Customer Reviews

Adoption is a Family Affair!: What Relatives and Friends Must Know

5 star:		(19)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(4)

 

 

This book is great to give to your relatives when you are considering adoption, are in the process of adopting, or have already adopted a child. It is easy to read, doesn't "talk down" to people, and has a lot of good information. I am giving copies of this book to my parents, mother-in-law, and grandmother! When we first started the adoption process, this book wasn't yet published and I wish it had been. I really wanted something for my close relatives to read so that they would understand what we were doing and also to help them relate to our daughter-to-be. I"m so glad this book is available now! It's not too late for them to benefit by reading it, that's for sure.

Hope you and your relatives enjoy the book also!

I was very concerned about some of the reviews of this book, it was either loved or hated. I kept coming back to it and decided to give it a chance. I am so glad I did! This book was insightful not only to the recipient, but to ME! If taken in stride, it needs to be understood that we (the adopters) need to consider where/how and why the feedback is being presented. It might not be packaged nicely and we might be a little sensitive hearing it - but this book worked magic for us. It was just what I had been searching for and did the trick. Everyone is different - I suggest giving the book a try, with an open mind. The content is great, easy to read and contains many informative sections - not presented in only one format or style. If one method does not get through the other does. I loved the scenarios given at the end about the stupid comments people can make - so true! Bless all of you adopters and your family - this is just one more step in our paper pregnancy!!!! Enjoy.

I enjoyed this book and it was invaluable in helping me educate extended family about adoption. The language is clear and concise, it speaks directly to the family members/friends of adoptive parents, and it addresses many of the concerns that family members or friends may have, regardless of whether they blurt it out or not.

As adoptive parents, we often spend hours poring over books, talking with others who have adopted, and researching our choice. Our extended family members often do not make the same educational journey we do, so it's helpful to have something to gently illustrate topics like adoption myths, respectful language, privacy for the child, etc.

I highly recommend it.

I received this book just yesterday and already I've read it twice. I've even marked my favorite passages for my in-laws and relatives to pay close attention to. This is a GREAT book for anyone affected by adoption. The information was presented well and in an easy to read format. I'm sure that after reading this my relatives who have been a little reserved about adoption will come to accept our decision and even enjoy our baby when s/he arrives. This is a MUST for anyone whose is having trouble getting their friends and family to be enthusiastic about adoption.

My mom was pretty hostile when my husband and I decided to adopt older children. She wanted us to have a baby or at least adopt one. We were really upset because we really could have used the support that a girl can only get from her mama. We found this book and gave her a copy. After she read it- her total attitude changed. Instead of talking about how she would never babysit for our kids and asking how we could give them back when we realised our mistake, now she is buying dolls for my little girl, stockpiling treats for grandmas house and passing their pictures around the office. This book is an easy and fast read that clearly acknowledges the very real concerns grandparents have when their child announces the adoption. But in a very gentle and understanding way sets the record straight and tells the reader exactly how to support their adoptive family member. This book is a must read. It covers all types of adoption- not just older child.

Yes, indeed, adoption is a family affair. This is an informative book, giving sound advice on many aspects of adoption to both the public and prospective adoptive parents, such as open vs. confidential adoption. The author doesn't push either practice and gives important references addressing each. She is informative and straightforward about the issue of infertility and has caught me, personally, in the rather stupid and offensive myth that adoptive parents, who relax after adopting, will get pregnant. I admit to having felt this way before we adopted and then I became so absorbed in our adopted infant daughter that I forgot about getting pregnant--and got pregnant. Well, it would have happened anyhow! I am now a grandparent with children of our adopted daughter and agree with the author that 'what makes a 'real' grandparent is far less biology than it is psychology.' I like the author's sensible advice that concern should not stop with the birthmother's prenatal care but be extended to the prospective adoptive parents health and their ability to cope with the demands of a new baby or toddler entering their lives. I also like the author's caution about keeping certain information regarding the child's background confidential so it won't turn into family gossip. Read this good book.
Gisela Gasper Fitzgerald, author of ADOPTION: An Open, Semi-Open or Closed Practice?

Adoption Is A Family Affair! What Relatives And Friends Must Know is specifically written to correct commonly held myths and misconceptions about adoption and adopters. One example is the wide spread myth that people often conceive after adopting because they then "relax" and things just happen naturally. The truth is that only 5% of those who adopt will spontaneously conceive after adopting -- the same percentage figure as for those infertile couples who do not adopt! Adoption Is A Family Affair! is very highly recommended reading for prospective adopters, and for their friends and family as well!

Although I'm sure that there are people out there who did not find it annoying to be talked down to, I did. So I have a hard time giving a book to my family when I find it condescending, myself. I don't think it will help my relationship with them to give them this book.

I thought the book was trite and a play on her other books. She tries to get mileage out of an old and tired concept. If you read her other books you don't need this one. Best suggestion is to use the library, not a book worth hanging on to

Simply put there are better books out there on adoption.

This is a wonderful book for any adoptive family. It really helps family members (aunts, uncles, grandparents) as well as friends understand the process and the entire experience. My family members who have read the book thought it was "great because there were questions answered that I didn't want to ask you, too embarrassing!"