Customer Reviews

Adopted and Loved Forever

5 star:		(5)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

For adopted children and for parents to read to their adopted young children,this is a good begining book,but if you are not christian or perfer not to be quite so dogmatic,this might not be the book for you.

I got this book to share with my children, but having read it I won't be doing so. Though our family is Christian, this book is far too fundamentalist. That in itself could be fine for some families, but I find some of the language about adoption dated, offensive, and potentially difficult for children who have been adopted. The term "natural" parents is unfortunately used. There are also lines such as "I try to show Jesus how happy I am for giving me my mom and dad by obeying them," and (in a prayer) "Help me to show my parents how much I love them for wanting me." My concern is that reading those to my children would send them a message that they should be grateful for us having adopted them. I do not consider this a suitable book about adoption.

I read the previous reviews. I disagree with most of it. I do agree that some of the terminology is a little out dated. I do agree with the part that it does make a statement in a prayer part that says help me to show my parents how thankful I am they wanted me. I can see where that may be taken in a bad way. But I think the point is that a child can be grateful to God that He put in their parents' hearts the desire that they be their child. And that is not the same message as they should feel they owe something to their parents for having adopted them. I do not get that message at all from this book. I think the point is that it is trying to help the child see that adoption is a thing that is good and that the parents and the child can be thankful about. It also makes the analogy that we are all adopted by God. It may not be politically correct in all areas but the overall message I think is great! There's lots of room to get offended by terms for parents but I have never found kids to be so concerned about these terms. I think one statement here or there is not going to give them a feeling that they should be grateful we adopted them and be mindful of that every day. They get their feeling about adoption from us and our hearts on it. They know we feel we are the lucky ones. I think if you are afraid your kids will get that they should be grateful to have been adopted in a less than reasonable way then your problem is bigger than bad wording in a Christian kids book. And I personally am not offended by the term "natural parents" vs "birth parents". I do not think the term natural implies that adoption is not natural unless you have a chip on your shoulder. To me the distinction IS by nature vs parents by God. How hung up can we get on this stuff? I think as hung up as we are is as hung up as our kids will be. I personally want my kids to grow up not tripping over other peoples blunders on adoption terms and believing that most people really mean to be talking about adoption in the most loving terms but do not always know the lingo. Of course not, they have not experienced it. Why set your kids up to spend the rest of their lives offended all the time?

What it does do is talk about how adoption is a gift from God to the child and the parents. It talks about how an adopted child is chosen and how they can be adopted at all different ages. It talks about how we are all chosen by God and adopted into His family. It is pretty bold in talking about why kids are put up for adoption. If you have a problem with that message of adoption or you do not want your child to understand why they may have been put up for adoption then you will hate this book! But if that sounds like a good overall message (you can always can change terms that may offend you), it may be a good one for helping your kids to understand adoption in a loving and accepting way.

This is the first Christian adoption book that I have found, and I think that it is a wonderful book. If you are not a Christian you may not like it, but I think the message is clear. God brings a child and his/her adoptive parents together, and they make a family, and the child is loved forever. I am going to cherish this book for a long time, as my daughter from China is only 2 years old right now. I know when she is old enough to sit down and listen to a book of this length (good for kids ages 4-8, I'd say), then I know she will love it too. I don't think the book is outdated, and I am not offended by any terminology in it. I read the book to my 4 year old "natural" daughter, and she liked it alot. She understands that her little sister is adopted, and thinks that her sister will like the book someday too.

This second edition is just right for families who want to explain adoption to their children. I especially like that it puts the concept into the bigger picture -- that God adopts us as His own. It's gentle and affirming for little ones who may be anxious about their security. And the artwork is a great match to the text. I recommend it highly.

New artwork and new text make this a friendly read for all families of adoption. The book focuses on family life emphasizing that adoptive parents chose their children to love. Birth parents are recognized for their role in the child's life, but children are assured they will always be loved and cared for by their adopted parents. The message of God's love is weaved into the book beautifully and tenderly.

