Customer Reviews

Affairs: Emergency Tactics

5 star:		(7)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

Most books, and most people, take a position on affairs-either you stay and work it out no matter what, or you leave with no going back. This may be the first book to talk about both options. She tells the reader how to determine if there is an affair; how to avoid spur-of-the-moment actions (or acting out and decisions that could have grave repercussions for you; how to determine which of the three types of affairs it is (two you leave, one you stay in her opinion); and then how you recover from the whole thing. Nothing will be easy, but there are ways to help you cope and to create a life as you want it. I wish no one would ever have to read this book, but if you're in this situation, this should be your bed-side companion.

Would you board a ship if there were no lifeboats or life preservers? Of course not. Then why not make sure you're fully protected in your relationship, too. How? Buy and read Affairs: Emergency Tactics. Dr. Rhodes' excellent, practical, down-to-earth, nuts-and-bolts guide is for every person who is hi--or might be hit--by the disaster of a suddenly discovered partner's affair. It's required reading for women and men who want to protect themselves from the emotional damage of an affair and use it instead as an opportunity to rebuild their lives. I found the section on the different kinds of affairs particularly helpful. Dr. Rhodes enables you to understand what happened, gives you the information to figure out what to do, and empowers you to do it. A winner, from beginning to end.

This book takes you through a step by step process on how to determine and then how to handle yourself and the relationship with an unfaithful partner. "Affairs" gives you instructions on what to do and what not to do - the latter being just as important as the former.

I only wish I had had this book when I went through my divorce. It would have made things so much clearer and I might not have needed to go through the nightmare for almost two years.

I highly recommend "Affairs".

In the age of degredation we find today, it is very enlightening to find and know there are people like Dr. Rhodes, who care. This book covers a wide range of potential problems and helpful thought out solutions to guide you through a repairing process of a marriage, with the entire family considered. It is not one sided or biased in any way. The insight shown and the love put into this carefully thought out book could be an inspiration to so many. It is reading that should be done by all couples, not just those who are already having an affair. It shows great incite as to what can become a problem and I think therefore it could help stop the problem before it happens. I wish this would have been available years ago. I was with an unfaithful wife and stayed in a marriage destined for nowhere and without love, till the day my wife died.

I and other professionals who have read this book like the author and want to advise other potential readers that AFFAIRS is an extremely well organized and lucid book.I would recommend this book to anyone who finds out that his or her spouse is involved in an affair. I particularly liked the way Rhodes gives "advice" or should I say, organizes information.

The introduction contains a clearly stated point of view, which speaks directly to the reader in a way that imparts good information and is both positive and hopeful. Rhodes' firm recomendations against impulsive action will save folks a lot of grief if they pay heed to her advice. The case studies were very interesting and highly instructive. They demonstrate and dramatize the rationale for each of the authors suggestions. Four stars and a bravo! for his book. M.Blonsky

Renee DeCartes once stated, "It is not good enough to have a good mind, you must use it well". I believe this book is an example of a great mind working to create a fertile world where growth and development is available regardless of the circumstances at any particular point in time. This book provides the step by step format necessary to make that emotional journey to a successful destination: reconciliation or divorce. Dr. Rhodes provides insightful guidelines to assist you maintain your dignity and arrive at your destination with a greater sense of self than when first confronted with the AFFAIR. In my opinion, this book is a reference for any person who wondered how a trained professonal (psychotherapist) would handle the affair crisis. Furthermore, this book takes the reader from emotional upheavel to integrating rational thought with his or her emotionsso you can do the best you can, with each aspect of your being, at any given point in time, during an affair crisis. Absolutely Superb!!!

I wavered between two and three stars, and finally went with three because this book does, in truth, address a specific market with specific needs for specific information. The author makes some very valid points and certainly, when one's world is reeling after the discovery of an extra-marital affair, some good, sound advice is exactly what is needed.

BUT... the sounds advice does not need to be repeated and repeated and repeated. Make the point, give an example, and move on.

The most annoying thing about this book, however, is the very poor editing. It is difficult, in fact, to believe that this is the "revised edition" as it is replete with typographical errors. I found the fonts (there are far too many variations of italics, size, boldness) distracting as well -- a good graphics page designer could make this work much more appealing and readable, and a good editor could tighten up the content. The work would benefit and so would its audience.

A comprehensive, eye opening study, that will hit home. At first you look around the bookstore to make sure that no one sees you take the book off of the shelf (with a title like this, you wouldn't want anyone to think that YOU or anyone you know could possibly have a problem). As you peruse the pages, you are struck with the gentle no nonsense style and understanding that Dr. Rhodes exhibits throughout the book. Suddenly, you are through the checkout line, at home, reading, and more important, for the first time, YOU ARE READY TO DO SOMETHING POSITIVE ABOUT THE PROBLEM!

Inside the book cover reads "Dr. Rhodes and Dr. Goldner are available for personal coaching".
Dr. Norman Goldner is married to Dr. Carol Rhodes. Dr. Rhodes gives credit to her husband for ideas, ... in the book.

I happen to have had the unfortunate experience of Dr. Goldner as a marriage counselor in Rochester MI. He would have major impulsive anger outbursts over such trivial issues. He is a very huge man together with his anger management issues, he was quite intimidating as a marriage counselor. From that encounter, Dr. Goldner as a marriage counselor brings to mind an expression of "the Odd studying the ID".

There are few things that are as destructive as adultery and if you're the one who is being betrayed, you need good advice fast. That's what you'll find in Dr. Rhodes' book. Good advice. Fast! Get it, read it. Then take care of yourself.