For All Our Daughters: Five Essentials to Help Young Women & Girls Master the Art of Growing Up [Paperback]

Pegine Echevarria (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: May 25, 1998

At last, the one how-to book that helps any woman impact the lives of young women and girls in a positive way.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

The opening chapter of For All Our Daughters ticks off a hair-raising list of troubles all too common among American girls ages 9 to 18. These crises range from eating disorders and unexpected pregnancies to suicidal feelings and abuse. Author Pegine Echevarria, a social worker whose childhood held more than its fair share of horrors, doesn't dally over bad news, though. Instead she surges forward to propose ways caring women can string safety nets beneath girls who are traumatized or bent on high-wire acts of destruction. Underpinning this mentoring plan is the author's assurance that however much you might like to think that your daughter tells you everything, she probably doesn't... and one day she certainly won't. "It's part of the maturing process for your daughter to stop turning to parents when faced with certain challenges," Echevarria says. For All Our Daughters offers an inspiring--and achievable--blueprint for building community and making a difference in someone's life. Though written for American girls, many of its suggestions are applicable to the stresses of life in other places--and for boys as well. --Francesca Coltrera

From Booklist

For girls between the ages of 9 and 18, relationships with adult women other than their mothers can make a critical difference in the often difficult and confusing transition to womanhood. Echevarria provides wonderful insights for moms, as well as a pragmatic guide for women who are or want to become mentors. Based on her experience as youth counselor, mother, and mentor, this inspiring book offers concrete suggestions for providing guidance and good modeling in five crucial areas of development: physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and financial accountability. Although the specific ideas offered may not always be appropriate, or even feasible, for every situation, they are sufficient in both number and variety and will inspire creative thinking about other imaginative solutions. Echevarria stresses that although a mentor will never replace a mother, she serves a vital role in a girl's maturation, through nonjudgmental listening and in helping explore opportunities for growth. Mentors model human resilience and resourcefulness, rather than perfection, and can show firsthand how responsible adults handle difficult situations. Grace Fill

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Product Details

• Paperback: 228 pages
• Publisher: Chandler House Press (May 25, 1998)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 188628413X
• ISBN-13: 978-1886284135
• Product Dimensions: 8.8 x 6.1 x 1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,482,627 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars A clear step-by-step guide for women helping young girls., January 21, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: For All Our Daughters: Five Essentials to Help Young Women & Girls Master the Art of Growing Up (Paperback)

Pegine Echevarria's For all Our Daughters: How Mentoring Helps Young Women and Girls Master the Art of Growing Up, is a clear step-by-step guide for women interested in helping young girls develop through childhood and adolescence. The book highlights 13 crises that virtually all girls must endure in modern times including teenage sex, contraception, pregnancy, smoking, drinking, depression, eating disorders, parental conflict, self-loathing, physical abuse, sexual pressure, and date rape. Echevarria outlines five areas that mentors must be sensitive to when guiding young girls through or around these crises:

1) Physical Development: Engage in some physical activity with your mentee. This will induce conversation about physical development and sexuality, while also fostering healthy body image and goal setting skills.

2) Intellectual development: Engage mentee in discussion of current political issues, art, travel, history, theater, and mathematics. Offer career advice, identify internships and support groups, and promote learning as a lifelong, enjoyable endeavor.

3) Emotional Development: Discuss emotional crises that mentee may experience or be experiencing. Encourage her to reach out for help when needed, identify healthy interchange, model beneficial "venting", and stress anger management.

4) Spiritual Development: Help mentee develop a sense of gratitude for friends, family, talents, gifts, and God. Encourage her to volunteer for worthy causes, take moments of silence, define her religion, establish her beliefs and values, and have faith.

5) Financial Accountability: Stress financial responsibility including: balancing a checkbook, starting a savings plan, opening an IRA, meeting with a financial planner, setting financial goals, making a monthly budget, getting appropriate insurance, knowing credit rating, giving to charity, and learning the art of negotiation.

These five major points are invaluable to any mentor. I especially valued the section on financial accountability, for in addition to its obvious objectives, this advice teaches independence, goal setting, and negotiating strategies. I feel these skills are most important in the maturation process.

The sole problem I had with the book was Echevarria's occasional pollyannishness about being a mentor. From her social work experience, Echevarria relates a story about a 14-year-old girl assigned to her, who came from drug-addled criminal parents that neglected the girl. Encouraging the waif to join her in building a collage of pictures cut from Seventeen magazine, Echevarria wins over the reluctant youth who is soon giggling and glue-covered, and opening herself up to her mentor. There is never a failed mentorship in the book or advice on how to cope with that possibility.

Nonetheless, Echevarria's book is an excellent primer for any mentor for it includes step-by-step lessons on how to counsel young people and creative ideas to build relationships of trust, openness and frank communication.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Every woman should read this book., May 28, 1998

By 

Laura Donnelly (New York City) - See all my reviews

This review is from: For All Our Daughters: Five Essentials to Help Young Women & Girls Master the Art of Growing Up (Paperback)

I'm a mentor in NYC and when I began I focused on helping my girl with academics. We also are active in sports, but there were other essentials I was overlooking like being an emotional or spiritual mentor. The book is an excellent guide to become a whole mentor. Echevarria is also speaking from the gut - she has mentored and recognizes the great mentors that influenced her. She gives us something real to change things with - I recommend this book to ALL of my female friends.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Heard her speak and love her book, November 4, 2002

By A Customer

This review is from: For All Our Daughters: Five Essentials to Help Young Women & Girls Master the Art of Growing Up (Paperback)

I had the oppourtunity to hear Pegine speak on mentoirng and leadership. WOW! She was amazing. If she comes to your town go to hear her. I wanted to learn more so I brought the book.

I have two nieces. After reading the book found myself thinking about activities I can be doing with them. She writes in a easy to read manner that woke me up. I learned about myself. I am going to do for myself things that I never did. Open myself up to new experiences.

This book is wonderful. I highly recommend it.