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Almost Royalty: A Romantic Comedy...of Sorts [Kindle Edition]

Courtney Hamilton
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (45 customer reviews)

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Kindle Price: $6.99
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  • Length: 306 pages (estimated)
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Book Description

“A hilarious, scathing tale of LA life.” -- Kirkus Reviews

Courtney Hamilton is a Velveeta-loving attorney driven to distraction by a city that seethes with soul-sucking status seekers. When her friend Marcie formulates an impossibly detailed rating system for acceptable men—the Los Angeles Eco-Chain of Dating—Courtney goes on a self-destructive binge that doesn’t stop until she gets thrown out of group therapy for insulting a former child actress.

Courtney is mortified as she watches her best friends give up stellar careers in law and the arts to marry entertainment royalty and civilian overachievers. Worse, they expect Courtney to do the same. So they hatch plots to get her to give up her career, break her addiction to fake cheese, marry into high-orbit wealth and rule the stratosphere alongside them.

But Courtney resists. She doesn’t want to be a poster child for the Opt-Out Generation. And she certainly doesn’t want to be molded into date bait for the top rung of L.A. society. All Courtney wants is to be left alone so she can search beneath the surface for a meaningful life. But between a meddling, narcissistic mother, a self-absorbed therapist and friends trying to send her to dating re-education camps, it seems that fake cheese is the only genuine thing left in the city. Social ambition combats self-actualization in this biting tale of one woman’s search for certainty in a city full of mirages.


                      Rave Reviews For This Hilarious Best Seller in the Women’s Fiction Category.



Tina Avon - Bookshipper
“This book was hilarious and wonderful at the same time.”

Theresa Ramcharan
5 stars. “I was sorry when the book ended and I hope there's a sequel!”

Debbie - Bookish
“So laugh out loud funny, I couldn't put this one down!”

Jill Knapp – Harper Impulse/Harper Collins Author of Chase
“UH-MAZING…Never have I laughed so hard while reading a book. I would recommend this book to anyone who likes comedy.”

Amanda's Daily Grind
"... I loved this book! I love that it didn’t fit the mold of my normal chick-lit fare..."

KKM Reads Blog
"Loved the story . . . Courtney giving her friends the what-for about how they treat her and act was priceless."

Ange’s Reviews - Goodreads
"The book is very well-written.. I would definitely recommend this book for other women who enjoy a little social commentary or humor."

Linda Quick Reviews
"I thoroughly enjoyed the book and would recommend it to anyone seeking a non-traditional chick lit read."

Mayda Reviews - Goodreads
“Pour a glass of your favorite white wine, get some Velveeta nachos, and settle down with this book. It’s time well spent.”

Emily Yinger
“A good book will make me cry. A good book will teach me things without my knowledge. A good book can be subtle and bold and crazy all at once. This was a good book.”

About the Author

Courtney Hamilton has worked in Hollywood with writers, directors, executive producers, actresses and actors in the entertainment industry in L.A., Las Vegas and New York, including Golden Globe and Emmy winners in television and feature films (particularly in the humorous fiction, humor romance and women’s fiction genres). Based in Los Angeles, California, Hamilton is a keen observer of L.A. Royalty and southern California society (which many consider a romantic fiction of its own). Almost Royalty is a fictionalized satire of Los Angeles social classes and especially those who aspire to be part of the city’s A-Level Royalty.

Sit. Read. Have some Velveeta. Enjoy. Laugh.


Editorial Reviews

Review

Kirkus Reviews
"A hilarious, scathing tale of LA life."


Midwest Book Review, D. Donovan
"Best friends facing adulthood and an elite Los Angeles atmosphere also face the consequences of being 'almost royalty' in their attitudes - all but one (the protagonist), who observes (as an outsider) the ironies of nouveau riche thinking and turns these viewpoints into hilarious dialogue that successfully nails the fallacies inherent in unspoken class systems and ideals of royalty among celebrities and non-celebrities alike...


That Hamilton achieves this through precise plays on words is further evidence of her skills at blending social observation and romance with fun injections of humor."


Jill Knapp - Harper Impulse/Harper Collins Author of Chase
"UH-MAZING...Never have I laughed so hard while reading a book. I would recommend this book to anyone who likes comedy."


Tina Avon - Bookshipper
"This book was hilarious and wonderful at the same time."

Theresa Ramcharan
5 stars. "I was sorry when the book ended and I hope there's a sequel!"

Debbie - Bookish

"So laugh out loud funny, I couldn't put this one down!"


Amanda's Daily Grind
"... I loved this book! I love that it didn't fit the mold of my normal chick-lit fare..."

