Customer Reviews

The Ambulance [VHS]

5 star:		(2)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

A wonderful, funny, and criminally overlooked thriller. Eric Roberts stars as a comic book writer (Stan Lee cameos as himself, Roberts' boss) who watches a girl on the street get taken away by an ambulance and then disappear. He starts to investigate with the help of a police detective (a hilarious James Earl Jones) but soon discovers he is in WAY over his head. The action scenes are alot of fun because Roberts doesn't turn into an action hero but stays consistent with his helpless everyman persona throughout (by the end, he is battered beyond all recognition and is only alive by pure luck). And Red Buttons steals all his scenes, as he should. Check this one out, you won't be disappointed.

Saw this movie about ten years ago and keep searching the web waiting for it to come out on DVD. It should! Eric Roberts was great right along with James Earl Jones and Red Buttons. Like they say in the biz, "A Must-see!!"

Eric Roberts is a comic book artist searching for a missing woman who he last saw placed in an ambulance. Intriguing premise from Larry Cohen is actually played for laughs more than anything else. Thankfully, once you get in the mood for it, it's pretty funny. The story slows down too often to create quirky characters, but when it moves, it's fitfully entertaining. Roberts is a lot of fun in the lead role.

Writer director Larry Cohen's 1977 God Told me To (Aka Demon) was a spectacular achievement yet Cohen has never managed to create anything that comes close since. This film is hampered by miscasting and a general lack of focus, so that the Michael Crichton-ish medical conspiracy is never made real. Cohen's mixes his chase thriller with a comic tone, and the scenes of explanation are less effective. Even the action scenes with the Duel-like threatening title vehicle are undermined by plain ridiculousness, and Cohen stoops to the man tied to an ambulance bed in traffic routine. The idea of humans being stolen to be used as guinea pigs in scientific research was also used in Michael Apted's 1996 Extreme Measures, and it worked there because Hugh Grant as the protagonist was believably curious. Cohen adds some more potential by only having diabetics being kidnapped, without any explanation given as to how they are identified as such. However playing the Hugh Grant part, Eric Roberts doesn't fair as well. Cohen indulges Roberts in his flaky mannerisms, and you can tell how off Cohen's judgment is when he removes James Earl Jones as a neurotic cop midway. As Jones' assistant, Megan Gallagher comes off best, able to handle the romantic/comic banter with Roberts and also presenting a believable policewoman presence. And as likeable as Red Buttons is, his contribution is unnecessary. TV's The Young and the Restless Eric Braeden appears as a doctor with an agenda but this is hardly the vehicle to re-launch his film career.

I Liked this movie ever since I watched it on TV way back in the early 90's and now that I have found it on here, it's a definite buy for me, but I just wish they had took the time to bring this movie up to speed with alot of the other movies of it's time e.g. DVD.

A Cartoonist (Eric Roberts) stumbles into a odd conspiracy, what may have been a weird abduction, when his dream girl (Janine Turner) has been taking away by Paramedics Drivers, who never show up to any local hostipals.

Written and Directed by Larry Cohen (Q:The Winged Serpent, It`s Alive Trilogy) has made a campy, strange film infused with black humor and several exciting chase scenes. This is an intriguing flick. James Earl Jones has a supporting role as a Cop on the Edge. Cartoonist:Stan Lee appears in a Cameo. Grade:B+.

There is no denying the fact that director Larry Cohen has made his mark in suspense/horror cinema for several decades, he most recently found a venue to air his work with the extremely witty psycho-killer short for the "Masters of Horror" series entitled "Pick Me Up". But like any "cult" director, he is bound to have his fantastical as well as his disappointed. It is like a wave, with every great curl there is a powerful downfall. For example, David Gordon Green is directing the next film from the "Superbad" creators, a man who prided himself on such instant classics like "George Washington" and "All the Real Girls" will stoop to a dumber, probably more lucrative level. Larry Cohen has found his pitfall with the bomb of a film entitled "The Ambulance". Ripping from the pages of what seems like a Crichton-esque medical drama, Cohen pulls the myths of diabetes into the world of comic book artists and paranoid cops. Confused? Not to worry, it doesn't get any better than this. Using Eric Roberts in a horrid accent, unknown decisions, and oversized 80s suits, Cohen attempts to create a fear for an inanimate object that is typically used to save lives - in this film it becomes the source for chaos and death. Couple with the fact that Red Buttons gives us jokes that were made during the early part of creation, James Earl Jones in an unfunny gum chewing scene, and Janine Turner proving there is something she cannot do (i.e. act), Cohen butchers a film that wasn't strong enough in the first place by placing Landis-like jokes in a hodgepodge film. It is disastrous, but if you have seen "The Ambulance", I shouldn't have to be the one to tell you.

