The Art of Conversation: A Guided Tour of a Neglected Pleasure [Hardcover]

Catherine Blyth (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: December 26, 2008

Read Catherine Blyth's posts on the Penguin Blog.

A wide-ranging, exhortatory look at the pleasures of great conversation, including strategies for how to bring it about, from the witty pen of an Englishwoman wise in its ways

In The Art of Conversation, Catherine Blyth eloquently points out the sorry state of disrepair that conversation has fallen into—and then, taking examples from history, literature, philosophy, anthropology, and popular culture, she gives us the tools to rebuild. Her prose embodies the conversational values she promotes: It’s smart, succinct, self-deprecating, and light on its feet.

The Art of Conversation isn’t about etiquette, elocution, or knowing how to hold your teacup with your little finger crooked just so. It’s about something simple and profound: connecting. In our distracted days, it’s easy to forget that each of us possesses a communication technology that has been in research and development for thousands of years. Conversation costs nothing, but can bring you the world.

Blyth offers us a chance to revel in the possibilities of conversation. As Alexander Pope nearly wrote, “True ease in talking comes from art, not chance, as those move easiest who have learned to dance.” Okay, Pope was actually talking about writing, but Catherine Blyth has that skill as well. When you have read The Art of Conversation, you’ll not only know the steps, but hear the music like never before.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Starred Review. British journalist Blyth was once described as the person you hope you'll find at the next cocktail party—or the person you'd like to be. The next best thing is a close encounter with Blyth on the printed page. Adopting a chatty, conversational manner to write about conversation, Blyth mixes personal anecdotes into a salmagundi of selected quotes from anthropology, history, literature, philosophy and pop culture to analyze and give advice on the dynamics of good conversation, not to mention the perfect riposte for every situation. She examines everything from small talk to pillow talk, from riotous raconteurs to crashing bores, from flattery to false smiles. The key is listening: Good conversation is a team sport; pace and energy keep it alive. Blyth probes layers of language, humor as social engineering, baiting, lies, flirting, evasions and failed shoptalk, such as how miscommunication lost Xerox the PC. Witty, eloquent and insightful, Blyth's book is a delightful encouragement to rediscover conversation as the best communication technology. (Jan.)
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Review

British journalist Blyth was once described as "the person you hope you'll find at the next cocktail party--or the person you'd like to be." The next best thing is a close encounter with Blyth on the printed page. Adopting a chatty, conversational manner to write about conversation, Blyth mixes personal anecdotes into a salmagundi of selected quotes from anthropology, history, literature, philosophy and pop culture to analyze and give advice on the dynamics of good conversation, not to mention the perfect riposte for every situation. She examines everything from small talk to pillow talk, from riotous raconteurs to crashing bores, from flattery to false smiles. The key is listening: "Good conversation is a team sport; pace and energy keep it alive." Blyth probes layers of language, humor as social engineering, baiting, lies, flirting, evasions and failed shoptalk, such as how "miscommunication lost Xerox the PC." Witty, eloquent and insightful, Blyth's book is a delightful encouragement to rediscover conversation as the best communication technology. --Publishers Weekly, Starred Review

'British journalist Blyth was once described as "the person you hope you'll find at the next cocktail party--or the person you'd like to be." The next best thing is a close encounter with Blyth on the printed page. Adopting a chatty, conversational manner to write about conversation, Blyth mixes personal anecdotes into a salmagundi of selected quotes from anthropology, history, literature, philosophy and pop culture to analyze and give advice on the dynamics of good conversation, not to mention the perfect riposte for every situation. She examines everything from small talk to pillow talk, from riotous raconteurs to crashing bores, from flattery to false smiles. The key is listening: "Good conversation is a team sport; pace and energy keep it alive." Blyth probes layers of language, humor as social engineering, baiting, lies, flirting, evasions and failed shoptalk, such as how "miscommunication lost Xerox the PC." Witty, eloquent and insightful, Blyth's book is a delightful encouragement to rediscover conversation as the best communication technology.' --Publishers Weekly, Starred Review --Publishers Weekly, Starred Review

"A wealth of rules, tips and strategies... Blyth proves her point in the 15 jam-packed chapters of "The Art of Conversation", which deconstruct its elements from small talk and pillow talk (Hint: It's not texting "ILY") to traversing the conversational terrain of the workplace or what best to say if you're caught in a verbal war (my favorite response to the arrogant, "Do you know who I am?" "I'd rather not").

