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Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence Paperback – February 24, 2009

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Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence + The Verbally Abusive Relationship, Expanded Third Edition: How to recognize it and how to respond + Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
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Editorial Reviews


• Investigates the evidence for abuse of men as a significant social problem

• Includes new material about domestic violence against gay men

• Updates information from the first edition on laws, legislation, court activity, social responses, police activity, support groups, batterer programs, and crisis intervention programs

• Tells victims how to get help and free themselves from abuse

• Recommends necessary reforms in approaches to reducing domestic violence

• The latest research figures and up-to-date surveys on the prevalence of intimate partner violence against men

• Personal interviews and cases drawn from media coverage of politicians and other public figures

• A selected bibliography

"Recommended. Public and academic libraries serving programs with an interest in domestic violence, or those seeking to develop extensive holdings in this area; all levels."




"[This book] reads like 1,000 Dear Abby letters…fascinating…but it explains the many aspects of domestic violence. It has a wealth of material that could be helpful to professionals who deal with domestic violence." (Dear Abby Abigail Van Buren)|"I am grateful to Philip Cook for writing ^IAbused Men^R. This is a brave book…. [The author] brings to bear in this book his knowledge as a journalist and his evident care and compassion for all victims of domestic violence." (Erin Pizzey,Founder of Chiswick Women's Refuge,Author, Scream Quietly or the Neighbors Will Hear)|"This just might be the volume to get the message across finally that domestic violence is a human problem, not just a gender problem." (R.L. McNeely, Ph.D., J.D. Attorney, Professor of Social Welfare, University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee)|"Very thought-provoking and well researched. [This book] should aid in educating medical professionals regarding this potential diagnosis as well as help shape our legal approach." (Kenneth H. Coleman, M.D. J.D.^LAttorney at Law)|"Thought provoking research which will stimulate further inquiry into human behavior long neglected." (Ronald R. Still, M.S. Chief of Police (Retired), Portland, Oregon)|"Mr. Cook argues persuasively that we may be looking at only half the problem, and we're neglecting the needs of male victims. It also seems clear that much of Mr. Cook's work applies equally to abused people of either gender, and he offers practical suggestions for the abused. His solutions would impact all cases of domestic violence and are well worth our consideration." (Rob Solomon, Licensed Professional Counselor Author, Full-Esteem Ahead)|"Perhaps with this book, Philip Cook can accomplish what academics have for the past 25 years failed to do--to cut through the political rhetoric and finally present the case of abused men as a real social problem. Cook goes beyond the issue of battered males as he sheds incredible insight into the systemic problem of family violence. Perhaps now, couples experiencing violence in their relationships can be helped. His case material sadly brings to life the statistics researchers generate." (Reena Sommer, Ph.D., Assistant Professor, University of Manitoba, Family Counselor)|"I find ^IAbused Men^R most appealing because of the rigorous research upon which the findings are based. There is nothing that is not fully substantiated by data…I appreciate the balance achieved in addressing a topic, usually ignored, in an era of accusations and hysteria that often detracts from the actual aggression and violence that affects domestic relations. This book is a real contribution that will help in the education of all professionals in the field of sociology and mental health." (Stanley G. Sturges, M.D. Medical Director, CareMark Behavioral Health Services)|"Unique. The case materials presented are gripping, and need to be part of the historical and social record. It is a book likely to be helpful to many men, and if action is taken onthe agenda outlined in the final chapter, to our country as a whole." (Murray A. Straus, Ph.D. Co-Director Family Research Laboratory, University of New Hampshire)

