Customer Reviews

I Am My Lover: Women Pleasure Themselves

5 star:		(9)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

This book is NOT for you if you are going to be freaked out by explicit (beautiful, poetic, explicit) images, or by women of various ages and body types (as opposed to silicone-implanted Barbie dolls), or if you think that the tensions and grimaces (and radiant smiles) of orgasm are "un-lady-like".

It IS for you (whether you are female, male, straight, gay or bi) if you are interested in seeing real women gleefully demonstrating their favourite methods of masturbation in gorgeous black-and-white photographs by a selection of different photographers (some female, some male as well), accompanied by their own words and thoughts about solo sex.

"I Am My Lover" is joyous, liberatory, educational, and jaw-droppingly erotic. None of the photos are "staged" or designed to fit someone else's idea of what's sexy - the sexual energy is so real it seems to shine off the pages.

Joani documents masturbation for what it is. It is a very natural and pleasurable act. Every one of these women has a unique experience to share with the reader. Each woman responds differently to different types of sexual stimuli--dildos, vibrators, etc. Yeap, their appearances vary from one to the next, but hey! women aren't Barbie dolls. I admire and congratulate them for being courageous and pioneering. Yes! Women have a right to share about their experiences just as men do on their own ways. Masturbation is normal. It's our birthright!

Masturbation. It seems odd sometimes; the way things we all do are those we seek to avoid discussing or even thinking about. Everywhere we look we see people lauded and storied for conquering "fear," challenging "the unknown." Jumping off of this, leaping into that -- The fashionable heroism of artificial risk. All the while, away from the bright lights, cameras and water cooler cheers, a different courage is found. I Am My Lover: Women Pleasure Themselves is the sweet and nourishing fruit of people brave enough to journey into the known, to conquer the fear of oneself and one's desire, with we the viewer in tow. Conceived and edited in 1998 by Joani Blank, founder of San Francisco's famed Good Vibrations shop, the anthology presents twelve women and six photographers acting in concert to explore and reveal the lyric beauty, sensual drama and emotional energy that all who indulge in self-pleasuring (i.e.: everyone) know well but rarely speak of. The women captured in the images ranging from 19 to 40 years old, are nothing like the models so often found in even the best erotic art. They could be from anywhere; 12 women from 12 separate worlds, united into a single nationality of expressive intimacy; each a goddess of beautiful imperfection.

The photographers, obviously inspired by their subjects' willingness to share who and what they are, create images that stand with their own best works. Almost all elect to work in the most mundane surroundings - living room sofas and bedrooms are the most frequent - which gives an even more heightened sense of our having "walked in" on each scene we witness. The images are done so elegantly, in black and white or duo tones that dismissing them as "porn," "trash," or "ugly" requires a leap of puritanical proportion. All the photographers bring their own styles to their subjects, but are never heavy-handed or unnecessarily "artsy" in their approach, most electing to use simple daylight or only the most basic artificial lighting. Each portfolio gives rise to wonderful, sweet secrets seen through the eyes of the artists and the bodies of their subjects: a hand grasps into the fabric of a pillow case during an intense moment; a nipple pinched and pulled until it seems ready to burst in a spray of milk and honey; a housecat wanders into the scene to rest at a woman's feet, as if to share in the pleasure of the moment; a belly dips in the light, revealing a faint trail of hairs leading to hungry, desire-slicked lips. With each moment, each detail, we see each woman more clearly, and perhaps our own selves and desires as well.

The artists seem to return the inspiration as each woman contributes their own written introduction to their portfolios. Some write poetry that ripples with the scent and textures of their sex while some offer gentle prose of the feelings that swell in them as they touch themselves. Many offer their own sexual history, clear-eyed and unapologetic, a testimonial to the freedom of body and mind they've come to own and cherish. The more that we're shown; the more we wish to see, share and feel ourselves. In its way, I Am My Lover: Women Pleasure Themselves is like the very act that it reveals to us - a simple but magnificent reward to body, soul and mind, a book we can always open again and again.

