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Are Men Necessary?: When Sexes Collide [Hardcover]

Maureen Dowd
2.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (144 customer reviews)


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Book Description

November 8, 2005
Fresh from her success with the best-selling Bushworld, Maureen Dowd turns her sparkling prose and wise wit to a topic even more incendiary than presidential politics: sexual politics.

Four decades after the sexual revolution, nothing has worked out the way it was supposed to. The sexes are circling each other as uneasily and comically as ever, from the bedroom to the boardroom to the Situation Room, and now the New York Times columnist who won a Pulitzer Prize in 1999 for saucy and incisive commentary about the dangerous liaisons of Bill, Monica, Hillary and Ken Starr digs into the Y and X files, exploring the mysteries and muddles of sexual combat in America.

In a new book filled with chapters that surprise and amuse, Dowd explains why getting ready for a date went from glossing and gargling to Paxiling and Googling; why men are in an evolutionary and romantic shame spiral; why women have reeled backward in many ways; why men may be biologically unsuited to hold higher office, given their diva fits and catfights, teary confessions and fashion obsessions; why women are fixated on their looks more than ever, freezing their faces and emotions in an orgy of plasticity that makes the Stepford Wives look authentic; why male politicians and male institutions get tripped up in so much monkey business; why many alpha women, from Martha to Hillary, can have a successful second act only after becoming humiliated victims; and why the new definition of Having It All is less about empowerment and equality than about flirting and getting rescued, downshifting from "You go, girl!" to "You go lie down, girl."

In addition, Dowd, who has reported on historic moments on the sexual battlefield, from Geraldine Ferraro's vice-presidential run to the Anita Hill-Clarence Thomas hearings to Hillary Rodham Clinton's reign as copresident, explores not only how many of these shining feminist triumphs backfired on women but also how Hillary, a feminist icon busy plotting her campaign to be the first woman president, delivered the final blow to female solidarity herself.

Women's liberation has been less a steady trajectory than a confusing zigzag. Feminism lasted for a nanosecond and generated a gender tangle that has bewitched, bothered and bewildered men and women for forty years. Now comes a woman to cut through the tangle and tickle Adam's rib. The battle of the sexes will never be the same.


Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

She may be smart, incisive, witty, and keenly observant but with the release of Are Men Necessary?--a series of pithy (some might say piqued) ruminations on the sexes--Maureen Dowd will never, ever be championed by guys. Not that she cares. Even those who seek to avoid her columns in the august pages of The New York Times are certain to stumble over her invective in syndication. Dowd, it often seems, is everywhere. So those seeking even more via this book should be warned: Are Men Necessary? not only asks the eponymous question; it seeks to answer it with myriad examples (some convincing, some not) drawn from the Toronto Star to Kenneth Starr, from Cosmopolitan to Condoleezza Rice. You can bet a lot of folks aren't going to relish the answer.

With hands on hips and eyes wide open, Dowd surveys gender relations in contemporary settings such as the workplace, the White House, the mall, and the media, comparing and contrasting as she goes. And while her secondary sources are endless--and, let's face it, the subject of gender inequality is not exactly new--Dowd manages to produce a fair share of bons mots. To wit, this pearl on the subject of plastic surgery and men: "I have yet to see a man come out of cosmetic surgery without looking transformed into some permanently astonished lesbian version of himself," Dowd quotes a source as saying. "It's terrifying. My friend's father had just his eyes done by the best, most highly sought-after cosmetic surgeon in New York City. And he doesn't look refreshed or well rested. He looks like he's being stabbed to death by invisible people." Dowd's generously dispersed anecdotes, though seldom as funny, are equally readable. In the end, though, one wishes Are Men Necessary? went beyond simply grocery listing examples of sexual disparity to offer concrete suggestions for change. Then again, maybe that's too great a task even for a woman like Dowd. --Kim Hughes

