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Army Wives: The Unwritten Code of Military Marriage
 
 
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Army Wives: The Unwritten Code of Military Marriage [Paperback]

Tanya Biank (Author)
4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (72 customer reviews)

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Book Description

May 29, 2007
Army Wives goes beyond the sound bites and photo ops of military life to bring readers into the hearts and homes of today's military wives.
 
Biank tells the story of four typical Army wives who, in a flash, find themselves in extraordinary circumstances that ultimately force them to redefine who they are as women and wives. This is a true story about what happened when real life collided with army convention.
 
Army Wives is a groundbreaking narrative that takes the reader beyond the Army's gates, taking a close look at the other woman--the Army itself--and how its traditions, rules and war-time realities deeply impact marriage and home life.

Frequently Bought Together

Customers buy this book with Chicken Soup for the Military Wife's Soul: Stories to Touch the Heart and Rekindle the Spirit (Chicken Soup for the Soul) $10.17

Army Wives: The Unwritten Code of Military Marriage + Chicken Soup for the Military Wife's Soul: Stories to Touch the Heart and Rekindle the Spirit (Chicken Soup for the Soul)


Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

In this insider's account of the sometimes-lethal strains that military life puts on families, Biank, an award-winning journalist and the daughter of a career army officer, finds much to admire in military spouses. She follows the lives of four women at Fort Bragg, N.C., home of the 82nd Airborne Division: the wife of a high-ranking officer who adds luster to her husband's career with her own polish; a senior noncommissioned officer's wife who ambivalently watches her son follow in his father's footsteps; a woman who falls in love with an enlisted man early in his career and struggles with balancing army demands with her own needs; and a former soldier who finds that the counterterrorist operative she married may be just as dangerous to her as he is to terrorists. Though her prose is sometimes clunky and some of the history feels a bit dated, Biank's novelistic sense of detail and suspense vividly demonstrates how "the Army... could bring couples closer together... or it could rip relationships apart." Army wives cope with unpredictable deployments and struggle to raise children alone, often on small paychecks, in a community both tightknit and sharply judgmental. "Army wives serve, too," says Biank—in an institution ambivalent about families. She makes sympathetic both their pride and their tragedies. (Feb.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Booklist

The author of this provocative portrait of modern army wives is herself an army wife and comes from an army family. That combination of experience and insight enhances the value of the book's depiction of the army-family community. Basically, army wives these days are more often than not educated professionals but are expected to function enmeshed in a unique hierarchy very different from anything in civilian life. Moreover, they are far more frequently required to move house and home than civilian wives, and their risk of suddenly becoming widows is constant. For this the army has established support networks, but again, those are sui generis. Overall, Biank furnishes a detailed reminder, if any is needed, that the military is still a hierarchical subculture dominated by male values that imposes a considerable burden on those semi-innocent quasi bystanders, army wives. A good choice for military collections of any size. Frieda Murray
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 288 pages
  • Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin (May 29, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 031233351X
  • ISBN-13: 978-0312333515
  • Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.5 x 1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (72 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #304,029 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

72 Reviews
5 star:
 (38)
4 star:
 (18)
3 star:
 (6)
2 star:
 (3)
1 star:
 (7)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.1 out of 5 stars (72 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

34 of 36 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Heavy Reading, February 11, 2006
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I am an Army wife and was thrilled to see a modern look at the military wife. The book is extremely well written. The characters were brought out in a manner that humanized them rather than stereotyped. The book is about Army wives at Ft. Bragg during a short time period and does not truly show how happy a lot of us really are. I finished the book and felt really depressed about the deaths and suicides on Ft. Bragg. The 82nd is unique and many Army wives never set foot there. I am a former soldier as well as the spouse of an Army man with 24 years in and we still love it. We do not just help out during funerals. The fun is missing in this book. It is fun to be part of it all-- we are not duty bound to help each other. We do it because we want to do it. The book also keeps bringing up "clean houses" as if that were the most important thing we care about. She mentions funerals and what woman would want a crowd coming through her house without the chance to straighten up. One of the best Army wife moments I ever had was at West Point when another Army family stopped by at 11am on a Sunday morning and seeing the chaos that my house was in just after church she quickly smiled and said, "I live in my house too." That is what Army wives are really like. There are truly many awesome wives out there and more great marriages than bad. The book focuses on mostly bad marriages and tragedy. In this operational environment I was hoping for an inspirational book about Army wives. This book is a page-turner and I could not put it down. After re-reading the jacket I can say the book does advertise itself as being just what it is, but the publicity around the book suggests it gives insight into the world of all Army wives.
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19 of 20 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars A remarkable book, July 5, 2007
I nearly read this book in one sitting--it was that mesmerizing. As an Army wife for 18 years, I can tell you that Tanya Biank has accomplished what I've never seen: a book about Army life written with a journalist's eye for detail and the understanding, compassionate tone of someone who's been an Army brat and became an Army wife herself. Her research, candor, and writing talents are first-rate as she offers us a window into the lives, personalities, and backgrounds of 4 very different Army wives.

