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Alone in the Dark

2.1 out of 5 stars 191 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

Edward Carnby (Christian Slater) is a private investigator specializing in unexplainable supernatural pheonomena. His cases delve into the dark corners of the world, searching for truth in the occult remnants of ancient civilizations. Now the greatest m

Special Features

None.

Product Details

  • Actors: Christian Slater, Tara Reid, Stephen Dorff, Frank C. Turner, Matthew Walker
  • Directors: Uwe Boll
  • Writers: Elan Mastai, Michael Roesch, Peter Scheerer
  • Producers: Bruno Bonnell, Dan Clarke, Dan Sales, Frederic Demey
  • Format: Multiple Formats, Closed-captioned, Color, NTSC, Widescreen
  • Language: English
  • Region: Region 1 (U.S. and Canada only. Read more about DVD formats.)
  • Aspect Ratio: 1.85:1
  • Number of discs: 1
  • Rated: R (Restricted)
  • Studio: Lions Gate
  • DVD Release Date: May 10, 2005
  • Run Time: 96 minutes
  • Average Customer Review: 2.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (191 customer reviews)
  • ASIN: B0007XBM5W
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #64,593 in Movies & TV (See Top 100 in Movies & TV)
  • Learn more about "Alone in the Dark" on IMDb

Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

I laughed, I cried, it moved me... out of the theatre. Not fast enough, sadly, to escape the inept garbage bin that is "Alone in the Dark." It's the sort of movie that gets relegated to discount bins for four bucks, but isn't ever purchased -- poor direction, bad acting, and a script that pushes new boundaries of silliness.

It opens with an explanation about the Abskani, an ancient civilization who apparently worshiped demons -- and were somehow destroyed by them. Fast-forward to the twenty-first century, and you find that the adage about "those who don't learn from history) is true: Professor Hudgens (Mathew Walker) is obsessed with using Abskani artifacts, and only Edward Carnby (Christian Slater), a clone of Agent Mulder, can hope to stop him.

Carnby is haunted by nightmares that are somehow connected to those ancient demons, and by experiments that Hudgens performed years ago. He teams up with his museum-curator ex-girlfriend Aline (Tara Reid -- and no, I am not joking!) to stop Hudgens from using some ancient statue to release interdimensional aliens, who may destroy the entire human race.

It's an exhibition of wooden acting, an orgy of silly ideas, a giant steaming pile of celluloid that should have been relegated to late nights on the Sci Fi Channel. In fact, it's difficult to understand why this video game adaptation wasn't relegated to the "Direct to Video" bins, along with all the other bad horror flicks.

Where to begin? What bad thing about this is the worst? Let's start with Uwe Boll's direction -- it's leaden and uneven, full of slow-motion and quick cuts at all the wrong moments. Apparently nobody told Boll that alien beasties jumping out does NOT count as a shocking plot twist.
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1 Comment 128 of 136 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
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Format: DVD
We saw "House of the Dead" and blanched in sheer horror at the ineptness apparent in every scene. We gaped at the use of actual videogame footage spliced into the aforementioned movie. We shrieked in terror, not at the so-called horror elements of the film, but at the fact that Jurgen Prochnow deigned to appear in such trash. And we absolutely wept with soul shattering intensity to see the venerable character actor Clint Howard saddled with an annoying lisp while sporting a cheesy looking yellow rain slicker. As the credits rolled in "House of the Dead," we felt a moment of elation because we realized calling Jack Kevorkian was not necessary, that we would recover from the worst film experience many of us had witnessed in some time. Such was the experience of many viewers' regarding their first encounter with the indomitable Uwe Boll's freshman cinematic disaster. Then came "Alone in the Dark," and the nightmare continued. Who among us will have the bravery to climb to the peak of the highest mountain and shriek at the top of their lungs, "Get thee behind me, Uwe Boll?" From the looks of it, just about everyone who has seen this disaster. No one, thankfully, pulls any punches in describing this train wreck.

Christian Slater's character Edward Carnby has a serious problem. No, it's not appearing in Uwe Boll's film, although that would certainly classify as an insurmountable difficulty. Carnby's primary problem, first elaborated on in an introductory screen scrawl that roughly equals the length of the Oxford English Dictionary, involves an ancient race of technologically advanced people called the Abracadabras...er, I mean the Aldonovas...darn, the Abskani! Yeah, that's it, the Abskani. I think.
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Comment 61 of 67 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
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Ladies and gentlemen, may we bring the five star reviews present here to your attention, and may we point out the obvious facts:

1: They are all written in lowercase characters - and so are the account names of their posters.

2: They contain identical adjectives ("hot", "funny") and nouns ("action", "cast") as praises.

3: They share the same spelling mistakes (or are these inept attempts to impersonate an incompetent speller?)

4: They all consist of one sentence only.

5: They all come from freshly registered accounts with no reviews of any products other than UwEbola's film.

6: 90% of the account names of "these reviewers" contain references to an awkward musical genre which, if I recall correctly, is named "gangsta rap".

Ergo, only one question remains: was the person who registered all these accounts and posted all these reviews *ordered* to do so by, say, a Lion's Gate executive, or has s/he acted out of a foolish, misguided sense of loyalty to Uwebola?
2 Comments 39 of 47 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Yes No Sending feedback...
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Format: DVD
For the plot outline, here's what the back of the DVD box reads:
"Edward Carnby (Christian Slater) is a private investigator specializing in unexplainable supernatural phenomena. His cases delve into the dark corners of the world, searching for truth in the occult remnants of ancient civilizations. Now, the greatest mystery of his past is about to become the most dangerous case he has ever faced. With the help of his ex-girlfriend, archeologist Aline Cedrac (Tara Reid), and his bitter rival, government agent Richard Burke (Stephen Dorff), Edward is about to learn that just because you don't believe in something doesn't mean it cannot kill you!"

According to the character of Carnby, fear of the dark is what keeps us alive. Sadly, however, fear of crappy movies doesn't keep us from renting them. Despite the horrible reviews, I decided to give into the temptation of renting Alone In The Dark (I had a free rental, so I figured there couldn't be much of a loss). It was even worse than I'd expected...

For one, the creatures that are unleashed from the depths of darkness -- or whatever cliche horse feces is shoveled around in the story -- are pathetic CGI dino-beasts. Anything interesting, frightening, or even simply "cool" about them? Nope. Just pointless computer-generated monsters that fail at entertaining the audience in the slightest way. For two, the acting is horrendous. Seeing Tara Reid on the DVD's main credits made me roll my eyeballs, but seeing her attempt to act as an archeologist in a sci-fi action flick just made me laugh. The only half-way decent acting is given by Christian Slater, but it's still not enough to cover up for the rest. And for three, the movie is terribly boring, with few action scenes.
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