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 232 pages
  • Publisher: Praeger; 2 edition (February 24, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0313356718
  • ISBN-13: 978-0313356711
  • Product Dimensions: 6.1 x 0.6 x 9.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (32 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #881,531 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Investigative journalist Philip W. Cook is the author of Abused Men-The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence (ABC-Clio Second Edition 2009-Greenwood/Praeger First Edition 1997). He is the author of the 2013 book, When Women Sexually Abuse Men-The Hidden Side of Rape, Stalking, Harassment and Sexual Assault with criminologist Tammy Hodo, PhD. Mr. Cook is a professional journalist whose work objectively examines and explains relevant research results, the feelings and problems of interviewed victims, as well as provider and media response to the issue. He has examined scores of national and international domestic violence and family programs and evaluated their potential for helpful replication. His presentation and book has received high praise from a diverse spectrum of society such as "Dear Abby", leading domestic violence sociologists, attorneys, physicians, law enforcement, and numerous mental health professionals. "Fascinating ... explains the many aspects of domestic violence. A wealth of material that could be helpful." 'Dear Abby' Abigail Van Buren, Syndicated Columnist.
Mr. Cook has appeared on numerous national radio and television shows such as CNN, MSNBC, Fox TV's "The Crier Report", "The O'Reilly Factor" (twice), "The Montel Williams Show", "The Sally Jesse Raphael Show", "The Home and Family Show", Westwood Radio Network (Jim Bohannon Show, Dirk Van), and CBS radio. His articles about domestic violence have been published in The Employee Assistance Professional "Exchange" Magazine, The Oregonian, Women's Freedom Network Magazine, Deseret News, Eugene Register-Guard, and many other publications. He is the co-author of articles in the distinguished academic publication "The Journal for Human Behavior in the Social Environment", and "Journal of Elder Abuse" and his articles have been published in two supplemental college textbooks, including Domestic Violence (Greenhaven Press-2000), as well as an two anthology books published by Disinformation Press. He has been extensively quoted or interviewed as an expert on male victims of domestic violence in more than 100 radio talk shows, as well as in numerous publications such as "Medical Economics", "Law Enforcement Technology" and numerous times in both local and national wire services, (Associated Press Canadian Associated Press) as well as many daily newspapers. "The engaging style of a journalist providing an in-depth discussion of a topic that he acknowledges is controversial." -Journal of Marriage and the Family

Mr. Cook was a radio and television director of news. He was news director at radio stations in Portland, Oregon, San Antonio, Texas, and in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area. He also served as director of television news or assistant director of news at television stations in Reno, Nevada and Kennewick, Washington. He has received awards for his reporting from The Associated Press, The Professional Journalism Society, and the Radio Television News Directors Association .He is a graduate of the University of Oregon (79) with a BS in Journalism.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

51 of 53 people found the following review helpful By graeme on December 16, 2002
Format: Hardcover
Congratulations for writing a book on this subject. You may save some lives. I work for a voluntary organisation in the UK called ManKind that helps male victims of domestic violence, as until we set up this chairty last year there was nowhere for abused men to turn. Some of the other reviews here show a major problem we have: wherever we go to try for funding or even charity status we seem to meet people who say: no, abused men don't exist, or that if they do they ask for it, or they enjoy it (when I have received a phone call from a man in tears who has just been stabbed in the arm and thrown out of his (their) home with his (their) two children, I can't believe that people can make this claim), or they should be able to look after themselves. What matters is that being abused, verbally or physically, by someone who you love or who you are in a relationship with, is absolutely terrible, about the worst thing that will happen to anyone unfortunate to experience it. I know because it happened to me last year, out of the blue, but it trapped me and took me to the edge of a cliff. This abusive relationship (I'm 6ft andover 12stone, she's 5ft 4in and 8 stone) left me with more than 100 bruises and cuts, three bust ribs and mental scars that will take years to heal. NEVER ONCE DID I HOLD HER, THREATEN HER OR HIT HER BACK. I believe she is very unwell and was, as is often the case in abusive relationships, hitting someone else (in her mind) when she hit me. Incidentally, ManKind chairty has started to help female abusers as there is nowhere they can turn in the UK either - further evidence that this problem has just been ignored until now.Read more ›
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40 of 42 people found the following review helpful By Eugen Lupri on April 25, 2003
Format: Hardcover
Philip Cook's Abused Men  is well conceived, well documented, and well written; it is an excellent source book for both perpetrators and victims of domestic violence as well as for  police officers, community leaders, health care providers, family therapists, crisis-line workers, and other helping professionals. Another positive aspect of this book is Cook's  ability to make research findings on male abuse and its consequences accessible and understandable for readers new to the field of domestic violence. The book can serve as an eye opener about the factions, disagreements, and controversy that are part of the issue of domestic violence.
Eugen Lupri, Ph.D.
Professor Emeritus of Sociology
The University of Calgary
Calgary, Alberta
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37 of 39 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on December 23, 1999
Format: Hardcover
If the woman in your life is out to get you, you must read this book. It is extremely helpful and the only book I know of exclusively on the subject of husband/boyfriend battering by women. The statistics in this book are surprising and the stories of the abused men in this book are its strongest point. This is really a breakthrough book.
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23 of 25 people found the following review helpful By T. Miller on September 17, 2005
Format: Hardcover
Author Phil Cook does and excellent job of documenting and presenting a logical case that Abused Men (and fathers and their children) by women is very real, large as life, often denied and usually very "hidden" - the proverbial elephant in your back yard. If you ignore and deny it, it won't matter, or "doesn't exist."

