Customer Reviews

About Love: Reinventing Romance for Our Times

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(0)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

About Love is a welcome burst of genius on the topic most in need and deserving of it. "Relationship" books are a category where sloppy reasoning abounds and where simple selfishness is often offered as a legitimate approach to meaningful intimacy. This book however, is a genuine masterpiece. More than any other writer on this topic, and more than most writers on any topic, Mr. Solomon enters the big issues and emerges with, in my opinion, the Truth. About Love is about, as it must be, people, history, intimacy, respect, loyalty and fulfillment. In short, it is about the things which matter most and the things which form the raw materials of romantic love and meaningful relationships. This is not a book which can be properly digested in one pass. Rather, it offers the more intense satisfaction of new and interesting insights from repeated readings. It is best digested a little at a time and held up as a lens through which to view one's personal landscape. A degree of dedication is required (just like love itself) as early portions of the book review the history of romantic love in a rather scholastic and philosophical light. Little by little however, the insights build upon each other and become more personal, leading to compelling insights and philosophies on all the big issues of love including love at first sight, romantic tension, loyalty, and making love last. Sprinkled throughout is also a series of inspired quotations: Lauren Bacall's observation on the importance of fidelity is worth the price of admission in itself. In the years since I was fortunate enought to stumble upon this book, I have not read or heard reasoning on the topic of romantic love or human relations which equals that found in its pages. Overall, it is the finest book I have ever read, and for the motivated reader, I highly recommend it.

This is the most insightful book on the topic of love that there is. After my divorce 10 years ago, I did what a lot of people do and read a lot of so-called "self-help" books. This is not a self-help book but it does provide a very down-to-earth discussion of what real love between two mature adults really is all about. Love is complex and one of the neat things about this book is that the author defines love in many different ways. The primary insight here is that ideally romantic love is not an obsession, not idealistic, and it involves re-defining oneself as a part of a couple. This is perhaps why so many people who are over 40 and are unattached find it hard to become part of a couple. But the book also holds out hope for love that is permanent and lasting and grows deeper with time.

I don't understand why this book never got "big". It is so comprehensive, with all its references to history and cultures and even mythology, and so balanced and insightful. I read this book over ten years ago and just recently pulled it out to reread the many parts I had highlighted. That's a rare thing. I wish more people knew about it. For anyone who is fascinated in analyzing and thinking about what love is, it's a very important piece of work that really makes you think and see things differently. Though the author is not offering his insights as facts, just the fact that they are offered opens up new doors from which to view love in your life and in general. One of my favorite works of non-fiction.

I first read this book as part of a Philosophy of Love course in college and it truly shaped and reinforced many of my views on Romantic Love. I do believe that we as humans have an inherent need for loving companionship, but Solomon does a great job in deconstructing the Westen idea of Love and how it has shaped our culture and our relationships. I re-read it after my divorce and it helped me to see myself and my relationship with the ex more lucidly. As I move forward in my new relationship with a wonderful woman who has more compatible notions of Love to me, I recently decided to re-read it once again and share it with her so that we can grow together and really analyze the strengths and weaknesses in our love for one another and to be able to have concrete reasons for our love and an ability to express and describe that love. Solomon does not simply pessimistically deconstruct Love and leave it in pieces, but instead, looks at it from a historical, social, interpersonal and cultural perspective and does it in a way that suggests that we can re-create our concepts on Love, but does not lead one to any one "self-help" conclusion. Great read- needs a bump from someone to encourage more people to read it on a large scale. Oprah? Colbert? Any takers?

I couldn't put this book down! It's well written with a lot of information, both historic and modern. I never knew our current view of love is a rather new view, one that has been hashed out of centuries of religious, social and economic growth. We tend to take love for granted and out on a spiritual and metaphysical plane with no more than a few quotes to get us by, but, few of us ever ask why it is this way and why do we feel what we feel. When the verbiage of the latest self help book, the newest romance movie or song that tears your heart is over, it's nice to get some basic information and a few new ideas.

There are a lot of resources in this book and it has also given me many more reading ideas. If you're looking for a book that breaks away all of the mysticism of love yet allows you to reinvent what love is for you, this is the book. It's not touchy feely, it's not self help and it definitely isn't a how to book. If anything, it left me questioning why it is a feel or think what I always have. It has given me a new understanding of what love is and what my role in it is. I was disappointed when it was done, I wish there was more!

I reiterate what the other reviewers have said; This is an extraordinarily excellent book on the subject of LOVE. I have read many on the subject including Why We Love by Dr. Helen Fisher. Solomon's book is equally articulate and insightful. Many of the pages in my book are highlighted and I like to return to these passages when I need a little re-affirming about this crazy thing called LOVE.