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Accoutrements Emergency Underpants
|Price:||$6.89 & FREE Shipping on orders over $35. Details|
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- Enter your model number above to make sure this fits.
- 100% Polyester
- Great gag gift, useful as well
- Safe, sanitary and secure
- Fits most adults
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CHOKING HAZARD -- Small parts. Not for children under 3 yrs.
From the Manufacturer
Top Customer Reviews
During my first gear inspection, the Lieutenant asked me if I was wearing what he referred to as 'standard issue' emergency underpants under my uniform. I admitted that I was unaware of the requirement having only briefly skimmed the handbook the night before. He reached into his briefcase and pulled out several packets of these Emergency Underpants. Handing them to me, he instructed that prior to going on any calls, I was to put these on. All of my more senior peers nodded in agreement and acted like I was a bit dim witted for not knowing about them.
Pros: They keep the 'beans and the frank' from getting caught in the zipper at least, which is pretty much all
I ask out of my underbritches. Presumably they somehow help deal with emergencies.
Cons: They crinkle when I walk. They tend to ride up and give me a wedgie, and they have caused alot of chafing
in areas that I prefer remain unchafed.
As an interesting side note, I have found that in addition to emergencies, they'll provide all of the features listed above in grave situations, serious conditions, and even matters of mild concern.
Wear them in good health. And consider buying some Desitin cream to go with them.
- Performed CPR on my mother
- Saved a school of orphans after their boat sank
- Rescued 235 stray dogs
- Brought my dead grandmother back to life for Christmas
- Single-handedly stopped a 5-alarm apartment fire using only 1 gallon of Tuscan Milk
- Saved the life of at least 3 Presidents from yacht accidents/pretzel mishaps
Need I say more?
Buy at least 45 packs of Emergency Underpants at once. You will never regret them, Trust Me!
P.S. Amazon also sells these used. If you want to buy one that's already had someone else's slushie spilled on it, who am I to judge?
Most Recent Customer Reviews
This was a gift addition to make fun at a friend. They thought it was hilarious.Published 6 days ago by AO Scott
Hilarious white elephant gift. Container is much smaller in real life thoughPublished 21 days ago by Amanda V.
my wife wanted this for a white elephant gift. was a real hit at the family partyPublished 1 month ago by ec