Customer Reviews

Addicted to Love: Understanding Dependencies of the Heart: Romance, Relationships, and Sex

5 star:		(7)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

This book was extremely helpful in my recovery. I learned how to evalute my own needs and the reasons I choose certain people to get in relationship with. It pulled she cover off my denial. Which is not a fun thing, but necessary for hope and a future. It may have prevented more heartbreak and pain in my future relationships. I felt like parts of this book were written about me. Dr. Arterburn obviously has a good grasp of codependency and other addictions. Buy it. It may change your life.

AA is a spiritual recovery program for the alcoholic that has been proven throuout the decades. Finally there is a book offering the same healing techniques for those caught it addictions just as painful and devistating. I found it not to be preachy nor fundamental as others have commented, but rather a book calling for accountability of one's actions and a recognition of God (Higher Power in AA terms)as a loving a healing force that helps and directs one to their own healthy and loving potetial.

For a person new to sex and relationship addictions, the information in this book was eye opening, informative, focused and gave hope that the problem CAN be solved. Highly recommend.

I read a lot of self-help books too, and this was a life-changing book for me. It really set home with me that the reason we choose certain actions in life is because our need for Love is the root of it all. This realization has made a permanent reflection in my mind.

I am not a Christian, or even a believer - and there are times when the persistant (but fairly gentle) religious overtones of the book annoyed me.

However this book told me more about my partner and myself than any I have read - the analysis is sound and eye-opening and the 'prescription', if you wish to substitute your own spiritual path for the authors (making sure that you really ARE squashing your ego, which is hard for non-believers to do) is sound too.

Tony, Lancashire, England

I was given this book by a friend 8 years ago and was offended. I put it on a shelf and didn't bother with it for over a year. I read it one day when my life and marriage seemed to be falling apart, and I began to understand some of what was driving the chaos in my life. Beyond explanations, its message drew me toward a relationship with God and encouraged me to talk about things that seemed unspeakable to me. I found others who were working out these issues and began to redraw the canvas of my life. What a gift my friend gave me back then. I'm glad she had the courage to risk offending me to help me.

This practical book offers a lot of insight into love, relationship and sexual addictions. Provides useful recovery therapies, especially for Christians. Believe it or not, I bought this book to see if the negative reviews were true. They aren't. So, if you are are atheist or close-minded, or so liberal you're just plain bent, then this book isn't for you. Go to the quack-shrink of your choice. However, if you are reasonable to 12-Step programs, then this book will be appealing.

It helped me deal with a loved one in my life who's behavior suddenly seemed to go off the deep end. Reading the case studies allowed me to see the loved one's behavior as part of a larger pattern. Although the problems are still there, it has given me a way of understanding and dealing with the problems.

Most of us already realize we attract what we get in life, and are already kicking ourselves. My break through was when I read "Loving What Is" Four Questions that can change your life by Byron Katie with Stephen Mitchell. My life truelly changed after that book and set me upon a new path of living life with joy. I was then able to go to Landmark Education and complete it's courses through the advanced course. Had I not read the book by Byron Katie, the Landmark Education would not have been possible. I know I am off topic, but seriously, I was set on a course of destruction and though getting through the Landmark was not easy because I was so set on my old hang-ups and self-created stories that were not true, I made it! Giving oneself permission to live an extraordinary life is a challenge when all you know is negative self talk. As Katie teaches, "It's not the problem that causes our suffering: it's our thinking about the problem,"
Back to topic - skip this book and get Loving What Is. Hope this helps.

THis book is wonderful. We use it in discipleship with women who struggle with substance and behavior addictions, knowing that their underlying addiction is invariably relationships and that their addictions are symptoms, not the underlying problem. This is great for small group discussion, An easy read and a great tool to minister to those who are trapped in the cycle of addiction to relationships that are unhealthy. Excellent book.