Customer Reviews

The Art of Manliness: Classic Skills and Manners for the Modern Man

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Men don't have many places to turn for solid lifestyle advice. Most men's periodicals and websites offer trendy fitness fads, designer suits or softcore bikini photos with all the lifestyle help of a beer commercial.

And then there's The Art of Manliness. As time goes by I've gained great respect for Brett and Kate McKay and the classic-yet-fresh take on masculinity on their Art of Manliness website. True to form, their first book isn't an e-book sold on Clickbank, it's a paper-and-ink tome fittingly titled The Art of Manliness: Classic Skills and Manners for the Modern Man.

This book delivers on its promise in spades. If you get past the swaggering Victorian dandy on the cover you'll find practical advice that applies here and now, for almost every aspect of a man's life.

Its eight chapters reflect all sides of the total man. "The Gentleman," for example, includes tips and advice on becoming well-groomed and well-mannered, from how to fold a pocket square and iron pants to the "lost art" of wet shaving with a safety razor. If you want to know the difference between the American Man Hug and the International Man Hug, how to land a plane in an emergency or how to braid your daughter's hair, it's in there.

As a bonus, I found Art of Manliness to be a quick, engaging read. Where the AoM site frequently discusses its topics at length, the book is concise and well-structured, quickly laying out the steps to a tip or the case for a concept and then moving on.

Tying these tips and trivia together is the notion that what makes a man a man has never changed -- it just gets lost in the noise. A well-put-together guy still has a better shot at the women, fathering is still a manly art, and a man who practices common courtesy as well as his fighting skills still has a leg up on both the meathead and the mouse. Many of the references here are from a "golden age" of manliness that may or may not be a tad idealized, but the information is solid.

Most of this book is just plain common sense, and you'll find yourself nodding in agreement with advice like "Stop Hanging Around with Women and Start Dating Them" and "Give and Accept Criticism Without Coming Off as a Cad." That's not to say there aren't some concepts that might make you think twice: reading the McKays' advice on "Modern Technology and the New Rules of Etiquette," you might realize you've been using your cell and e-mail less like a man and more like a cross between a 14-year-old girl and Unfrozen Caveman Computer Nerd. (Yes, it IS possible to use actual grammar in an e-mail message!)

Reading deeper, another key concept surfaces: one change we suffer in the modern world is that the brotherhood of men has become less of a brotherhood and more like a loose circle of disposable acquaintances. And that, son, makes you disposable too. How many of us under the age of 50 (hell, 65) have thought of joining a fraternal organization? And how often have you planned a vacation with your buddies that involved gathering firewood or catching your own dinner? I think the McKays nailed it on the head: there's an underlying homophobia that keeps us leery of true male friendships, and a modern detachment that keeps us closed off from (or worse, antagonistic toward) our communities.

Rant over. The point is, you WILL learn something from The Art of Manliness, and you WILL come away a better man no matter where you come from. The first print run completely sold out before Christmas, but the second printing is finally available, so make haste before it's gone too.

Simply put, The Art of Manliness is a must read.

Finally, a men's book that isn't focused on "12 easy steps to getting ripped," or "10 secrets to hooking up with your coworker." If that is what you are looking for then The Art of Manliness is not for you. (Actually, it is probably more of a must read for you than you realize, but I digress).

The Art of Manliness is a witty, well-written collection of topics that are pertinent to true men. Topics your grandfather and father should have taught you. With today's limited quality of options related to men's literature, The Art of Manliness is a welcome change.

Go ahead - make the purchase. You'll be glad you did.

I love the concept behind this book and ordered a copy hoping I could share it with my son. Sadly after reading it cover to cover, I'll be sending my copy to the resale shop.

The authors spent a significant amount of time examining some of the great men in history (a good place to start) but couldn't seem to apply what they learned to the modern male. For example, they correctly identified the art of self defense as an area worthy of study but then chose "Bartitsu", a style of self defense that died out almost 100 years ago, as what a modern man should become proficient in. A quick Google search shows there isn't a "Bartitsu" school within 200 miles of me and I'm pretty sure the 10 pages devoted to "Bartitsu" moves won't be enough to teach you anything useful.

