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Adventures of Samurai Cat

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"Tomokato turned, watching the sun's glaring disc begin to sink beneath a mountain-ridge. A chill breeze sprang up, stirring his whiskers. His paw clenched on the hilt of his katana, or long-sword. He wondered if he would ever see the light of day again, but he knew it did not matter. His lord had been cruelly, treacherously butchered. Fugu Otoko had had a hand in it, and Otoko had fled into the vast recesses of Catzad-Dum. Tomokato's soul ached with the lust for revenge. His slitted eyes seemed almost to smoke, like newly congealed obsidian. He smiled slightly, showing his wickedly pointed teeth. He was the very image of ferocious martial resolution.

"Just before the sun dipped from sight, a crow flew by, and was almost too awed by the sight of him to continue flapping.

" "What a stud!" the bird mumbled to himself, winging erratically southward."

So begins THE ADVENTURES OF SAMURAI CAT by Mark E. Rogers, the first in a series of at least six books about Miaowara Tomokato, the Most Perfect Samurai ever to whip out a katana, and his mischievous nephew Shiro, the most demented, blood-thirsty little fluff bunny ever to whip out a Johnson M1941 automatic rifle. Yep, that's where the ADVENTURE begins, the story itself started a few pages earlier when Tomokato defeated all 30,000 of Takeda Katsuyori's armed warrior's merely by stepping out from behind a screen and revealing himself. His mere presence had so terrified even the horses that they had stopped dead in their tracks causing a massive pile-up in which the entire attacking force had been killed. What a stud! As a reward Tomokato asks only to be allowed to visit his brother's family, a request which his lord grants since it is far too small a payment for the service Tomokato has rendered, but of course being a Perfect Samurai, he will accept nothing else.

This turns out to be a Bad Time for Tomokato to have left court, however, for in his absence Lord Nobunaga was assassinated by what may have been the largest and most diverse group in recorded in history. Upon returning and finding everyone dead, The Cat, with the assistance of his Lord's severed head which is very talky considering its present state, compiles a list of the names and address of everyone involved in the murder. It includes, but is not limited to; Cossacks, Apaches, Al Capone, Vikings, Nazis, Stalin, Mongols, and Martians. It also includes Fugo Otoko, the Blowfish Who Never Smiles mentioned in the openning quotation. When asked about the large number of out of towners on the list Nobunaga explaines that he had travelled a lot when he was a teenager.

I first encountered SAMURAI CAT and his creator Mark Rogers at the New Orleans World Science Fiction Convention in 1989, I think. He was giving a slide show and a telk in one of the panel rooms and the phrase "samurai cat" caught my eye and intrigued me. The slides were of his artwork for the third book in the series SAMURAI CAT IN THE REAL WORLD in which The Cat tracks down those who responsible for his Lord's death to Nazi Germany and Stalinist Russia. All of the books are heavily illustrated. I suspect that The Cat may have started out life as a visual concept and then evolved into a literary one. As it turned out Rogers was giving a reading from the third book that night in his room and all were invited. Cool.

I made a point of showing up, I just had to find out what these stories were like after having seen photos of T-Rex's in Gestapo uniforms being cut to very bloody pieces by an orange cat wearing lamellar armor and weilding a katana! A lot of other fen showed up as well, maybe 40 which is a goodly number for a regular sized hotel room. The door to his room was actually propped open but Rogers himself was nowhere to be seen. Gradually we all inched our way into the room and decided to wait in there, we were about 10 minutes early. So we waited. And waited. Then at about 5 minutes after the appointed hour Rogers staggered into room. He was out of breath and his face was the oddest shade of red I've ever seen. He really looked as if He was going to keel over. The elevators had been jammed with people so he had decided to run up all 34 flights of stairs so he wouldn't miss the reading!

I'm so glad I stayed, and equally glad that Rogers didn't stroke out that night! He had 3 more books to write. The story was wonderful, and I finally managed to getsome closure for the JFK assassination! But that's another book.

THE ADVENTURES OF SAMUAI CAT is simply put, a classic of comic genius.

It plumbs new depths of genial idoicy and will ultimately leave you knowing far more about assorted heavy weaponry than you ever imagined you would. If you're a fan of absurdist humor and don't mind having some/all of fandom's sacred cows lampooned you'll be in your element. Rogers takes on just about everyone and everthing fannish in this series, including (at the end) his own fans. Ouch. In the first book Tomokato ventures first into Tolkein country and encounters D&D gamers as well as the great winged demon B'aalhop. Then its on to the village of Outsmouth and the Real Old God K'Chu. There's Con-Ed the Barbarian, and his deadly foe Thpageti-Thoth and all sorts of other exciting and silly characters to be sliced and diced before The Cat finds himself in Asgard facing RAGNAROK!

