The Amityville House Of Pancakes Omnibus, Volume 1 [Paperback]

Pete S. Allen (Editor)

Book Description

Publication Date: April 1, 2004

Like a phoenix, gasping and wheezing from the smoke of its fiery death and rebirth, AHOP lives on, if somewhat haphazardly. Creative Guy Publishing announces the first annual Amityville House of Pancakes Omnibus, frightening small children and offending old people as it blazes through a small town near you. Like a cavalcade of Herb Tarlecks on Viagra, AHOP intends to offend, amuse and get some all at the same time. AHOP features the works of four deranged, but really very nice, authors blazing trails into the somewhat suspect genre of humorous speculative fiction. This volume includes novellas from each author, so you do the math. Oh all right, four novellas, for one generous helping of 80,000 action-packed, hilarious words. Well, not all of the words are hilarious in and of themselves. But when you put them all together, oh boy! Also worthy of note is that this book will be CGP's first foray into print, and the print trade paperback version, with swell cover art from New York artist Kris Dikemann, is available through mail order from lulu.com. Novellas included: The Girl in B33, by J.D. Welles, Dirk Moonfire & the Nefarious Space Women, by Jack Mangan, Cultural Clashes in Cádiz, by Jetse de Vries, and Gypsies Stole My Tequila, by Adrienne Jones. All introduced by Sally, your zombie hostess.

Editorial Reviews

Review

It's like the ghost of Bill Gaines created a Mad Magazine with an EC horror/post-underground comix sensibility... -- Ernest Hogan, author of Smoking Mirror Blues

From the Publisher

AHOP features the works of four deranged, but really very nice, authors blazing trails into the somewhat suspect genre of humorous speculative fiction. This volume includes novellas from each author, so you do the math. Oh all right, four novellas, for one generous helping of 80,000 action-packed, hilarious words. Well, not all of the words are hilarious in and of themselves. But when you put them all together, oh boy!

Product Details

• Paperback: 212 pages
• Publisher: Creative Guy Publishing (April 1, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1894953266
• ISBN-13: 978-1894953269
• Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #4,618,661 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Gypsies Stole my Tequilla is my favorite story!, October 20, 2004

By 

Ann Cory "http://www.anncory.com" (Aphrodisiacs for the Mind) - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Amityville House Of Pancakes Omnibus, Volume 1 (Paperback)

Gypsies Stole my Tequila
Written by Adrienne Jones
Creative Guy Publishing
$12.95

Gypsies Stole my Tequila is an addictive novella in The Amityville House of Pancakes Omnibus Volume One. While I have yet to read the other three novellas within this distinctive collection, I must say if they're anything like this one, I can't wait! Adrienne Jones has penned a colorful plot thick with suspense, setting, imagery, humor, and a musical tribute to the good old days of punk rock.

The title alone made me want to check out this story, one where Joe Blood, former punk rock musician, has only until his fortieth birthday to live. As his birthday nears, he lives in constant fear. When he was a teenager, his close friends and band mates made a pact, set in blood, they would all die together as they all turned forty. It is that very pact that haunts Joe in the form of a beast, growing stronger and more life like as the days pass. The creature waits for the day, marked clearly on the calendar, the day of his birth and death, all in one.

For twenty years, Joe's life hasn't been as exciting as his punk rock days; instead he meanders through sessions with a counselor and a measly job as a butcher, where he's forced to dress in a degrading cow costume. While outside of the job he still dresses in extravagant attire, reminiscent of his youth, he is reminded everyday that it will all come to a fateful end at the edge of a cliff. The memory of the night of the pact still haunts him; along with the shadow they want to ignore they saw. He grows desperate to find his old friends Vincent and Deke, to tell them about the beast and how they must follow through with the promise.

Interwoven in this engaging and fun story is Vincent's son Max who wants to be a rock star. With the help of Joe, he is able to turn his lazy band into something worthy enough to open up for their favorite rock group. The only catch is, Joe is running out of time. As Joe relives the dream he gave up, the beast grows antsy and fierce. It's only a matter of time before everything comes to a head, and his dreaded birthday arrives.

Adrienne Jones is an exciting and creative author. I loved her imagery, characters, dialogue, and style of writing. Each sentence had a smooth flow from one to the next, and I grew to care a lot about everyone. This is by far a shining piece that should garner a lot of attention. Not only is it unique, but also the whole tie in with the title and other elements of the story make for superb storytelling that seems almost extinct in novellas today.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Really weird stories, July 3, 2005

By 

David A. Olson "davidolson22" (WI, USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Amityville House Of Pancakes Omnibus, Volume 1 (Paperback)

This collection of four stories goes from weird to really weird.

It starts off with a tale about a ghost living in a theater who kills anyone who takes her seat. (It sounds scary when described this way, but it's actually pretty funny in the book.) Most of the jokes in this story are in the strange situation, but there are plenty in the dialog and narrative too.

The second tale is in the spirit of all those old pulp science fiction movies like Flash Gordon. Not as funny as the first, but the plot was far better.

In the third story, two character go back in time to when Spain was partially controlled by both Muslims and Christians. This story covers such weird ground as where the word "Ole'" came from in Spanish. The situation in this story is the most complicated in the anthology, and has a lot of resonance with recent events.

The fourth and final story is about an aging punk rocker whose calender is out to get him. A lot of goofiness here, but this story kept irritating me because of certain pet peeves that I have. I couldn't find myself caring for a hero who was a punk rocker that insulted music I liked, and I didn't like the implication that the fantasy elements were all in his mind.

1 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars ADRIENNE JONES- BEST new author to find!, December 27, 2005

By 

Jennifer Richards (Tyngsboro, MA United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Amityville House Of Pancakes Omnibus, Volume 1 (Paperback)

Gypsies Stole my Tequila
Written by Adrienne Jones

This book of short stories was ok.... but this particular story found deep inside was absolutely fantastic... an entertaining and mind bending read. I highly recommend getting this book if only to read this one story!
She has got to be one of the best new up and comming authors out there today!
Go for it.. you know you wanna read this one....