Customer Reviews

Adult Children Secrets of Dysfunctional Families: The Secrets of Dysfunctional Families

5 star:		(16)
4 star:		(1)
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1 star:		(2)

 

 

This book appears at first to deal just with additctions. Further reading proves this book to be excellent reference for any individual suffering from depression, anxiety, childhood trauma and different kinds of abuse suffered during childhood. It explains how being an addict, depressed, anxious etc...are only symptoms of a dysfunctional family system. It will become easier to understand while reading this book why we are the way that we are. It offers comfort, insight, and the how to change if we so choose to. To me this book is the Bible that unlocks the secrets of the symptoms to my sometimes very difficult life.

This incredible book leads those of us in recovery from dysfunction to attempting normalcy. It is written specifically for those who have no idea what normalcy is. Our parents, who loved us, unknowly led us into a life that is lived without the skills to develop intimacy that is necessary for our closest relationships. The Friels explain our losses without blaming anyone and give concrete ways to help adult children recover their true selves.It explains how some of the most severe comditions of mental illness can be related to our dysfuncional families. Most of all it gives us hope for the future and for developing loving relationships.

Having read several books on the adult child isssue, I found this book to be the most straight forward and specific that I had read. This book explains the origins of the adult child, the process that can lead to addiction, and the personal work necessary to get to the root of the problem. While many books explain the symptoms and the cause of codependency, I found this book to also address what needs to been done to enter recovery. All this is accomplished is a very practical and easily read manner.

John and Linda Friel not only discuss dysfunctional families, but more importantly, they teach the secrets of functional families! This is a first. The reading is easy for all levels and ages. Even my sixteen year old daughter said that it was very interesting for "one of those kind of books". This book provides a plan to be implemented over time. The authors really speak to the heart. It has given me effective words and language to use in situations that I would not have had previously. I will use Adult Children as a reference for quite some time.

Illuminating and frightening. We all have baggage and until we find a place to safely store it, those closest to us are also burdened with it. The ideas in this book promote taking responsibility for our actions, looking into the motivations of those actions, and examining the source of our attitudes without placing blame on anyone. It's a great book about growing up to be healthy and facing one's demons without guilt. It's a relief to read this material and know that it's OK to feel a certain way, and even better to feel that healthy change is possible.

I just finished this book and I recommend it to anyone wanting a better understanding of what it means to be an Adult Child. If you are not sure you fall into this category, there are a few quizzes and questionaires that I thought did a good job of answering this question for me. Ive read other books on the subject, and this book did a good job of keeping the psychological babble to a minimum while making it educational and informative. The best thing I think it did was make me realize that I am sitll an adult child and where these issues possible stem from. I think it could have done better in exploring the different roles within a family structure. It definatly pushes 12-step groups and individual counseling which is a healthy next step with these kinds of issues. Its a great first read or refresher on this subject matter.

Excellent. A bit dated but timeless content. The beginning and end speaks to AA type meetings but it's not the main focus of the book, co-dependency is, which just about everyone deals with growing up. Quick read. There are a few short stories featuring animals that are sprinkled between the chapters, adding levity and a moment to escape and explore how the new information may serve you. My favorite, The Goose, whose parents told her not to leave the pond despite her feeling sick but she finally did leave and discovered she was right. The family unit unknowingly puts family members into positions and then keeps them there unable to see the dysfunction. Once one family member took action leaving the others behind the others eventually followed. If one family member is acting out and you don't know why it is not always the issue of the one who is acting out, look beyond, look to yourself first. Highly recommended.

This very well written books offers insights about who we are as a person and why we are the way we are. I found the book very comforting because it reinforced what I was feeling inside. This book also gives advice about how to change. I think that even if you don't come from an "abusive" family you should read this book because I know that everyone can relate and learn from it in many ways.

I bought a copy for all adult members of my family. We are each reading a few chapters before meeting and discussing what spoke to us personally. So far we are all impressed with the book. I'm hoping this will put us all on the same page before going in for family therapy if we feel it's needed.

This book has really put a lot of things in persepective for me. It tells me why my family is like the way they are and that it is not my fault they are at war with each other. It also has given me a view as to why my husband's family act like they do. It really does shed light on a lot of things about our families.