Customer Reviews

Alcatraz Versus The Evil Librarians

5 star:		(42)
4 star:		(13)
3 star:		(6)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(5)

 

 

First off, I should say that in my mid twenties I am a little older than the target "reading level" of this book. However, that didn't stop me from thoroughly enjoying every word of it. I am a big fan of Brandon Sanderson, and am glad to see that his writing skill can equally please readers of all ages.

Alcatraz Versus The Evil Librarians is the most cleverly written book I have ever had the pleasure of reading. The precisely written narration is what I enjoyed the most. Each chapter, Alcatraz (the narrator) breaks away from the story, to talk to the reader from the voice of the author. These little sections are filled with really clever tidbits that on many occasions had me laughing out loud.

The story itself is entertaining as well. True to Sanderson's form, some of the characters have a special magical "talent" that they use in very creative ways. These talents are attributes that we might not normally see as an advantage, such as always arriving late, and tripping and falling in very dramatic ways. Sanderson also does a great job sheding new light on the world we live in by comparing it to a more advanced society where light bulbs are inferior to open flames (since lights can't set things on fire) and stairs are more advanced than elevators (because you get a work out climbing them).

This is a book that I think any kid will love, with the parents enjoying it equally as much.

Alcatraz at first glance appears to be your typical teen-age boy, even if he's named after a world-famous prison. Being passed around the foster-care system hasn't helped his attitude much, though, and it seems that he brings it on himself with his terrible clutziness.

On his thirteenth birthday he gets a strange--and very old--package in the mail from his father (where is he? is he dead? is he alive? we don't know?) claiming that it contains Alcatraz's inheritance: a bag of sand. Mystified and sad, he decides to make himself some comfort food but accidentally catches the kitchen drapes on fire.

Then everything hits the fan: the sand is stolen, a man claiming to be his grandfather shows up, his foster mother wants to kick him out of the house, and a man with a gun threatens his life. Not a great way to spend a birthday, if you ask me.

But, oh, what hilarity ensues. What's great about Sanderson's stuff is that it's beyond the typical fantasy-epic-journey type story like you'd find in Paolini or MacHale. Almost the entire story takes place at the downtown library, where things aren't always what they seem. And nothing is off-limits: Sanderson makes fun of everything and it's just plain funny. Exceedingly silly, but funny for kids and grown-ups.

The characters are fun, and even the antagonists turn out to be complex people. Alcatraz in particular is an interesting character who struggles with his accident-prone nature, until he learns it's a 'Talent' (his grandfather's Talent is arriving late to things...it's so funny, but it works!). He's convinced he's a bad kid, but it gets harder for us to believe it as the story progresses, and even he seems to change his mind a little near the end.

Sanderson's strength, as in his other novels, is his plotting. He knows how to tell a story at a great pace, that moves forward and never lags. The author is also great with magic. He finds new ways to make magic just plain cool, like the Allomancers in The Final Empire (Mistborn, Book 1). In Alcatraz the protagonists have their Talents (his cousin's Talent is tripping), but they are also Occulators--that is, many of their powers come from the eye-glasses they wear! How cool is that?! Having worn glasses all throughout my childhood, the idea of them giving superpowers is cooler than cool.

Alcatraz would be great to read out loud to your kids (I'd say ages 9-12), and you won't be bored in the process!

I loved the movie "The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension" and know other people who loved it just as much as me. But I also know a number of people who just didn't get it. This book is that kind of tale. It has bits and pieces of everything: magic, foster parents, dinosaurs, librarians, author-asides, a very clever last page, maniacal characters, cliffhangers galore, and even more. Once I got into the 3rd chapter I was absorbed whole-heartedly into the rhythm of the storytelling, and raced through to the end. My 6th grade son and I have had some fascinating conversations about the book, and both enjoy talking about things my wife and younger son know nothing about.

Rutabaga!

One of the funnest books I have ever read. This is a very smart book, it is very well written, and had me laughing out loud several times (that is a rare occasion for me).

Not only is this book blatantly funny, but there are a lot of small jokes that are hidden amongst the lines that are a delight to find.

Very good read, well worth the price of a hardcover copy.

I write this under the pen name of book reviewer Alex C. Telander, so I can keep the librarians happy and unsuspecting. If you're reading this, then you must've heard about the supposed "fictional" book, Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians. Good for you! You have taken the first step to learning the truth.

This book isn't really by Brandon Sanderson, it's a cover for the true story and biography of Alcatraz Smedry. In this first book in the series you'll learn about Alcatraz and why he's always breaking everything he touches. It's because that's his special power. In fact he thought he was an orphan - yeah, like Harry Potter - only turns out he was just being protected. On his thirteenth birthday - after burning the kitchen down because he broke the stove - he gets a bag of sand as a gift from the parents he never knew he had, an inheritance, and it get stolen. His grandfather appears from nowhere and just rescues him in time - his special ability is that he arrives late for everything, really handy when you're being shot at.

Alcatraz soon finds out that the world isn't what he thinks it is, that there's other places he never knew existed, but it's all because of those evil librarians; they're behind everything. They've pulled the wool over our eyes for a long time, but if you're reading this, then maybe you'll read Alcatraz's story and find out what the truth is. The evil librarians control everything, but it's up to Alcatraz along with help from his family and an appointed bodyguard, a girl who's a knight of the Crystallia, to try and stop these librarians and get that important bag of sand back. Because the sand can be used to make lenses which have special powers, and this sand will make a lens that can read any language, even the ancient language which nobody knows how to read.

