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Act Like A Man Paperback – October 27, 2011


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 244 pages
  • Publisher: Dell Lane Press (October 27, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0984738401
  • ISBN-13: 978-0984738403
  • Product Dimensions: 0.5 x 5.4 x 8.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (26 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,300,857 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

For twenty-five years, author and speaker Ken Solin has worked with men to move them beyond the issues that affect their relationships and limit their lives. His insights into trust and intimacy, sex and sexuality, fatherhood and friendship, and marriage and divorce have earned him a loyal following of both men and women. Ken writes about sex, dating, and relationships for The Huffington Post, About.com's Senior Living, and DigitalRomanceInc.com. Ken has also written boomer dating articles for AARP's online magazine. Act Like a Man chronicles Ken's men's group over fifteen years.

Ken is a dating coach. His extensive online dating experience coupled with the experiences of the thousands of readers who comment on his articles give Ken a unique perspective on boomer dating. The majority of Ken's clients are women who particularly appreciate his knowledge of the male perspective garnered from decades of working with men in groups. Ken's clients are all over the United States and he meets with them weekly via Skype.

Ken also counsels men about their issues. While he's not a therapist, Ken feels that most men's issues are related to traditional male role models and behavior, and that men respond positively to his experiential advise. Issues such as anger, divorce, dating, relationships, lack of friends, fatherhood, and many others men face are all topics Ken feels confident helping his clients face. Ken has clients in the United States as well as other countries and he meets with them weekly via Skype.

Ken's new boomer dating book, You Gotta Have Heart-To Find Your True Love Online, will be available on Amazon as an ebook, shortly.

Ken's website, www.kensolin.com, includes articles, interviews, and videos about men and relationships.

He lives in Northern California.

Customer Reviews

4.8 out of 5 stars
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See all 26 customer reviews
Lighthearted and humorous reading material.
Stewart C. Sutton
This book better explains the male mind than anything I have read since John Gray's "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus," was published back in 1992.
Martin B. Brown
People who read this book will understand the struggles of men much more completely.
Geo Taylor

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Anthony Ragona on November 25, 2011
Format: Paperback
Witness the evolution of a group of men build trust and intimacy, enabling most to find peace within. A down to earth read which will help in everyday life with all personal, business, and most importantly the relationship one has with themselves. Should be a mandatory read in college.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Geo Taylor on November 21, 2011
Format: Paperback
For those who think that men cannot reveal their feelings, this book is an illuminating antidote. The men in the group that Ken Solin describes laugh, cry, get angry, hurt, etc. Why? Because within a group format, they learned to trust each other. Most men never find that safe place, in a group, or in a relationship, where they can speak out freely about their hopes and fears. Society imposes so many restraints on us.

"Act Like a Man" shows real men speaking the real truth to each other. By doing so, the men deepen not only into their relationships with each other, but into self-understanding. People who read this book will understand the struggles of men much more completely.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful By Martin B. Brown on November 19, 2011
Format: Paperback
Solin expands our knowledge base of what it means to be a man. His work as an author and speaker over the last two decades has given him unique and powerful insights into the topics that men and women want to better understand. The true meaning of fatherhood and friendship are explored. Male intimacy, the trials of marriage and the heartbreak of divorce are all covered with new and refreshing insight. This book better explains the male mind than anything I have read since John Gray's "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus," was published back in 1992. If you want to understand the 21st Century male this book is for you!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By HarleyGrinn on December 21, 2011
Format: Paperback
If you want a book you just can't put down and you love eaves dropping on other people's lives then this book is for you! I've always known that men and women were different but I had no idea how emotionally stunted most men were until I read this book. Author Ken Solin takes us through the issues of a men's group he started. We get to read about their biggest life issues and how they come through them together. I've never read so much honesty in one book and for myself, coming from an acting background, that's really great. If you're a woman like me who is curious about how guys think then this is a great way to gain a little more insight in to the men in your life. Aside from a few annoying typographical errors, this was a great read and it's not my usual genre either. I highly recommend it!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By lorenzodi on December 20, 2011
Format: Paperback
Wow! This book woke me up and opened my heart. For years, as men we are told not to cry and dont be emotional. This is absolutely
required reading for all young adolescent men as they go on their journey to manhood. It gives me great insight into our fathers from
an earlier generation who were emotionally "unavailable". It is now time for all men to catch up. Please keep passing the word on this.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Jeff S on November 29, 2011
Format: Paperback
I think this book shows us that there were many things our fathers couldn't teach us. Ken shows us that there is a safe place for men to explore what it really means to be a man in our society. It is clearly a process that men need to do together and that there is wisdom and shared strength in a group. Through the process Ken describes I hope that we can do better at passing along these lessons to our sons. I highly recommend this book! For men who want to better understand themselves and to be able to better connect with others in their lives.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Kyle on January 1, 2012
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
It's a bit cliche, but I finished this book on January 1st, and it really has me thinking about how to improve my relationships with both men and women in this new year. I get the sense that I am much younger than the men portrayed in the book, but I have learned a few valuable lessons about relationship best-practices, as well as further realizing my own role in what happens in my life, good or bad.

This book is written in a conversational style that, as others have pointed out, makes you feel like you're ironically breaking a an established group rule and being an observer right there in the room. I think that every man will at some point feel like a character is speaking for him. Since the meetings mainly deal with various issues like intimacy, trust, abandonment, etc., and uses the men's names and information really as placeholders, it is easy to pick out a viewpoint or experience that matches your own in each conversation and to understand other viewpoints and experiences and learn from them as well. The book takes place over several years, and the benefit of the advice given to each man is apparent over time.

Though there are a lot of changes coming up in my life as I graduate college, I do plan to reach out to some other men once things calm down for me, and start a group. The progress of the men portrayed in the group is very inspiring and a great model for any man looking to improve himself.
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Format: Kindle Edition
This was an awesome journey of half a dozen men in a men's group, inspired by Robert Bly's men's movement. Today's young men have no rite of passage, no elders that initiate them into manhood, and this causes tremendous confusion, pain, and lack of confidence.

Though I am a woman, it was extremely intriguing to enter this private world of men's emotions, conflicts, fears, etc. For some of these men, being vulnerable with other men would have been "suicidal" in the neighborhoods they grew up in. Yet as the years passed, "Everyone sat back and reveled in the recognition that we were a tight group of men all pulling our oars in the same direction--toward healing."

The men met a couple of times a month. There was no leader. They intentionally broke all the male taboos against being vulnerable, expressing feelings, hugging, etc. They discussed feelings, single parenting, women, dating, abusive fathers, tough childhoods, divorce, abandonment, intimacy, trust issues, boundaries, self esteem, and more.

We get a private peek into these lives, including how the author evolves from being in an S & M relationship to having a very healthy relationship with a woman he wants to marry. We learn how the group helps him when his son dies. One man confesses to the others how an early betrayal completely dissolved his trust in women.

The author explains that "Most of us were working diligently toward self-knowledge, self-improvement, better relationships with women, and greater sensitivity to and openness with each other."

He details how they all benefited from the group: "But every single one of us who dug deep, uncovered his demons, faced them head-on, and did the work, became a better husband, boyfriend, father, and friend. Every single one...
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