An extra pat on the back for the author on making his case for abused men while not discounting the seriousness of domestic violence (DV) against women, and without exaggerating the real amount of violence on either side. It would be fool-hardy to do the opposite, as many authors do, exposing their ignorance, bias, prejudice and even their own abusiveness to the victims of these sensitive issues, where revictimization often comes at the hands of "well-meaning" authors and officials. Though this book is 8 years old it is still very applicable today, as is the excellent and fairly well balanced 25 year old book, "Behind Closed Doors, Domestic Violence in the American Family," quoted by the author.

Had "Abused Men" been written today more could have been included to support the fact that male victims are beyond all doubt no less commonly (and severely) victimized as female victims, despite mis-drawn but often quoted conclusions from some not-so-balanced studies. Examples: The Department of Justice (DOJ) stats which the author quotes from the early 90's have since risen dramatically for male victims, as the eyes of some victim advocates are just starting to open. DOJ stats now concede that men comprise about 35% to 40% of all DV victims (a far shot from the then 8-15%), but closing the reality gap bit by bit. Most balanced and extensive studies reveal that younger women are up to twice as violent as younger men.
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35 of 40 people found the following review helpful By J. Steven Svoboda (real name) on October 9, 2002
Format: Hardcover
Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence. Philip W. Cook.
Westport, Connecticut: Praeger Publications, 1997.
More than twenty years ago, Murray Straus and Richard Gelles
published their first landmark study and Erin Pizzey wrote Prone to
Violence, both documenting the dreadful truth that women and men
commit violence against their spouses with roughly equal frequency
at all levels of severity. And yet today, nearly all Americans
still buy into the media-created myth that domestic violence is
something men almost exclusively do to women.
Philip Cook's badly needed book is the first to comprehensively
focus on men as victims of domestic violence. Cook's achievement
is admirable. Not only does he cover his topic succinctly and
thoroughly, meticulously documenting each step he takes, but he
also delves into a number of pertinent related issues lesser
authors might have missed entirely.
Cook starts with the facts, noting that in about half of all
domestic violence cases, both partners are engaged in mutual
combat. In 25% of the cases, the man is the aggressor, and in the
other quarter of the cases, the woman is the aggressor. Cook
succinctly summarizes differences between male and female patterns
of violence and injury: men tend to use bodily force more and to
injure women more severely when they do so. Men rarely use violent
women's favorite weapons, knives and guns. Multiple injuries are
less common for men but their single injuries caused by weapons
often require medical attention.
Cook always manages to keep his eye on the larger picture,
discussing the disturbing circle of violence often created when
battering is witnessed by children.
Read more ›
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