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Are You Somebody?: The Accidental Memoir of a Dublin Woman
 
 
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Are You Somebody?: The Accidental Memoir of a Dublin Woman [Paperback]

Nuala O'Faolain (Author)
3.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (93 customer reviews)

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Book Description

February 17, 2009

"You don’t want the book to end; it glows with compassion and you want more, more because you know this is a fine wine of a life, richer as it ages."—Frank McCourt, author of Angela’s Ashes

One of nine children born into a penniless North Dublin family, Nuala O’Faolain was saved from a harrowing childhood by her love of books and reading. Though she ultimately became one of Ireland’s best-known columnists, her professional success did little to ease her loneliness and longing for a deep connection to the world. Are You Somebody? distills her experiences into a wisdom that can only come from an obstinate refusal to shrink from life.

This commemorative edition of her landmark memoir celebrates O’Faolain’s remarkable life and work with a new foreword from Frank McCourt as well as additional archival materials. Strikingly vivid and starkly emotional, Are You Somebody? is, like O’Faolain herself, a singular example of courage, honesty, and bold living.


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Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Self-preservation did not come instinctually to Irish journalist Nuala O'Faolain. One of 9 children--her mother had 13 pregnancies in all--she grew up in the 1940s and '50s in a defeated Dublin household. Her reporter father seems to have spent his time and money, and even love, elsewhere--and as the family grew more isolated and unable to cope, alcohol became her mother's only way out. "One of the stories of my life has been the working out in it of her powerful and damaging example in everything," the author admits, "Nothing mattered to her except passion." Some of O'Faolain's siblings emphatically didn't make it, but she was lucky to find refuge in books. They have been a defense, a comfort, and a delight.

Does her memoir then follow the standard rags-to-self-acceptance trajectory? Are you wondering if perhaps you can give it a miss, and in fact send the entire genre on a well-deserved vacation? Don't. Are You Somebody (the title unaccountably lost a question mark somewhere between the Irish and American editions) offers a wrenching account of childhood and a highly provocative take on the sexual and professional situation of Irish women. Though literature made O'Faolain, the male-dominated literary life and industry certainly didn't, and she now gives it more than a few body blows. It was a world in which writing and drink mattered far more than women: "The 'literary Dublin' I saw lied to women as a matter of course and conspired against the demands of wives and mistresses.... Women either had to make no demands, and be liked, or be much larger than life, and feared."

Irish women didn't seem to know to look for, let alone demand, equality. O'Faolain miraculously avoided pregnancy; but others were not so blessed. "Lives were ruined at that time, thousands and thousands of them, quite casually.... They were hotly pursued, and half longed to yield, but they were not able to defend themselves against pregnancy, and they were destroyed if they got pregnant." For all her energy and ambition and good fortune (and she needed this trio to jump her family's "sinking ship" and avoid getting pregnant), O'Faolain fell for the cant that she must marry, have children, and serve. Some will be initially shocked by her assertion that she was lucky never to have had a child. "Childbearing, along with bad education, relationships that managed to be simultaneously all-absorbing and rewarding, and financial dependence--these were the enemies of promise. But that's not why I'm glad; I didn't think of myself as having promise. I'm glad because under the old system it was so easy to rear children badly. The child wouldn't have properly survived." Yet the '70s enabled her to break out of the assumptions and realities of Irish women's lives, not to mention her yearning to be like "the troubled, rich, English upper-class people in books."

At the end of her memoir, O'Faolain knows she finally is, in fact, somebody. Still, those who don't recognize her see her only as a single, middle-aged woman. Like children, such individuals "aren't supposed to kick up." Thanks to this bracing book, the author gets to permanently do so. The writing exercise has answered some of her questions and some of her fears, but O'Faolain is too honest not to admit that for others there is no response or cure. She leaves us wanting to know more about her life but grateful that she has allowed us in. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Library Journal

"I'm not anybody in terms of the world, but then, who decides what a somebody is? How is a somebody made?" asks Irish Times columnist O'Faolain. The answer can be found in her moving and painfully honest memoir, a best seller in her native Ireland that deserves as much attention here.
Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 240 pages
  • Publisher: Holt Paperbacks; Second Edition edition (February 17, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 080508987X
  • ISBN-13: 978-0805089875
  • Product Dimensions: 7.8 x 5.2 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (93 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #284,959 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
47 of 48 people found the following review helpful
Excellent read November 16, 2000
By kbwong
Format:Paperback
If you like your tales to have an ending, a point, and a moral-of-the-story all nicely and neatly printed out, avoid this book. If you are intelligent enough to draw your own conclusions and examine both your own and other people's lives in the clear light of day, you will be delighted and mesmerized by this book.

Nuala O'Faolain is a work in progress, and she knows it. She's a product of her generation who has spent her life trying to become something other than what she was raised to be. She shares what her life has been with clarity and humor; she whines and then prods at herself for whining; she presents her own confusion and negatives in a stark and uncompromising manner. She is fully human right out in front of God and everybody, and I can only admire her bravery and hope that someday I'll grow up to be of her character.