KKM Reads Blog

"Loved the story . . . Courtney giving her friends the what-for about how they treat her and act was priceless."

Ange's Reviews - Goodreads
"The book is very well-written.. I would definitely recommend this book for other women who enjoy a little social commentary or humor." 


Mayda Reviews - Goodreads
"Pour a glass of your favorite white wine, get some Velveeta nachos, and settle down with this book. It's time well spent.

About the Author

Courtney Hamilton has worked in Hollywood with writers, directors, executive producers, actresses and actors in the entertainment industry in L.A., Las Vegas and New York, including Golden Globe and Emmy winners in television and feature films (particularly in the humorous fiction, humor romance and women’s fiction genres). Based in Los Angeles, California, Hamilton is a keen observer of L.A. Royalty and southern California society (which many consider a romantic fiction of its own). Almost Royalty is a fictionalized satire of Los Angeles social classes and especially those who aspire to be part of the city’s A-Level Royalty. Sit. Read. Have some Velveeta. Enjoy. Laugh.

Product Details

  • File Size: 931 KB
  • Print Length: 306 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 098372671X
  • Publisher: Forrest Thompson Publishers (May 28, 2014)
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B00KN1H71Q
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #64,193 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
Format:Kindle Edition
Buy this book to read! It's a must-read, must-have! This book is a great satirical comedy of sorts based upon her friends' lists of the how-to's in LA. It gets even better as you read on! Even though funny, I'm not talking slap-stick funny, but funny in the right places.
Meet Courtney Hamilton, no, not the author! A character in the story! (There you go! What author uses her own name as a character in a book?!!) She is single, a Litigation Attorney, and dating in LA. Among her friends, Courtney cannot be herself, but is expected to follow the 'plastics' (although they talk about and diss those who have done the plastic themselves, too, but would never dare admit theirs! In fact, they accuse Courtney of having some done, and she does not like that!)
She was instructed by her friend's lists starting with 'The L.A. Eco-Chain of Dating List of who to date and how. It is the 'who, money, pre-nup's, money (again), The Good, and The Bad'. There is another list of "How to Be an Imperialist Resident of the Westside of Los Angeles, C.A.", or better yet, it's the "How to Marry Up the L.A. Chain of Dating". LA also has a Celebrity Royalty list, too, the who, the how to or not to talk but knowing when to talk and what to talk about to whomever according to how the celebrity tiers list applies to! This list gets even more detailed from here. Lists, lists, lists to live by!
Another important list also includes who your parents are/were, the schools you attended (or were lucky enough to have your parents get you into or not), what your religion is/was, the college you went to, and how much further you went in education from there as well! Whoever would have thought dating and your social life in general revolved around all these lists!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Wonderful read!! September 22, 2014
Format:Kindle Edition
As I started reading the first chapter I was instantly hooked and couldn't wait to get further into the novel. The first thing I loved was the way there was a chart of who’s dateable and who isn't dateable which is called “Eco-Chain of Dating” in the book. Each chapter in the book had a subtitle included (i.e. 10—How I Can Be More Perfect Than You.) I noticed that the subtitle of the chapter was what the author was dealing with at that point and in an offhand sort of way it gives the reader a little piece of wisdom as well.
At first I thought it was a work of fiction and once I read the back of the book a second time I realized that it was a memoir of Ms. Hamilton’s life. I thought there were a few areas in the book that made me laugh, but there were other areas that I felt aggravation and frustration at other people in Ms. Hamilton’s life. I couldn't stand the author’s mom and I found most of her friends to be a tad on the “bitchy” and self-centered side of things. I thought Courtney Hamilton should have gotten some better friends.
I found the chapters to be a little long, but once I got halfway through the first chapter I didn't really notice how long they were anymore. Overall I found this book to be a wonderful read and I think it will give readers a glimpse into how women try to be “Hollywood Royalty” and what they are willing to do to get there. I give Ms. Hamilton and Almost Royalty an “A.”
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Quirky Chick Lit May 30, 2014
By lq
Format:Kindle Edition
Quirky and funny chick lit tale of a woman trying to find herself, and her perfect mate, in LA - the land of Almost Royalty, and "ruled" by a pseudo caste system among potential dating partners.

This book is told in a series of vignettes. Each chapter could be read independently, but together they tell a cohesive story. The writing style took a bit to draw me in, but once I understood what the author was doing, I thoroughly enjoyed the book and would recommend it to anyone seeking a non traditional chick lit read
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars well done May 30, 2014
Format:Kindle Edition
A very clever and funny read. Like an updated and Los Angelized Jilly Cooper's Class for the current decade.

