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Accoutrements Handerpants
Size: One Size Fits MostColor: White, BlueChange
Price:$10.19+Free shipping
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121 of 127 people found the following review helpful
on October 3, 2009
I mean, I always wanted my crotch and my hands to have more in common, now they do!
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40 of 41 people found the following review helpful
on January 24, 2012
Don't eat brown or yellow food with these, it makes it look like you crapped your hands. Other than that, they are great.
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57 of 64 people found the following review helpful
I loved this product when I got it in the mail, I mean, they come in pairs! The white cotton is breathable and durable. Everything you'd want in underpants. I've been looking for these for a long time. These underpants come with all the necessary holes pre-sewn to accomodate 4 legs and a tail. It was tough to get them on Mittens at first but soon with a few staples and some duct tape, he's doing fine. No more unsightly furry male cat genitalia for upstanding citizens to have to be affronted by. Thanks, Handerpants!
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104 of 128 people found the following review helpful
on February 17, 2011
As a genetic bio-engineer, I am working on architecting the growth of organs and appendages via biological induction grafting. For you dummies, that means I do things like grow human ears on mice. It's super cool.

One day I fell asleep at work, in the lab, and a couple of the office knuckleheads decided to prank yours truly. Here's what went down. See, we had this dick in the freezer - some Japanese guy kicked off and donated it to us. It's in his will and everything. Pretty wild, right?

So, other than occasionally pulling it out of the fridge and sticking it in Benny's ear for a goof, it doesn't get much action.

Currently we're working on growing a thumb - it's pretty great because all the mice look like they're doing the Fonz's "Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy" as they have a big thumb sticking up on their backs.

Because we're so tied up with the thumb, we have no time to mess around with the freezer dick. Eventually we'll learn how to grow dicks, although more people need new thumbs than dicks, you know?

But, back to my story.

I passed out around noon after a particularly heavy Arby's beef and cheddar lunch. It was one of those five-for-five deals, and I put down the sandwiches in about seven minutes.

When I woke up, Carl was pointing at my hand and laughing. Those bozos has grafted the Japanese dick to my right palm!

Well, two weeks later and the dick's still attached. Apparently my body has "accepted" the dick, and if I have it removed, it'll die or something.

I know - totally bummed.

I reported Carl to HR - although, I did have to admit it was a pretty solid gag. But, walking around with a dick on my hand is a little inconvenient. Plus, it's embarrassing.

Most people don't like seeing dicks in public - there's actually a lot of trouble you can get in showing you dick around town. It's a big deal to the law.

I found the Handerpants on Amazon. It sucks to type with a dick on your hand, as I'm always hitting the "/" key accidentally.

I can now go out into public with ALL of me. My real dick and my palm-dick are both out of sight. And the gloves are fingerless, so I have a little hipster fashion thing going on.

Thank you Handerpants!

Attention public - if you see me walking around, do NOT give me a high five. That really hurts!
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24 of 27 people found the following review helpful
on December 2, 2010
Meh. These are ok, but I have "big hands" if you know what I'm sayin', so I'm hoping for a pouch design that will help alleviate the unsightly palm bulge that has left me more than a little embarrassed on several occasions. Also, I wouldn't mind seeing a thong design for the warmer months. Nothing's worse than having a sweaty hand leave obvious streaks across your hand skivvies.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
on December 12, 2011
these are totally awesome, they fit me with a little room so hopefully my boyfriends fits in to them comfortably. We will see what he thinks come Xmas!
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13 of 16 people found the following review helpful
on January 9, 2012
Got these as a gag gift for the family gift exchange. The lady that got them, who has small hands anyhow, could not get these on her hands. Other people tried to try them on and they would not go past their fingers. They would not fit anyone with hands larger than my 7 year old son. Thus, guess who they went home with? Yep, my 7 year old son. Who absolutely loves them and thinks they are the funniest thing EVER. They still received the desired laugh I had intended and I would purchase again for that same effect. But if you are purchasing these and actually expect the recipient to put the them on....then you'll be expecting too much and will be disappointed. That's why I only give these a middle of the road rating with 3 stars.
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6 of 7 people found the following review helpful
on February 10, 2012
Put these in my son's Christmas stocking. Funniest item in the stocking and worth every penny to hear jokes all morning. Split up the pair and each son had one--they now use them for drinking gloves....
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9 of 12 people found the following review helpful
on January 8, 2011
I was just thinking to myself, "If only my hands could wear underwear like my bum!" And what do you know! Astonishing, isn't it?

My only complaint is that it gives my hands this unfortunate jock itch. But other than that, a good buy!
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful
VINE VOICEon October 27, 2010
There are no more awkward moments of uncertainty, as the derriere stares at approaching hands that must certainly look ghastly or threatening. Rectum? You know the rest. Fear no more with Handerpants; there is familiarity, kinship. They're in the same social circle, the same gang. The fear associated with mud butt has a cure!

Softer than Charmin, there remains one major flaw with this product: the fingerless design. Let me just say that things get a bit messy regardless of hygienic techniques if you're finishing off a pint and a plate of nuclear hot wings.

Definitely worth the purchase to ease the rectal anguish
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