Each chapter contains helpful rules -- the ones on using silence or navigating difficult conversations are particular revelations -- as well as anecdotes and quotes ranging from the orator who defended Helen of Troy to President George W. Bush speaking to freshman Sen. Barack Obama on the latter's first visit to the White House. There's also a clever compendium of 15 "bores, chores, and other conversational beasts" that will make your next foray into a bar or business reception much more entertaining." -- LA Times --LA Times, 11 January 2009

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Product Details

• Reading level: Ages 18 and up
  
• Hardcover: 304 pages
• Publisher: Gotham; First Edition edition (December 26, 2008)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1592404197
• ISBN-13: 978-1592404193
• Product Dimensions: 7.3 x 5.5 x 1.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (20 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #275,882 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #83 in Books > Education & Reference > Etiquette > Conversation

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

14 of 14 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Alas, a Disappointment, May 2, 2010

By 

Palmer W. Pinney - See all my reviews
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This review is from: The Art of Conversation: A Guided Tour of a Neglected Pleasure (Hardcover)

This work is a brilliant magazine article inflated into a mediocre book. The brilliant part ends with page 26. That page, titled "The Concise Manifesto," is a summary of what conversation ought to be, and it may be worth the price of the entire book. From there on, "The Art of Conversation" uses too many devices familiar to writers with deadlines to meet and spaces to fill: short paragraphs, abundant quotations from others, recurring categories and subcategories with slangy names, lists where ordinary paragraphs would do, and subheadings every few paragraphs. In other words, typography and repetition in place of thought.

Two other observations: The author, Catherine Blyth, is as beautiful as a fashion model, judging by the photograph on the dust jacket, and perhaps for her the art of conversation is not as fraught as it is for the rest of us. Also, she is English and occasionally uses phrases that must be clear on her side of the Atlantic but that puzzle me.

21 of 25 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Unimpressed and hard to read, May 26, 2009

By 

H.S. - See all my reviews

This review is from: The Art of Conversation: A Guided Tour of a Neglected Pleasure (Hardcover)

I was unimpressed with this book. Part of the book was common sense. Other parts of the book seemed to me like outdated British manners, and supplication in order to get other people to like you.

I found the book difficult to read. The author rarely stayed focused or on topic, as she went off on many tangents. Some of the examples given seemed to contradict the point she was trying to make instead of supporting it.

17 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Shallow conversation, March 2, 2009

By 

Jay C. Smith (Portland, OR USA) - See all my reviews
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This review is from: The Art of Conversation: A Guided Tour of a Neglected Pleasure (Hardcover)

The Art of Conversation: A Guided Tour of a Neglected Pleasure
This is an advice book. Do not expect any in-depth reflections on the philosophy, psychology, anthropology, or sociology of conversation. The best that can be said of it is that there is a lot crammed into its 288 sparse pages and many readers may find some small part helpful. We have all fumbled conversations, and as I read Blyth's book I had some shocks of recognition of mistakes I have made far too often.

Her attempt to fit in so much is also the book's chief weakness. I counted 95 "rules" strewn throughout, and that only scratches the surface of her advice precepts. There are also "principles," "maxims," "guidelines," "commandments," and other kinds of lists, adding dozens (if not hundreds) of further directives. Little space is left for meaningful discussion of any of these (although illustrative anecdotes and quotations appear with many of her rules). The Art of Conversation is broad and shallow.

There is no way that I, for one, could possibly remember more than a few of Blyth's guidelines when I am caught in, say, a tedious cocktail party conversation. It might be best just to focus on some common sense, such as "don't embarrass anyone" or "listen more than you talk." The author does not overlook such fundamentals as these, but they are buried into all of her other material. After reading the book I was unsure of what she might consider to be the three or four most helpful things she had to say.