There is some useful discussion on respect, honesty, integrity, reliability mixed in with some everyday skills everyone should know, like how to change a tire and jump start a car. Then they teach you how to find North/South/East/West with a stick and your analog watch but not how to read a map to figure out where you are and how to get where you're going. It's not like they ran out of room, because there's sections in the book on how to land an airplane and treat a snake bite.

Bottom line, there seems to be a lot of random "skills" like the fireman's carry and making fire without matches mixed with advice on how to be a man of character that never really gel. It was a good idea, just poorly executed.

This book separates the men from the boys, then it spurs the boys on to BECOME men. Brett and Kate McKay have certainly developed a firm grasp for all things related to the art of being a gentleman (not an easy task for an attorney, I'm sure).

I've been following the McKay's work for awhile now on their blog site [...], and I'm constantly struck by how deeply they care about the men of our age. They've described their approach by means of the old analogy: "Throwing the baby out with the bathwater." The feminist movement did many great things for both women AND men in our culture, having removed many bad assumptions and inequalities. However, if those bad things were "the bathwater," genuine manliness was "the baby;" Brett and Kate are in the business of saving that baby.

Men today are looking for a good role model. We want to know what a REAL man looks like, because we're pretty sure that it's not the 30-something perpetual teenager, slumped down on a couch in his parents' basement, playing his XBOX. "The Art of Manliness" is a how-to book for that guy, a resource to help him become a creature of dignity, someone he can, himself, admire.

At its core, I believe this book is an attempt to call every man to a life of dignity, honor, and respect for his fellow man; in short, manliness.

And it does a great job, at that.

For a long time, I've been looking for a good book for my teenage son that can teach him some of the things he should know about being a man. I'm a single mom and I worry that my son hasn't learned some of the important skills that men need to know. But I just wasn't happy with what was out there. I looked at "The Modern Gentleman," but found the writing very pretentious and it wasn't really about being a good man. I also looked at the "Compleat Gentleman," which had some interesting historical information but it was really dry in some places and didn't have any practical advice for how to live a good life. I've been following the Art of Manliness website for a long time now and I love it, so I had high hopes for this book. But it definitely met those hopes! I got the book this week and gave it to my son and he's been reading it every night and says he really likes it. It's a wonderful book with such good advice, and it's interesting enough to keep a young man interested. I would recommend that all the moms out there get this for their sons!

Mr. Ben Geets' review include excellent background on the author husband & wife team, so I will keep this review strictly to the contents of the book. I received this book earlier than I expected and finished it in just about a day and a half.

I ordered this book as soon a I heard about it for 2 reasons. First, I am an avid reader of the Art of Manliness (AOM)Blog, and I thought it would be a great way to support the site. The other reason is because I thoroughly enjoy the McKay's writing style in their blog posts, I knew the book would echo similarly.

I cannot recommend this book enough. There are plenty of books out there that try to be a guide to all things men should know. They all fall into one of two categories. They are either specific to one topic like[...] or they cover TOO MANY areas without really going into depth on particular one. That is, until The Art of Manliness came along and found that sweet spot right in the middle.

The Art of Manliness (book and blog) provide just enough detail to leave the reader in the know on any particular topic, without trying to make them a pretentious snob about it. The writing is funny, but this is by no means a book with humor as its main goal. The information is solid, and the McKays have presented it in such a way to be enjoyable and keep your attention. For example, in the same chapter you may find insights by "manly" men in history like Winston Churchill or Teddy Roosevelt as well as references to Facebook. I appreciate the mixture of modern and historical perspectives.

You can skim or skip over certain parts completely that you wouldn't necessarily find relevant, as I did when I skimmed over the parenting chapter (being a 26yr old single future CPA at the moment). The chapters do fall into a kind of natural order though and you could read it straight through as you would a novel. It's a fun read and I enjoy the use of older "slang" that is no longer part of the modern man's vernacular (a glossary of these terms is included.

The Art of Manliness is more than just another book for the shelf of coffee table. It's got the right amount of the right information and is presented in an attention-keeping way. The Guide is interactive and thoughtfully crafted to provide a modern man with what he needs. It does all this without sexist, homophobic, or other negative yet still commonly considered "manly" sentiments.

Pick up the book, you will enjoy it and you will be supporting an excellent blogger and "Manly" Man and his wife.