To be honest, the premise isn't one that couldn't be worked, but in this film, due mainly to the painful acting and short-tempered script, the initial premise fails instantly. Roberts falls for a random girl, who has diabetes, and is never seen again. It becomes his mission to hunt her down and find her among the chaos of eccentric characters. To begin, Roberts is horrible. He reads his lines from the cards behind the camera, half the time doesn't remember what he is to say (winging it is not one of his stronger suits), and builds absolutely no chemistry with anyone else on set. His initial lust for a random woman is ... well ... random. There is no reason to his sanity and his motive for the remainder of the film is never quite established. Is he a hopeless romantic, or just trying for anything? The fact that he is a comic artist is thrown into the story haphazardly, especially in the beginning where he tries to give out pictures he has drawn of her, only to find her cardboard roommate, following the same steps with the style of acting, drinks a Pina Colata, while muttering "I don't know why I am drinking this, I am a diabetic as well". DUM DUH DAH. These poorly placed moments of either comedy or honest drama are miscalculated from the beginning, forcing us to question what Cohen wanted to do. No homework was finished, no statistics were organized, obviously no acting lessons were required, and yet Larry Cohen was able to make a direct-to-video film using Eric Roberts and James Earl Jones. Not too shabby for those eager to get into the business.

The words above don't even scratch the surface for what atrocities the acting was in this film. It was worse than a High School drama, nobody cared, and it was apparent from the first time that Roberts opened his mouth. There were no characters. Nobody in this film did something that one could consider saying, "that was fully in his characters realm". Vague was the underlining factor and acting style between these actors. I would have expected this from some, but not from James Earl Jones who proves that you don't have to pass acting 101 to get work in Hollywood. Perhaps I am confused, was Cohen trying to pay homage to another style of filmmaking or genre? It wasn't apparent in this film, as much as I would like to forget it, the story matched the characters. Diabetes was the joke of the film. While it should have been something that scared us, every time it was mentioned a laugh erupted. What made me happy was to see that at least Ecto-1 was getting work post "Ghostbusters", but even he fell into the Roberts trap. While I believe he was the only one to do his own stunts and physically remember his lines, by the end of the film the ambulance was never quite as frightening as one would hope. The doctor who was committing these crimes was never explained, never questioned, never judged, just evil without motive. Where was the motive in this film? As this review is typed, questions over-inflate my mind. These aren't intelligent questions, but instead, ones that need to be asked to get out of the sinking plot holes in the script. Why would any cop shoot a gun into the air in a dance club? What is the deal with the other death in Central Park? Why was Red Buttons given Bob Hope-styled jokes? Why did Stan Lee approve this film?

Questions.
Questions.
Questions.
I need answers, answers, answers.

"The Ambulance" was a pathetic excuse for a film. There is a reason why it hasn't made it to the honorable level of DVD, and hopefully it never will. Perhaps it has an underground cult following, or Ecto-1 has more fans that I knew, but this was painful to view. James Earl Jones, chewing gum, ranks among one of the worst jokes/images I have ever had to experience in my days of cinema watching. I kept waiting for something, anything to pull this film out of the gutter, but the level of disappointment continue to grew with each unbelievable scene. Nothing made me laugh, nothing frightened me, nothing upset me more than the complacent disrespect for a dangerous and serious disease. If Cohen had done some homework, pushed the level of insanity with the doctor, created a more menacing vehicle, I think we would have had a mediocre little thriller on our hands, but with the choices made, it just turned into depressing garbage. I think Cohen has made his mark, but "The Ambulance" probably set him back for years. From the beginning to the end, there was no potential. This film needed a reset button, from Roberts' amateur accent to the robotic characters that Jones and Gallagher (the tough-as-nails femme cop with a heart of gold), and the jokes of Red Buttons which would make your ears bleed. "The Ambulance" is a hidden film, and with what I just witnessed hopefully will never make it to the surface again.

Grade: ½ out of ***** (only due to my respect for Ecto-1)