From Publishers Weekly

Dowd's Bushworld, collecting her amped New York Times op-eds, hit big during the 2004 presidential campaign. This follow-up is as slapdash as the earlier book was slash-and-burn. What Dowd seems really to want to do is dish up anecdotes of gender bias in the media, which she does with her usual aplomb—everything from how Elizabeth Vargas was booted out of Peter Jennings's vacant chair at ABC during his illness ("I'm not sure if she has the gravitas," opines an exec) to the guys who won't date Dowd because she's got more Beltway juice (and money) than they. The rest is padding: endless secondary source and pundit quotes ("In Time, Andrew Sullivan wondered: 'So a woman is less a woman if she is a scientist or journalist or Prime Minister?' "); examples of gender relations gone wrong in books, film and TV; random interview blips ("Carrie, a publicist in her late twenties from Long Island, told me...."); little musings from girlhood that are rarely revealing enough; endless career rehashes of everyone from Anita Hill to Helen Gurley Brown. A chapter on dating is a mishmash of everything from The Rules to He's Just Not That into You; one on reproductive science (that asks the title question for real) ends up referring a lot to orgasm. It's intermittently entertaining, but neither sharp enough nor sustained enough to work as a book.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 352 pages
  • Publisher: Putnam Adult; First Edition edition (November 8, 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0399153322
  • ISBN-13: 978-0399153327
  • Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6.7 x 1.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 2.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (144 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,014,242 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
394 of 477 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars lacks introspection, but Dowd is a genius at flippancy November 14, 2005
Format:Hardcover
Dowd is a fabulously sarcastic writer. When my opinion synches with hers, I revel in the deliciously wicked way that she expresses herself. It is a good laugh and the writing is truly unique. But when I don't agree, I find her style and opinions irritating and superficial, that is, unwilling to look beneath the surface in either a constructive or a genuinely insightful way. I suppose that is why she is a great columnist - you never have to get beyond about 800 words and you can forget her opinions as you step off the subway.

Well, this book in my opinion brings out the worst in her. She masses statistics about why so many talented women remain unattached, and makes an argument that it proves feminism has failed: because men basically want bimbos and women want to "trade up", the most interesting women (like, uh, her) get left without enduring relationships. Behind this funny and elegantly written argument, Dowd utterly fails to ask herself any of the harder questions that require introspection. Why can't she find a good relationship? Why do certain types of men approach her? Etc. It is not she who is deficient or somehow repellant to those who might love her, but men as a category and even society as a whole that come up short. This is OK for a pithy column, but in a book it wears awfully thin after the first chapter. Her lack of introspection is, well, depressingly relentless on such a personal subject. This is singularly unimpressive.

Moreover, what about all the talented women who DO find relationships that work? I am married to one of great talent and intelligence, who challenges me constantly and does not allow the marriage to stand still, even when it hurts. To have it any other way would be boring.
... Read more ›
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63 of 73 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Bunch of Baloney December 18, 2005
Format:Hardcover
I'm a married professional woman and and consider myself a feminist, but I probably disliked this book as much as the angry males on here.

The book primarily a collection of stereotypes. There is an element of truth in some of these, but some of it is just wrong.

For example, Dowd states she would have had a better chance at being married if she had chosen a career as a maid. That's possible, but most likely in that case she'd probably be married to a janitor, not one of the high status males she seems to feel she deserves.

Maureen Dowd is the female equivalent of all those angry men who complain they aren't getting any because women are too focused on men with money...It's always easier to blame the outside world for your failures then look in the mirror.

She does have a point that "society" still values women primarily as sex objects, but men are not the only ones to blame for this either. A much, much better book on that subject is "Female Chauvanist Pigs".

I admit this book is entertaining, but don't give Ms. Dowd your money - buy it used.
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88 of 105 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Why young women are turned off by old feminists. April 3, 2006
Format:Hardcover
Dowd has absolutely nothing useful or interesting to say. I think her book is summed up by the 'pink change purse' that she gave to a young friend that says 'BOYS ARE STUPID, THROW ROCKS AT THEM.' Leaving aside the utter obnoxiousness of this (think of an item of clothing that read 'Blacks are stupid, throw rocks at them', "Jews are stupid, etc.') the sentiment truly explains her problem. She wants to throw rocks at a certain group of people and thinks that in spite of this, they should be interested in or attracted to her (or women of her sort). Wake up and smell the coffee, Maureen! You don't need evolution to explain why you haven't been able to get married. Maybe men are dumb, as you endlessly say in this book, but they are sure smart enough to stay away from rock-throwing women. Ooof!