The women who were born the two generations before mine (I was born in 1960) are the ones who were the advance soldiers in the dirty, muddy war of women's rise to full citizenship of humanity. I admire them, I thank them for their sacrifices, I hope that their struggles were not in vain. O'Faolain's book gives a human dimension to what will someday be three or four lines in a history book. I gulped it down in two sittings, finishing up at 2 am.

It's not a book for everyone (and thus only four stars). Wait until you're mature enough to really understand that no one is really as mature as you thought you were when you were 21. Wait 'til you're old enough to have compassion for the humanity in yourself and others. And then you'll be able to "get" this book.

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43 of 46 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
You either love this book or find it a tedious whine. Why would a conventional, middle-aged English teacher like myself find it worthwhile, even riveting? It helps that I have visited Ireland several times in recent years, and have gradually seen beyond the Irish Tourist Board conception of the emerald isle. And I have enjoyed Dublin, despite its scruffy character. I also have spent most of my professional life working with single women, and though none of them have faced life situations as tough as Nuala's, I still found connections with her life and their's. I also teach English, and I love her affection for poetry and books. But most of all, I love her truth-seeking, and despite some of the personal complaints on this list of reviews, this is a crafted book that never left me confused. We all have parents, and conflict between us seems to be just a part of living we can't altogether avoid. I thank Nuala for bravely writing her memoir. I read it straight through in two chunks of time over two days.
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24 of 24 people found the following review helpful
By A Customer
Format:Hardcover
I found this book intensely moving -- but not for the reasons I thought I would. It's everything the reviews say: a brutally honest picture of the author's chaotic and emotionally starved childhood, a memoir of literary Dublin in the 60's, a melancholy tale of her search for a lasting love, and a chronicle of her journalism career, and on that level it's a fascinating (and beautifully written) story for anyone.
But I'm only about 5 years younger than Ms. O'Faolain. I was raised in a (partly Irish) Catholic family, went to Catholic schools all the way from kindergarten through college, then went to graduate school at Berkeley in the late '60's. Time after time, her observations chimed with my own: the cruelty masquerading as love (or maybe it's the other way round) in Catholic schools; how living in an intensely Catholic environment blinds you to any other viewpoint; how matter-of-factly women were consigned to invisibility in our era, even (and especially) the well-educated; and how the assumption of male superiority lingered on throughout the supposedly "liberal" sixties and seventies.
As the author points out in "Afterwords," her book became a best-seller in Ireland because she articulated what many of her fellow-countrymen felt but couldn't say about their lives. But I think her experiences have a far wider relevance for any woman who grew up in the same time period -- and who's now struggling to make sense of her life.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
I read this because it was a memoir
Am in the midst of writing my own memoir so read this one because I was intrigued by Frank McCourt's Forward. Read more
Published 4 months ago by SeattleGal
Thoughtful and moving
Ireland has changed beyond recognition since Nuala's time, however the vestiges of the debilitating post Independence Catholic culture are still to be seen. Read more
Published 4 months ago by D. Kerr
Not anybody I want to know about.
If Ms. O'Faolain would stop name-dropping for a minute and talk about her actual life, I have no doubt this could be a readable tale. Read more
Published 14 months ago by E. S. Charpentier
Breathtakingly Honest
I was interested to see the range of reaction this book has gotten from readers. Although I did not find it consistently gripping (the parts in the middle that are long lists of... Read more
Published 18 months ago by Kathleen A. Flynn
To the heart
Many of her observations are painfully accurate. Our mothers did endure what Nuola describes.They witnessed battles against all the odds for even a token gesture of recognition. Read more
Published 21 months ago by Bernadette
No self-pity here...
What I loved about this book, despite it's ongoing fairly grim story, was that O'Faolain never descends into self-pity. Read more
Published 23 months ago by Dorothyanne Brown
Boring Memoir
I found this book to be really boring. I initially really enjoyed the first few pages, but the author jumped around so much, I found the book confusing. Read more
Published on April 28, 2010 by Kerry Dashnaw
a never-ending train wreck
Nuala O'Faolain's book is elegantly written, but sometimes it got so depressing that I wondered if I wanted to keep reading. Read more
Published on June 22, 2009 by Lance Eccles
Very disappointing
After being completely charmed by 'Are you Somebody?" I was expecting at least a well-written decent read. Read more
Published on June 2, 2009 by C. Powell
The New Irishwoman
Nuala O'Faulain writes of her life in an uncompromising, hard look at a time spent very differently from many of her countrywomen, and gives vast amounts of insight into the roles... Read more
Published on May 14, 2009 by M. Juziuk
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Inside This Book (learn more)
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Are You Somebody, Nuala O'Faolain, Sean Mac Réamoinn, Northern Ireland, Open Door, Good Friday, New York, Merrion Square, Mary Lavin, Open University, Christmas Day, Patricia Avis, University College Dublin, Clonliffe Road, Earlsfort Terrace, Dubliner's Diary, Terry O'Sullivan, Frank Finn, Radio Eireann, James Joyce, O'Connell Street, Nuala U'Faolain, Seamus Heaney, The Irish Times, Noel Browne
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