have to find some other way to coordinate my inter-seat schedules and emails!! Buyer beware!!

And as hypnotic as the I Ching!

This extraordinary analysis, panoramic in scale and of far reaching magnitude, is now finally available to the reader in two significantly useful and highly desirable formats: PDF e-download and paperback, 141 pages (Both $495.00,in stock and available with one click ordering).

A current blockbuster best seller and a classic in the making, this analysis is beloved by children as well as adults, scholars as well as arm chair travelers, the constipated as well as those who are decidedly not, and even those who can move their bowels regularly.

In fact, like many great writings, "The 2009-2014 Outlook for Wood Toilet Seats in Greater China" can be appreciated on multiple levels....cultural, political, historic, dramatic, poetic, educational, satiric, humorous and even just plain goofy fun.

Starting with the eternal premise that "The concept of latent demand is rather subtle" the hypnotic story line evolves outward, captivating and fascinating the reader. Soon an overlay of the Eastern philosophical tenet "The average propensity to consume is constant" is introduced and as you can well imagine, all hell breaks loose!

In the end, despite coming to the ultimate and often life altering knowledge that "Product and service offerings, and the actual identity of the players involved, while important for certain issues, are relatively unimportant for estimates of latent demand", and "....in the long run, households with no income eventually have no consumption", the reader comes to fundamentally understand that the true nature, the very essence of humankind will, whatever the circumstance, choose a toilet seat over a hole in the ground nine times out of ten.

This report makes an excellent compendium to the recently published, and 44 years in the making, Historical Thesaurus of the Oxford English Dictionary (Historical Thesaurus of the Oxford English Dictionary: With Additional Material from A Thesaurus of Old English). Combined, the two tomes provide hours of wholesome fun especially for those who love to incorporate words such as "cyclicalities" and "exogenous" into everyday conversation or even just while texting BFFs.

Although not inexpensive, this report is extremely economical if downloaded in PDF format and printed on a continuous roll of toilet paper. It would then be "pay as you go" and quite affordable.

A minor complaint is that the report is not yet offered in Kindle format (Are you listening Amazon?). One can always look forward to that happy day!

NEWS FLASH!!!!! Just made available to Amazon customers, is the ultimate Toilet Seat Report experience: The 2007-2012 World Outlook for Wood Toilet Seats. Detailed research results is given for over 200 countries!!!! At $795 its worth every penny! A must for the world traveler!

NEWS FLASH FLASH!!!!! If you have been mesmerized by the character development in the two previously published works, be sure to read the just released prequel, The 2007-2012 Outlook for Wood Toilet Seats in Greater China The 2007-2012 Outlook for Wood Toilet Seats in Greater China. It is here that Philip Parker unrolls the dramatic events of the early life of the little humble peasant boy WingSit, the noble but driven hero of the series. What motivated WinSit to overcome the brutal hardships of his early years to become the world's greatest wood toilet seat carver? Surely the suffering imposed by his brutal wet nurse GoGoMe caused WingSit's stuttering and facial ticks but it is not until the mid point in this work does the reader learn of the scars to his chest and back and deep psychic damage suffered during enforced dodge ball tournaments in kindergarten. One of the most loved and memorable characters in the two previous works is WongBo the aged and sage Master Teacher of toilet seat carving who WingSit loves yet competes with and ultimately surpasses. In heart rending detail, Parker describes how little, stuttering WingSit is found wandering the narrow streets and lifted out of the squalor by the 25 year old WongBo then just setting out on his own as a journeyman toilet seat carver. I don't want to give away too much of the plot line. It is mesmerizing! One complaint is that the characters of Arabella the sexy statistician and Jeremiah the ardent social scientist are not introduced here. Perhaps there is another prequel in the works?

As a result of this document, I have purchased over 4 acres of prime masonite woodland. I expect to recoup my money in under three months!

