Customer Reviews

Appearance Obsession: Learning to Love the Way You Look

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For over 35 years, I have hated the way I look. When I was younger and thinner, I didn't think I was pretty or thin enough. As I matured, and gained some weight and facial lines, I despaired. I have spent more time and energy thinking about, despairing, berating myself, and trying to figure out my next move (to make myself prettier, thinner) than I have spent on any other aspect of my life.

This book really woke me up and made me realize how my obsession with my appearance has been controlling my life. I saw myself in all the examples - and finally started laughing! For the first time in my life, I am laughing at this ridiculous obsession, recognizing it as a horrible waste of my time, and moving on with my life.

My aim now is to be healthy and strong, to live to a nice old age, and enjoy my family and friends.

As a therapist, I have used this book in running workshops with college aged women. There is much information available in Johnston's book which is very readable, educational and comforting. She offers her own perspective as a woman living in a society in which "every day is a walking Miss America contest". Helpful checklists encourage readers to get in touch with their own level of discomfort with body image issues. Best of all, Johnston gives some practical advice for minimizing the impact that the media and other sources of appearance obsession has on us. By the way, I have used parts of her book in workshops for college men who also deal (albeit quietly) with similar issues.

I'm afraid that I couldn't get past the first 3 chapters. This is not a book for women who are truly overweight. This is more of a book for those women who really do look good but just can't see it.

I am overweight, and people who say you need to learn to love the way you look no matter what you look like, have never had a significant weight problem.

This book aims to help people who are so obsesseed about their appearance that they allow this to dominate their lives, and their perceptions of themselves. The recommedation is for greater realism and greater moderation. There is much here which tells the way the Media and Culture lead people into this 'appearance- obsession'. There is also the point that those seeking to be perfect in looks torment themselves into despair, often by dieting to do this. This appearance -obsession is also shown to have its source in family relations. The book does not try to sell the idea that looks are not important but rather to have people put their sense of their own looks in proportion. It enjoins women especially to be realistic about their looks.
While the book is tremendously repetitive it is also interesting at spots. I am not exactly a looks- maven or one who has cared overmuch about this in my life, though we all care when we are told that we do not look alright. But I do believe this book very soberly makes the case for having a realistic view of one's own looks and in so doing improve one's own sense of self- esteem.
I wish however the book had had one more chapter indicating that there might possibly be other sources of self- esteem which are extremely important to most people.