Customer Reviews

Are You in Love With a Vampire?: Healing the Relationship Drain Game

5 star:		(3)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(3)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

This rather chilling title gives a pretty good clue to what you're in for. Harris takes readers on a journey of exploration into one of the most frightening aspects of the unconscious dynamics of close relationships-the potential for draining another's life energy. It's uncanny how close to literal truth the fantastic vampire stories we like to "entertain" ourselves with may be. The author's couragous accounts of some of her own experiences suggest that she really know whereof she speaks. The book not only helps to identify the vampiring phenomenon in relationships-and to distinguish it from codependency-but is a virtual workbook of practical techniques and exercises to deal with the probelm. The book makes a valuable contribution-perhaps on the order of "lifesaving" as was the case with Robin Norwood's Women Who Love Too Much-to the literature of empowerment and personal healing.

"This is a book of wisdom about matters that speak directly to our Souls! A 'must read' for this crucial time of rapid transformation"

"Helaine's courageous and insightful perspective sheds light on this 'shadow' part of us, her compassion and understanding help heal it. I encourage everyone who has experienced pain in relationship to read this book."

Not recommended for people wanting serious information on emotional abuse. The author spends too much time talking about her life and not enough time spent on imparting information or assistance. Her lifestyle is very New Age and many may be turned off by her descriptions of pulsating energy fields... I'd recommend instead Verbal Abuse and Verbal Abuse Survivors Speak Out.

This book helped me recognize and understand how I allow myself and my energy to be drained or pulled by other people; and in what circumstances I may be doing the same thing. The book also lays out a premise for how this condition is created, focusing on being in relationships with parents and authority figures who are mentally, physically, emotionally or spiritually abusive. The communication styles of the abusers and victims are explained. Victims grow up to repeat the same type of relationships as they are unable to recognize the abuse, and the victims themselves become abusers. Hence, the premise: once bitten by an (energy) vampire, you become an (energy) vampire. For me, understanding the issues lead me to recognize and accept them in myself and the vampires whom I love. Helaine admits to having loved vampires herself, and admits to some of the vampiring communication styles. In reading the book, I was not totally convinced that she had licked the problem for herself. And while her program for overcoming the issues are useful, I believe they only scratch the surface of what is needed. Nonetheless, the book sent me in the right direction and I have done much more studying on the concept of our energy and our energy bodies. Using "The Guide to the I Ching" by Carol K. Anthony has provided me the greatest guidance in balancing, maintaining, and protecting my energy. Caroline Myss' books are another excellent source of understanding energy, as well as Ani Lea's "Soul Fusion."

Among the New Age mumbo jumbo and talk of angeles, meditation and shamanism, Harris gives some practical advice about how to spot someone who will drain the life out of you, rather than participate in a healthy give-and-take relationship. The book also includes a vampire checklist with which you can find out if you or your partner is an energy/relationship vampire.

Helaine shares her own personal journey with her readers, weaving theory, practicality and hope throughout.

From learning about personal energy to recognizing energy vampires, this book has reinterpreted an age-old problem into contemporary language. The book is easy to read and understand so that anyone can benefit from its information.

The author describes the various types of "Vampire Relationships" and why they flourish. She gives hope and help to those in these types of relarionships, so that victims may not only recognize, but also escape from them.

The book is both provocative and practical. Thereis an especially interesting easy-to-use chart in which Harris compares the Vampire Relationship with co-dependent and healthy relationships. Some readers may be surprized by her conclusions.

Along with its cautions and hopes, the author's own journey motivates readers to look within to find answers. Whether or not your in love with a vampire, you will find Harrs' investigation both fascinating and enjoyable.

The idea that people "suck us [emotionaly] dry" is not particularly surprising. However, "PsychoShamanist" Harris takes this somewhat pedestrian anaolgy even further, differentiating various levels of Vampires who feed on other people's energy: Level One ("Devouring Mothers"), Level Two ("Insestuous Father"), and Level Three, or full-out psychic-attack level. Harris details her own life and dealings with "vampires" of three types. She talks a lot about energy flow between people-defining vampires as net energy takes-and the need for us to connect with the "Universal Energy Flow." She also includes some case studies of her clients that are oddly out of context. Because of its unorthodox ideology, this book is not recommended for a basic self-help section but for libraries with a strong patron interest in New Age materials; this may be just what the PsychoShamanist ordered.