This isn't the definitive book on Army wives--no one can write that because it's a deeply personal and complex subject that defies description. I think the subtitle is unfortunate, "The Unwritten Code of Army Wives," as if it were a tell-all, but don't be put off.

UNDER THE SABERS is part slice-of-life, part cultural commentary, and part news reporting as Biank's portraits of these Army wives intersect with the sensational national headlines of the murders at Fort Bragg. In the process, she articulates the daily challenges we can all relate to, such as frequent moves, solo parenting, social pressures, and anxiety about our husband's safety. UNDER THE SABERS documents an important and unrecognized social history. It will always have a prominent place on my bookshelf, no matter where we live.

Marna Krajeski, author of HOUSEHOLD BAGGAGE: THE MOVING LIFE OF A SOLDIER'S WIFE.
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30 of 34 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars Narrow focus, truly depressing, misleading, March 13, 2009
This book was nothing more than a dreadful look into the lives of a small handful of women who had horrible experiences. Do not judge this book by its cover. Mine displayed a happy couple kissing as they walk out of the church after their wedding under an arch of sabers. What a happy picture. Enjoy it because it's the last happy thing you'll see in this book. The grand title creates the illusion that you will be getting an general, but inside, look at the lives of military wives. A true look at what Army wives face and how they cope.

What it provides is the utterly depressing story of a few women who faced murder, family deaths, illness, abuse, cheating, struggles, and unhappiness. It's not inspiring, and it will certainly not act as any sort of reference for what a new wife might face. As a matter of fact, if I had read this before I married my husband (enlisted infantryman on a career track in the Amry) I would have been terrified about the life ahead.

This title is so misleading that it's almost insulting to military wives who are happy. There are so many women who happily and joyfully approach their military marriages, myself included. We face deployments, moves, seperation, uncertainty, and hard times with faith in our marriages and a true love of our husbands and the Army. We are happy to do whatever necessary to support our husbands, but we also receive love and support in return. We have careers that do not make our husbands jealous, and some of us are even the primary bread winner. We would never think of cheating, and we faithfully provide unwaivering support during deployments. We are happy! And yes, there are families who face struggles, but the community really does come together to help out.

Please do not think that I take the stories in this book lightly. They represent a serious problem, and the women who made it out the other side have true strength that I can only imagine. Not one of thesen women "got what was coming to them", as some people indicated in the book. These stories are horrible and things like this do happen. My point is this: This is not a picture of "The Army". It is not the whole story and it is not the norm in military life. This is the story of a small group from a brief period of time in one town. To imply that the story of such a microscopic minority of Army wives is indicative of what all Army wives face is unfair, misleading, and small-minded. Not one happy person was interviewed, not one happy story was told. Call me and I will tell you how happy I have been with the military life, struggles and complaints included. I will tell you about the military couples that I know who love and support each other, no matter what. They face trials and struggles, but they are in it for the long haul. The one positive thing I can say about this story is that it has made me so aware of how good I have it and so thankful to my husband for being awesome. Other than that, it made me feel sick.
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Inside This Book (learn more)
First Sentence:
Christmas 2000 had been a slower news cycle-but not so slow that I didn't have to cover the cop beat well after eleven on a Sunday evening the week before the holiday. Read the first page
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Andrea Lynne, Gary Shane, Fort Bragg, Airborne Division, Special Forces, Green Beret, North Carolina, Rennie Cory, Andrea Floyd, Delta Force, New York, Fort Benning, Fort Campbell, Parachute Infantry Regiment, Basic Training, Colonel Hood, United States, Bragg Boulevard, Christmas Eve, Fort Drum, Mardi Gras, Pope Air Force Base, Special Agent Ryan, World War, Alex City
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