NOTE: One of the saddest things I've noticed about the other reviews here is the number of WOMEN who have derided this book, especially the one who claimed to have "laughed with her friends at it" before returning it. I showed my copy to an erotic model that I have worked with and she howled in disgust at the age of some of the women in this book, her position being that anyone "old" shouldn't be sexual in front of her (I won't go into the things she thinks are okay here). I wonder if I'll ever understand the way women police and censure each other.

This is a beautiful, photographic book of twelve women masturbating, with short essays by most of them. The printing and presentation is of high quality. I appreciate the book for its beauty and because it is so rare to find a book that addresses female masturbation.

The women are ordinary women -- some older than others, some larger than others, with the occasional tattoo or piercing; often using just their hands, sometimes using a vibrator or dildo.

This is clearly not a book of erotica designed to arouse, but a book of beauty designed to inform. This book joins Joani Blank's "Femalia" on my book shelves as a book I'm proud to own and proud to show around to friends.

Joani Blank is among the true mothers of the movement to establish a more open sexuality in America and in the this beautiful volume she carries the standard forward again. Six photographers present here their images of 12 women, each masturbating alone, sometimes using sex toys, sometimes outdoors. Short commentary from each woman is included: beautiful, blunt, poetic, always characterized by the ring of honesty.

Honesty is a word that comes to mind again and again as this writer re-visits "I Am My Lover". Honesty and openness, warmth, symapathy, acceptance and appreciation, all wrapped in sexual passion, love, and respect for the variety in human sexuality are in these fine photographs.

This may be the sexiest, most erotic book in my library.

What moved me most about this fine title is the reletive homliness of the women pictured. After all, women need not be beautiful to enjoy themselves and their bodies. In fact, this book can provide for the overweight or "ugly-in-the-eye-of-men" women I know with the method, insight and inspiration to experience true sensual pleasure. It would make a fine gift for any wife, daughter or mother seeking to not only increase their own sexual fufillment, but also expand their knowledge of their own anatomy -- something suppressed by our phallus-dominated society. If only I had this book when I was an unsure, lonely teen, I would not have lost so many years before my own erotic awakening.I encourage this book to be shared between women and made available in school libraries and health offices.

We bought this as a (heterosexual) couple, and were fairly disappointed. From the title we were hoping for a first-person narative exploration of the subject of female masturbation, including physical techniques, fantasies, and some of the social prejudices surrounding this subject. However, the text is much more abstract than this. Some of the subjects have included brief commentaries on their pictures, some poetry, and some have provided no discussion at all. The photos themselves do not hold a great deal of artistic merit and would probably not even be considered particularly erotic by most people. The work is "groundbreaking" in that it shows real women engaged in an extremely intimate act, but does not have much to offer individuals of either sex interested in the subject of female masturbation.

This book helps every woman explore their own body. I am not very good with the men at my school and so this helps me pleasure myself in every way imagined since I don't have a man to do that for me. This book helps me explore my "G" Spot. They never taught me this in school, and believe me for certain people who look like me this book creates wonders!!! I have so much more self esteem now that I know that I can get pleasure from myself. Now I know that late at night I'm not alone...I'm free to explore myself without anyone. It has helped me a lot and I owe this book to bringing my sexuality back to me.

Six photographers and twelve female models present this most intimate kind of play, solo sex. The models cover a pleasing range of ages, from yong adults to others at least in their forties - a pleasant reminder that age doesn't end sexuality. The women in these photos also vary widely in build and appearance. Some are much curvier than the current fashion demands, proving that fashion doesn't always get it right. With the added alchemy of intense arousal, all of these models come across as deeply beautiful women.

Many photos attend to genital details, including the different kinds of caress that different women prefer. Breast stimulation matters to many of these models, so the photographers document that too. Vibrators and other toys appear as well, but the focus always returns to where it belongs: on the woman and on her happiness.

-- wiredweird

I Am My Lover is a picture book that features twelve women, each telling her own experinces with female masturbation. The photos in the book displays every woman's emotion as they take part in their self-loving. I Am My Lover also encourages everyone who reads this book that masturbation is a safe and healthy part of everyday life.