I picked this up off Amazon with little or no knowledge of the Chinese situation. It was all just a black hole to me. But, I must say that after a constipated start, I was riveted. Seeing the transformation of Xiao Ling through adolescence and the turmoil accompanying his parent's gastrointestinal issues until his later redemption at the ministry of lavoratory accessories was really moving to me. In fact, I don't see how anyone can read this and not be moved deeply and viscerally. I will admit there were parts that I strained to get through. There were other times that I wanted to gush over what was going on; flush with the excitement.

There was also a very nuanced sexuality that infuses the book. Stroke after stroke of the writer's pen really paid off in the climactic scene. The iconic imagery of Chairman Mao invoked by the village ejaculating his name over and over could not help but overwhelm a reader, though a few minutes after one might be lulled into a sleepily languid state by the diminishing rhythm of pace in the story.

I must say that I was not equally enchanted with the movie version of this. While I normally like Samuel L. Jackson, I just did not think he was able to pull off Mei-Zhen, Xiao's older sister. Also, some of the funnier moments in the written version just did not come through on screen. I will add that the sequel to this "The Chinese Wood Toilet Seat that Kicked the Hornet's Nest" was not anywhere near the caliber and of the seminal first work.

Overall, I would highly recommend this. Don't listen to the "haters" of wood toilet seats out there. This one is a keeper!

The name pretty much says it all. I keep it as my bathroom reading companion much to the chagrin of my girlfriend, who thinks I spend way too much time in there.

I'm not going to say this is not an important work because any five year outlook on wood toilet seats is going to be a valuable information guide for toilet seat speculators worldwide. My issue is the focus on China. Yes, China has a billion or so people, so nature says they will probably use the toilet seats more than most countries, but where is my guide to wood toilet seats in South America?

If we are going to have one guide, we really need to have guides to other regions of the world. South America is a booming market for wood toilet seats since we are finally getting around to cutting down the amazon forest. I, like most people, have run my own numbers on wood toilet seats, but like any researcher, I want to know what the rest of the wood toilet seat scientific community thinks of my work. Right now, I feel like a lone wolf trying to run numbers on Peru while everyone is focused on only China. I don't even know how much China cares as I have heard they are implementing government mandated cuts on wood toilet seat research funding. I have yet to hear Yao Ming or Wang Zhi Zhi weigh in on the subject.

I have a good friend from Brazil that I go to lunch with periodically and it never fails that the subject of wood toilet seats in her country comes up. In her mind, this ranks right behind soccer in terms of human interest. Maybe having the olympics there in a few years will bring focus to this very important topic.

Once again, I'm not one that is against this book. It is paramount to those in my field that this information is available, but the rest of the world needs to be included also.

It's about time that someone took the time to write about wooden chinese toiet seats. Before this book I had to settle for pamphlets in the bathroom section of hoe depot.
Cons: $500 for a paperback book.
Pros: eligible for free shipping (that's $5 savings!!!)

Until this is either an app, or Kindleized, I can not give it more than one star. I'd love to be able to, as it's obviously of great value, but I need to be able to read it on the train during my commute.

Wow! What an amazing concept! First, I am aware that this product may be a spoof, like some other hilarious ads I've seen on Amazon. Second, assuming that it is not, a disclaimer. I have lived in Vietnam, visited Japan, and my wife lived in Japan for a year with her family. I have not been to China or researched their toilet habits. That said, I did spend 13 months in Vietnam as a medic, some of which was spent observing the resources and hygiene of the rural Vietnamese, I am wondering how many rural Chinese would by lining up to buy something that is probably pretty much a totally Western concept and product, unnecessary at best and arrogant and intrusive at worst. The Vietnamese and Japanese typically squatted over a trench-like latrine to relieve their bowels, which they could then flush. When one gets to the extremely impoverished, subsistence farming, villages, which usually did not have plumbing, or water or waste treatment facilities. Rural China is hard core third world. Good Lord, toilet seats? If they were wood, they would be burned for fuel. It reminds me of a story our lab tech told of when he was in the Peace Corps in Pakistan in the '60's. The local village had a tractor that was given to them by the Agency for International Development to help modernize the farming. The only use the tractor got was to give the villagers a ride into town! They had been farming the same way for hundreds of years, and didn't see a compelling need to change.