This title was originally published in 1987. This year the publisher released a 2nd Edition, an updated version that offers new illustrations and more contemporary wording and explanations.

The text provides a first person narrative of adoption from the perspective of a young girl. She tells readers that her parents are very special and she loves them very much. Long ago they were lonely because they had no children, but after talking with someone at the adoption agency, they chose her to be their child. The text explains that an adoption agency "knows where there are children who need families." The book goes on to answer several questions.

* Adopted children don't always look like their adoptive parents, but that's okay.
* Even adopted kids have to obey their parents. Just like other kids, they are corrected when they misbehave.
* Children can be adopted at different ages, some as babies and others as older kids.
* Children can be adopted for different reasons, some because their parents died; others because their parents couldn't care for them properly.
* The Bible talks about adoption, too! Esther and Moses were adopted, and God adopts all believers into His family.
* Adoption is permanent. Adoptive parents won't change their minds when their child gets older. Rather, the child is adopted and loved forever.

The illustrations by Janet McDonnell add much to the story. They feature a loving family - Caucasian parents and an Asian daughter - in strong watercolor.

WHAT I LIKE: This book answers so many questions! It tackles inquiries held by kids who have been adopted or who know others who have been adopted. It's fantastic. I like that it provides Bible references where relevant (Esther 2, John 15:16, Ephesians 1:4-5 and Galations 4:5). I like that it clearly makes the parallel between earthly adoption and spiritual adoption.

WHAT I DISLIKE: I would have liked stronger illustrations. These are nice, but there is nothing dynamic or exciting about them.

OVERALL RATING: Excellent.

Tanya -- Christian Children's Book Review

All children have a desire to hear how they became a part of their family. Children who are adopted provide parents with a unique opportunity to intentionally tell the story of how God brought mom, dad and child together.

"Adopted and Loved Forever" by Annetta E. Dellinger is a delightful chance to introduce children to the gift of how God works out his plans for our lives, as well as increase their own sense of belonging by seeing their story in print.

As with any adoption book some people love it and some do not. There is a constant conversation in the adoption community about terms such as "natural parents." Or do you show photos of a child who is the same ethnicity or different. Is the child born in the USA or another country? Does the child meet the parents at the airport in the USA or do the parents fly to the other country and pick the child up?

You will never find the perfect book that tells your child's story exactly as it is, which is why it is important to create an adoption scrapbook album or lifebook that does that. But other books on adoption like this are wonderful supplemental stories that share about the many ways adoption brings families together.

In comparison to a personalized lifebooks parents help put together (for example, LifeBooks : Creating a Treasure for the Adopted Child)or a book like the Adoption Scrapbook Baby Album that make a child feel "special," adoption books such as "Adopted and Loved Forever" remind a child that she or he is not alone--many families are made through this process called adoption and although they are special, they are not "weird" in any way. They are part of an amazing, blessed group of people who have changed our world.

As an adoptive mom I was elated to finally discover a book that so closely resembled our family's adoption story. Having it Christian- based is a wonderful bonus. It will quickly become a treasured book in our home.

As a student of world religions and having adopted interracially, I will not use this book about adoption with our child. The Christian overtone is strong, without discussion on acceptance of different families let alone religions. As a parent who would like to pass on the acceptance of all peoples, cultures and religions as different, not right or wrong, I would not recommend this book. A good alternative would be "Families are Different".

I agree with the majority of the reviews I have read. I am a Christian, and my toddler, whom we adopted from South Korea, loves his Bible stories. But this book seems to focus too much on religion and too little on how parents feel about their adopted children. I specifically did not like the line, "It makes me feel good to know that both Jesus and my parents forgive me." It does not specify what he or she is being forgiven for, and that could be confusing to a child. It almost sounds as if it is forgiveness for being adopted. If you are a fundamentalist Christian this may be the book for you. For everyone else I would pass on it.