P.S. I am a female Yale graduate. I've been happily married for 23 years, so its not being smart that is the problem. I have three sons who I am raising to stay away from women like Maureen!
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14 of 15 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
This book was selected because the title was provocative and I was interested to find out how the author was going to attempt to address this question: are men necessary? Admittedly, I have a jaundiced view of books of this ilk, they fall into the same category as 'Men are From Mars and Women are From Venus' - trite and clichéd. But I figured that this woman has journalistic standing and may offer some interesting insights or arguments. What seemed to be a collation of facts and observations brought together to address ideas of sexism and male/female power relationships became a mishmash of the author's personal experiences with anecdotes inserted in-between in an almighty journalistic mess. This book is for those with a taste for opinion pieces that don't really address issues with much depth. It was reminiscent of Christopher Hitchen's latest effort on the religion/science debate but gladly didn't descend into rant and derision. That is not to say this books wasn't an occupying read; the style is clear and readable. Merit that can be derived is an insider's view and some interesting facts about American politics. The author's insistence though on referring to her own life somewhat intruded into the piece and detracted from the work. Reading this book was like reading pseudo-intellectual newspaper or magazine editorials from end to end. So, the question in the title isn't deconstructed, it is prodded at, and then left unanswered. A light read, but not much light shed in the end.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars A voice for all women who have been made to feel guilty for their...
Maureen Dowd's voice speaks to me in the darkness of a lonely place, one where men are terrified of women who are successful on their own terms. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Anne Babson
5.0 out of 5 stars She Brings Out Some Good Points
This is a very simple book and a very quick read, which is always pleasant. Maureen Dowd's adeptness at pointing out the fallacies of Presidential Politics is turned more towards... Read more
Published 9 months ago by CelticWomanFanPiano
1.0 out of 5 stars Nobody Cares
Maureen Dowd was never that attractive and, if you want to date men, don't be a jerk. She's an angry jerk. Read more
Published 9 months ago by M. Jackson
4.0 out of 5 stars Who's Afraid of Maureen Dowd?
This is faux literary art, as the overwhelming writing talent of Maureen Dowd (acting as a provocateur in a pulp fiction salon of gender bending collisions), discusses DNA... Read more
Published on January 18, 2011 by R. A. Shaw
4.0 out of 5 stars Nobody in the WORLD is going to like this review
I understand that there has been a lot of bad feeling over this book because... well the title is provocative. Read more
Published on April 29, 2010 by Cory Williams
5.0 out of 5 stars brilliant ideas and writing
Maureen Dowd captures, with great wit, humor and some sadness, the complexities of life in the "new" milennium. Read more
Published on September 17, 2009 by Pagefree
1.0 out of 5 stars Her ugliness shines through
Mnay women, though not particularlly attractive are nonetheless beautiful people. They glow with an inner beauty that cannot be hidden. Read more
Published on May 9, 2009 by Billiam
3.0 out of 5 stars For New York Singles only
So Are they? Maureen Down promises to answer this question or at least ask it in her book but falls a little short. Read more
Published on May 3, 2009 by Roland G. Martinez
5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant Sleeper
Ms. Dowd shares some very thought provoking insights with just enough humor to make them more palatable. Read more
Published on April 29, 2009 by A. L. Moore
4.0 out of 5 stars Good Female Snark
I found this book to be disjointed, all over the map: science, opinion, some whining and complaining, Bush bashing, Hillary bashing. Read more
Published on January 24, 2009 by mark jabbour
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Dowdy Dowd
Maureen Dowd has plenty of defects, but being "dowdy" is not one of them. Do you even know what the word means? Please get a dictionary - and some grammar lessons.
Nov 4, 2007 by A. You |  See all 3 posts
Are men necessary?
its been a while michele but i just read and came across your question.yea men are necessary but only when women need them or need something done
Apr 5, 2009 by h crowther |  See all 2 posts
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