I can't imagine having to live in a world devoid of Samurai Cat! As science fiction writer Robert Jordan said, ""The Cat Is marvelously funny and maniacally adventurous, turning every science fiction convention on its ear. I want to be Miaowara Tomokato when I grow up."

Me too.

This book is the first and best in the series, and contains the following sections:

KATEMUSHA
---------
In feudal Japan, loyal samurai Miaowara Tomokato returns from a family visit to find his lord dead in a scene of destruction that's completely spoiled me for similar scenes forever. Maybe it's the arrow-ridden dragon in Red Army uniform, or the landgoing replica of the Merrimac.

"From his vantage-point Takeda Katsuyori surveyed the grim scene. 'Fudge," he gritted."

THE BRIDGE OF KATZAD-DUM
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Samurai Cat pursues one of his lord's killers into Tolkien country, dealing with such critters as porks and the dread B'aalhop.

"The katana whirred and flamed, slicing through tentacle after tentacle, whistling in a constantly repeated *Datsun Tempura*, or Divine Whirling Outboard Motor Propeller Blow."

THE BOOK OF THE DUNWICH COW
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The setting: a Lovecraftian town whose houses consist only of gabled attics to hide the squamous half-human denizens of Outsmouth.

"Yog N'goggawoggah and Yoknapatawpha, twin masses of stone-cold cream chip beef that ooze sluggishly in the center of all time and space, are their chiefs, terrible in combat, unappetizing to behold. Their herald and messenger is Stor-Atroomtemp, Lord of the Luke-warm, Cosmic Blight, Master-of-Many-Shapes-and-Interesting-in-None-of-Them. Their publicity is handled by the horrendous Isaac Azathoth...."

BEYOND THE BLACK WALNUT
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Another murderer, Thpageti-Thoth, has fled into savage Pictland. Illustrated in gorgeous Frazetta parodies, the story shows Samurai Cat's meeting with Con-Ed the Barbarian.

"Amalric the East Anglian..., armored in a scale-mail corselet, was a tall weasly-looking teenager whose spiky hairdo sent orange and purple tufts up through the holes he had deliberately punched in his own helmet. His only weapon was a gigantic Wilkinson sword razor-blade with the words 'Hi Mum' written on it in crimson lipstick."

AGAINST THE GODS
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Tomokato's search takes him next to Asgard, as the gods prepare for the final war against the giants of the Greater Jotunheim Co-Prosperity Sphere.

"Odin nodded his grimly regal head and picked up the microphone for his P.A. system. 'Attention, attention,' he began. 'This is Odin, Lord of the Hanged. Ketil Jormunreksson, report to the Throne-Room, on the double.'"

This book is a must.

I read this book about 6 times in a row as a kid...the title page fell out because it had been read so much and I framed it and put it on my wall! I really wish it was still in print...please let me know if it becomes available. It is definately a world I'd like to revisit.

For those not familiar, this epic is basically Xena, warrior princess combined with Fritz the Cat . It's better than football on monday nights, and more American than Buddha. I firmly believe that by carefully following the maps, one can find the Author's favorite diner on Route 13 in Delaware.

I met Mark Rogers 15+ years ago at BaltiCon, back when Samarai Cat was first being created. In addition to his writings and his art, Mark is also a wonderful dramatic _storyteller_. It was really great to see him get recognized and published. Our 12 year old cat is named 'Shiro' after Miaowara's outrageous Nephew (oh hello, Uncle!). I've never caught back up with Mark, but I feel as if it still was yesterday as I've seen his family of characters grow and develop as each books' stories have unfolded. Just don't make the mistake of loaning these books out to anyone but your closest friends...you'll end up like me, trying to find hard and out of print titles (and the signed 1st Edition is obviously hopeless). A Fantasy lover's collection has to have a sense of humor when looking at itself, so if you liked what the "Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy" did for SF or PDQ Bach's fun with Classical Music, you'll love the fun that Mark pokes at the all-often-too-grandious medium of Fantasy writings. Mark's works plant the tongue firmly in cheek and bites down with amazing wit. Read this book alone so as to not embarass yourself with your gigglesnorts.

This is definitely an excellent book. I have read both this and Samurai Cat Goes to the Movies and have found both to be hilarious and highly enteraining. While often very wierd it is a great book which I would highly recommend.

This book from page one was going to be a cult classic. Samuri Cat is modern day embodiment of antiestablishment. Rogers has crafted a story that you hate to see end. He attacks the mainstream with a piercing wit that can only be appreciated by the sickest minds.

This is without a doubt the best book I ever bought, since it introduced me to the world of Samurai Cat. Rogers is without a doubt one of the funniest men alive. Mix creative anachronism with parody, throw in a little satire and wide reading knowledge, add a liberal dose of insane humor, and you've got Samurai cat. A must read!

I can honestly say these books (there is five in the series) are the best books I have ever read. My advice? Search them out and find them (I know I have all five in my personal library!). YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED.