Customer Reviews

Aaron's Way: The Journey of a Strong-Willed Child

5 star:		(13)
4 star:		(4)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

I received this book as a gift during a retreat, and have read it with great excitement! I now know that I do in fact have a strong-willed child (as I suspected), but my husband and I will now hopefully do a much better job of parenting him! Thank you, Kendra and Aaron, for your honesty and willingness to share your story. I can only pray that my 'high-maintenance' child will grow and become the incredible man that your son has so obviously become. Thank you to Kendra and John for your willingness to share not only the success stories but also examples of what could have been done differently! God has blessed us with our children, and we are blessed by your writings.

The Birth to Five Book: Confident Childrearing Right from the Start

Strong willed children want to be loved, too. I know, I am one. When I was a child, my mother would get into power plays with me. I don't even remember the issue, but the challenge to win was the best part for me.

Strong-willed kids are also enamored with decision-making. As much as possible (or when appropriate), give them a choice. Wear them out with decision-making. Today as a mother of two daughters, I enjoy raising my women of substance, rather than overly-compliant, weak-willed kids.

I like how the author blows away some of the common assumptions of the strong-willed child. Her introspective questions guide readers into effective communication with their child. She also points out those strong-willed children can become great leaders, pioneers in a field, champions for justice, determined to attain goals, and wonderfully devoted friends. For parents struggling with ways to love and nurture relationship with their strong-willed child, find insights and strategies in this book.

Brenda Nixon, www.BrendaNixon.com
Author of Parenting Power in the Early Years

By virtue of the fact that I've found and read this book, my own strong-willed son (also named Aaron, coincidentally) will live to adulthood. This has been the most helpful and most informa-tive book that I've ever found for dealing with this issue and with these children who deserve respect and understanding.

As a Christian, I appreciated all the biblical citations found on practically every page to encourage me in my relationship with my child. If I had to choose between this book and Dr. James Dobson's new version of The Strong Willed Child, I'd choose this book!!! It is a long awaited treasure.

Before reading Journey of a Strong-Willed Child I did not realize that strong-willed did not mean stubborn. I simply assumed the terms were interchangable. Though according to the authors, being stubborn means having exceptional resolve. "Being strong-willed goes way beyond being stubborn. A strong-willed child resolutely defends his position and questions any and all authority over him to determine his or her 'right' to retain control." As soon as I read that I realized that I am actually not the mother of a strong-willed child in the sense the authors have described. I couldn't stop there though because I still am the mother of a two very wonderful, albeit, stubborn girls. Even if the book didn't apply to us 100% I knew I had to keep reading. You never know what you might learn or soak up from the experience.

The parenting strategies that Smiley brings light to in this fast paced read are nothing that any regular parent can't apply in his or her own home. Strong-willed child or not, kids will be kids. So most of the principles can apply in any household. Take for instance Smiley's point on being consistant and persistant. If you aren't you can't expect your child to A.) believe you'll follow through, B.) will find yourself running out of options. The example she gave was about potty training. With her first child there wasn't any issue when it came to potty training, but she quickly learned with her second child that every child is different. When one method didn't work for her second son she'd quickly move on to another. This, in a sense, allowed her son to set the ground rules because he was the one choosing when and when not to go to the toilet based on what he wanted to do. He was capable of going, he just chose not to go if he didn't want to.

I loved how scriptural back up was interspersed throughout each chapter, and I really enjoyed the overall matter of fact way the Smiley family came together to write this book. Having the opportunity to view all sides of the family dynamic allowed for an all inclusive look at raising and/or being a strong-will child. Readers can see what both parents thought and did about certain aspects of raising their strong-willed son, Aaron. But then in retrospect we also get to see what the adult Aaron has to say about it from his perspective. It's very enlightening.

I purchased this book after seeing Kendra and Aaron speak on this subject at a Hearts at Home conference a couple of years ago. Since then I have read it a couple of times, asked my husband to read it and loaned it to several friends as well. It is an eye-opening look at these ornery, exasperating and oh so loveable kids that God has given us to raise. I love having Aaron's comments at the end of each chapter. It has answered the question I ask myself so many times about my darling strong-willed daughter - "What was she thinking?!" Thank you Kendra and Aaron for saving my sanity and my daughter's life!

I bought this book after I heard Kendra and John speak. I, too, have a strong willed child, and this book has truly shown me insight into his mind. I like that it is written from Kendra and John's view (the parents) and from Aaron (the child). It has opened my eyes to my child and is allowing me to see him with more patient eyes. Hopefully I'll do as wonderful of a job raising my son as you did yours. Thank you for a well written, insightful book.

Melissa
Mother of 2 boys, ages 5 and 3

As the mother of a strong-willed child, and having read many books on the subject, I am so impressed with this book. The big difference in this book is that it is written by the mother of the strong-willed child AND the strong-willed child as an adult.
Kendra Smiley writes in a very readable way. Her narrative is interesting and clear, particularly regarding discipline. She tells where they made mistakes, and how they corrected them, and how parents need to be a cohesive unit.
What really blew me away,however, was reading Aaron's part of the book and hearing his perspective. There are things I never knew about how the strong-willed child is thinking and,thus,reacting.
You just have to read it for yourself. I can not recommend this book enough for the parent of a strong-willed child. I wish this book was around when my daughter was young, but, alas, Aaron was growing up!

As the mother of a strong-willed child, I was eager to read Kendra Smiley's book, Journey of a Strong-Willed Child. I have gleaned from a plethora of child-training books, which often fail to give solid, Christian advice on raising a strong willed child. Journey of a Strong-Willed Child is written by John and Kendra Smiley, who have learned many lessons while raising a strong-willed child of their own. A highlight of this book is that the Smiley's son, Aaron, shares his experiences as a strong-willed person.Journey of a Strong-Willed Child is divided into chapters giving parenting tips from birth to beyond college.
One of my favorite aspects of Journey of a Strong-Willed Child is the Smiley's practical advice on how to encourage unity amongst siblings, rather than a lack of harmony. The Smiley's exhort parents to reduce competition amongst siblings, as much as possible, since this is the most common source of sibling rivalry.
If you have a strong-willed child, I highly encourage you to read this book for some practical, Christ-centered inspiration. The Smiley's know what it is like to experience both the frustrations and the blessings of a strong-willed child. They humbly share tips on encouraging, rather than discouraging strong-willed children. The Smiley's dispel common myths about strong-willed children, and show how to cast a purposeful life-vision, for your child. What a blessing to "hear counsel, and receive instruction" (Proverbs 19:20) from an older Christian couple, who have learned much, in raising a strong-willed child for the Lord.

As the parent of an extremely strong-willed 5 year old boy, I found this book very reassuring and helpful. I've read over 50 parenting books in the past few years, and this was the first and only one that actually helped me understand WHY my son does what he does. Having the perspective of Aaron (the son) was very enlightening - and for that reason, I gave the book 5 stars. If you're looking for a book that will give you techniques for parenting your strong-willed child - this is probably not the best book for you (for that, I highly recommend "Setting Limits with Your Strong-Willed Child : Eliminating Conflict by Establishing Clear, Firm, and Respectful Boundaries" by Robert J. MacKenzie). Also, it should be noted that some readers may be bothered by the writers' Christian perspective. However, if you want a glimpse inside the mind of a strong-willed child so you can better understand why your child makes the decisions and choices he/she does, then get this book!

Recently, my mom gave me this book. I had not previously heard of the book and did not know what to expect, but she had pre-read it and told me that she saw my oldest son in its pages. I was curious to see if I would agree.



As Joshua is my oldest child and all of the stages he has gone through have been the first time for us as parents to go through them, I have been very hesitant to "label" him as strong-willed. After all, weren't all children born with a tendency to not want to be controlled by anyone but themselves, like "sheep all gone astray"? However, as he has gotten older and his younger siblings have gone through the same ages and stages without the same difficulties and challenges, I have come to realize that he is more high-maintenance than most, even though he is not my most outrightly defiant child.



So, I read the book and found it very insightful and encouraging; it inspired hope in me! One of my favorite parts of the book is that Kendra's own strong-willed child, now a responsible and godly adult, shares his comments at the end of each chapter. I felt like I got a glimpse into my Joshua's head by reading his commentaries! It was great to hear about what was going on in his thinking when he pulled his antics at four, eight or sixteen years old. Truly insightful.