So now you've read this fake book review about a fictional book called Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians by Brandon Sanderson, go out and get the book at any bookstore - avoid the library, `cos that's where the evil librarians are - and find out what the real world is like. Think The Matrix, only better!

If you liked this review and are interested in purchasing this book, click here.

Originally written on July 18th 2009 ©Alex C. Telander.

For an interviews with Brandon Sanderson, go to[...]

The book is clever. I mean, really clever. The tone is Lemony Snickett crossed with Buckaroo Banzai. There were times when I laughed out loud and forced my husband to listen to an excerpt - specifically the veiled allusion in the last chapter, and also the authorial aside about books that you "should" read where boys have dogs that die. I'd recommend this book to people of all ages! I've already lent it to my nephew.

Of course, would I really expect anything else from Brandon Sanderson? He continually amazes me as an author, and I'd rank him as in my top three favorite writers of all times.

I'm looking forward to the release of the others in the series!

This book was so fun to read. There is so much humor, and Brandon really has a way of bringing out these quirky, off the wall jokes that just make you laugh (I love somewhat random humor, rutabaga, and so it made me enjoy this book even more). I love the Author's Foreword that talks about how this book really wasn't written by Brandon Sanderson, but rather by Alcatraz Smedry, but his "Hushlander" editor required him to have a pseudonym. I love all the "talents" the family members have, which seem not so much like talents at all, and how Brandon cleverly turned them into amazing abilities.

Also, I love how Alcatraz, writing this years after the events, keeps trying to convince you that he's a bad person and not a hero, as everyone thinks. (Not that anyone is convinced of this.) This does feel overdone at times, but it's the only real flaw I saw in this book.

Overall it's just a really fun book and I look forward to the whole series.

A librarian friend of mine was actually the one to recommend this series to me, after telling her about my students pushing through all of the Alex Rider series and looking for something along the same lines. I finally picked it up and it was a lot more than I expected. Sam has the power to break things, which isn't something good and is the cause of him moving from one foster home to another. When an old man claiming to be his grandfather shows up and tells him that this is a skill that is great, he's right to be skeptical. Of course, there's also the fact that his grandfather believes there are evil Librarians ruling this world and that there is another world out there.

I really loved this book. It was funny, magical and full of adventure. And even though it shows librarians as evil.. well I have no qualms to saying librarians could one day rule the world. Definitely a great start to a new series that I think my students will love.

Below is an excerpt of my full review of the first four books in the Alcatraz series:

This review goes in line with that of the Alcatraz series, more specifically the attitude of a Smedry. You see, they are trouble makers, and are prone to getting themselves into life threatening situations. They have an uncharacteristic attitude when dealing with any situation. The more danger, the more excited they are. Through thick and thin, Smedry's are rarely to be found with a sour mood. They are bubbly, charismatic, bold, audacious, and have a knack for getting themselves into trouble. Wait, I said that did I not? Gack! You see, I imitating a number of characters found in this book. Granpa Smedry, Alcatraz, talking dinosaurs. Yes, you read correctly, talking dinosaurs with a British accent, and as we know, those Brits are refined, calm, and well-mannered; dinosaurs are no exception! They really know how to cause trouble for Librarians, like eating the entire C section of the Science Fiction shelf and moving six books out of their proper places. Okay, so maybe they are useless as Bastille said... The only thing worse than talking dinosaurs are talking rocks, but I tell you, the dinosaurs are a treat! To round off this paragraph, I leave you this quote from Grandpa Smedry if you think I am making any of this up:

I am a Smedry, and we do ridiculous, unexpected, eccentric things like this all the time.

The Alcatraz series is a tremendously fun read. My friend that recommended Mistorn and Elantris did not bother giving these books a shot because of their young adult emphasis, despite being a lover of Sanderson's work. Aspiring Asimovs, what a horrible reason! Lots of fun, many laugh out loud moments, tons of humor and wit, with a great story to boot! The books are written from the first person perspective of Alcatraz Smedry, written as a biography of how he became the hero of the Free Kingdom and to dispel the many myths about how it happened. The books are much shorter than all of Sanderson's other works, easily read in two or three days, and are extremely enjoyable. I cannot recommend these books enough!

Unfortunately Scholastic decided to not sign Sanderson for the fifth and final book. According to his assistant via Twitter, Sanderson will finish the series, but it's still a few years out, which is a shame. When I found out about this, I shook my fist at Scholastic and demanded they be burned alive with the Firebringer's Lens. You'll have to read the books to know what that's about ;)

I looked into this series because I am a big fan of Sanderson's work. At 28 years old I found the book amusing and enjoyable and now I really enjoy reading my daughter a chapter every night before bed. I will be getting the rest of this series without a doubt and I am very happy that there are quality family fantasy options like this so we can enjoy them together.

The story is about a boy with a talent for breaking things that always seems to get him kicked out of his foster homes. Little did he know that his talent is actually a family inheritance and an extremely powerful Talent at that. In this book Alcatraz gets to meet his grandfather and discover his past as well as learn about a vast conspiracy that is hiding all kinds of knowledge. All of the Talents shared by his family are amusing and would be considered flaws by most, but in the hands of their family they become powerful tools to fight against those that would control all the knowledge in the world.

Check this book out if you have kids and want to find a series that you can enjoy as a family or that they can get through themselves.