It's a lengthy book, and at times a bit repetitive, but I think intended by the author to highlight Courtney's "doomed" life as a single mid-thirties woman.
It's definitely well written and very amusing to read. This satirical take is well done.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
Format:Kindle Edition
Almost Royalty.
A comedy of contemporary bad manners. chronicles the horrible social crimes the venal inhabitants of Brentwood commit looking for love and skirting sexual politics for sport.

But don't for a moment think that it’s is not an entertaining adventure that exposes social media of the person to person kind. I was gleefully appalled at the code of misbehavior revealed in the pages of this book. I could not put it down. (Attention Showtime: I want to see these sexy awful deeds serialized on screen.)

And just when I thought it was all surface sensation ensconced in awkward situations it submerged me into deeply personal revelations and laid bare the heart of Courtney Hamilton who is struggling to make sense of her life while swimming in the shallow end of the dating pool - with sharks.

One might ask if the thirty-something dating scene in Hollywood (geographic and metaphoric) is as bad as all that. According to her research - which must be her personal experience - she proves her point persuasively with skill and dark hilarity. Her truth telling is so impacted with lacerating wit and barbed comic commentary that she skewers the most deserving (men) with will and grace. She finds these creatures guilty of hypocrisy and narcissistic dysfunction too well. I am confident readers, single, divorced or on the cusp, gay or straight, will recognize the type and modus operandi she reports.

By the time she rests her case by the end of the book one can only judge that all of her targets (girlfriends, mothers, therapists,talent agents, realtors, gurus and rascals) should be banished to hell for their uncivil conduct. But alas some that she satirizes are rewarded with success and some degree of happily ever after instead.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Hilariously Witty!! so SoCal!
Not only could I not put it down because it was so well written and frankly hilarious, but It was actually much deeper. Read more
Published 1 day ago by Dana Folstrom
5.0 out of 5 stars A Satirical Look at Single Life in Los Angeles
I normally don't read much fiction, but this book was recommended to me and it proved to be a fun, light comedy. Read more
Published 11 days ago by SHooper
5.0 out of 5 stars It is a funny and poignant story of living and dating in LA
I am not a big reader but when I started this book, I could not put it down. It is a funny and poignant story of living and dating in LA. Laugh out loud funny! Read more
Published 11 days ago by RMorris
4.0 out of 5 stars ) I did enjoy this book
** spoiler alert ** I received a copy of Almost Royalty by the publisher. That was a kind gesture, and I really appreciate it! Read more
Published 1 month ago by Kelli Comer
1.0 out of 5 stars but I do when something is really great, or so bad that I feel the...
I rarely take the time to write reviews, but I do when something is really great, or so bad that I feel the need to warn people. Read more
Published 2 months ago by c-mac
5.0 out of 5 stars When I first started reading this book I was expecting to hate it. I...
I will be honest. When I first started reading this book I was expecting to hate it. I actually put it down after the first chapter to read another book. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Katie
5.0 out of 5 stars Sense and Satire
Hilarious. A savvy, sophisticated, spot-on satire of characters with upscale lifestyles who are intent on climbing, or scrambling, ever higher on the ladder of success and... Read more
Published 3 months ago by Jo
4.0 out of 5 stars I very much enjoyed this novel
I very much enjoyed this novel! Having grown up in the LA area I could relate to many aspects of the story, and there were moments in this novel that made me laugh out loud. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Alan Black
4.0 out of 5 stars I thoroughly enjoyed it. The writing is clever and smart and
It took me a bit to get into the groove of this novel, it's flow, it's style, but once I did, I thoroughly enjoyed it. Read more
Published 4 months ago by KD
4.0 out of 5 stars Living In L.A. Means You Are “Almost Royalty”
Almost Royalty reminded of all the things I loved in White Girl Problems. I smirked along with Courtney as she made fun of the culture in Los Angeles that made for an excellent... Read more
Published 5 months ago by Dana
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More About the Author

Courtney Hamilton has worked in Hollywood with writers, directors, executive producers, actresses and actors in the entertainment industry in L.A., Las Vegas and New York, including Golden Globe and Emmy winners in television and feature films (particularly in the humorous fiction, humor romance and women's fiction genres). Based in Los Angeles, California, Hamilton is a keen observer of L.A. Royalty and southern California society (which many consider a romantic fiction of its own). Almost Royalty is a fictionalized satire of Los Angeles social classes and especially those who aspire to be part of the city's A-Level Royalty.

Sit. Read. Have some Velveeta. Enjoy. Laugh.

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