I love the Art of Manliness website. I get the newletters everyday and love searching the website. Naturally, I wanted to get the book.

Pros:
Lot of info (much of it useful)
Good Artwork
Nice layout
I like the historical info

Cons:
Too much parent information (I am not a parent so maybe I do not appreciate it, but it did have too much info IMHO)
Should of had more info about men's clothing style and how to wear clothes from casual to dress effectively
I would of liked something more about careers, social ladders, etiquette, etc

Overall a good book, but lacking in some of the stuff I thought would be in there. While I can appreciate the 10,000 things you need to know about camping with your son and how to survive in the woods, I don't need to know EVERYTHING about that subject.

I expected more about character building, and this book lacked that.

I grew up in a household where etiquette was highly valued. I wish this book had been around when I was younger. The McKays do a great job in bringing back this lost art. It has inspired me in different ways to become more of a gentleman. I intend to buy this book for all the high school seniors in my church youth group as a graduation present. The skills they will learn can make real difference in their future at home, at work, and at play. Be sure to go to their website at [...] as well as listen to their podcasts on iTunes.

Brett McKay is a Tulsa, Oklahoma blogger, who, along with his wife Kate, has penned some of the most articulate and thoughtful sentiments on the dwindling state of manliness today.

This book should be a reference for any modern man who is living in today's gender-neutralized society where it is hip to poke fun at men, and the term "manliness" never shows up in the media unless it is connected with a crime or applied to a woman.

Mr. McKay is a bookworm; he has read all the great classics and studied the lives of great men from Theodore Roosevelt to Winston Churchill, from Martin Luther King, Jr. to George Washington. He uses his extensive knowledge and acute observational skills to draw up witty, detailed, and sincere advice on every area of being a man, from heroism to cleanliness, chivalry to friendship, fatherhood to virtues. This book is indispensable. Men all over America and the world are benefiting from the Art of Manliness, be it in book form, or on the blog.

He writes with the sympathetic but direct prose of a good father or male role model. The Art of Manliness does not make you feel bad if you are lacking in some areas of manliness; it just gives you direct, clear advice on how to improve. It is not written from a conservative or a liberal slant, a religious or an anti-religious slant; it reaches out to ALL men who are willing to improve. While other man-books out there turn manliness into a big joke, and others bog you down in deep philosophical ponderings, The Art of Manliness takes its subject seriously, but presents itself in a witty, easy-to-understand manner.

Also, be sure to check out my personal favorite blog post that was composed after Mr. McKay had already set the table of contents for the book in place: The Art of Letter Writing. Mr. McKay's thoughts on the dying art of hand-written, mailed sentiment and how to construct a proper letter have turned me into a passionate letter writer. Just one of the countless examples of how The Art of Manliness has influenced men everywhere. This book and its accompanying blog is a true one-of-a-kind.

Finally, something for men.

So far my favourite chapters have been, Chapter One: The Gentleman, which is chock full of the basic stuff that your father should've taught you but serves as a good refresher course, or a solid foundation to build on. Chapter Four: The Lover, I am pretty tight with the chivalry stuff but it was a cool read especially the segments pertaining to marriage, I was hoping this chapter was Kate approved to help me get inside of the female mind and not let anything unimportant slip through. By far my favourite chapter was, Chapter Five: The Father, of course because I am a father and I especially appreciated the segment "Raise Resilient Kids, it reaffirmed many things I already practice in raising my daughter which is good because some of those things can be scary such as "2. Let Them Do Unsafe Things". Plus I was amused at the "Teach Your Kid To Ride A Bike" segment in particularly the old dirty trick of "..let go of the bike's seat. To avoid a possible freak-out and ensuing spill, don't tell him you're letting go." The last two chapters "The Leader" and "The Virtuous Man" could be combined with chapter one as required reading for every young man. The humor peppered into the segments is a nice touch and keeps the writing down to earth and kept the pages turning. The glossary in the back is a nice "The Clockwork Orange" touch, and I know if I adopt too much of it I will sound like I stepped out of a movie (although I do naturally use a few of those). I now count "square-rigged" the newest edition to my vocabulary.

It definately sets itself apart from any self-help, lifestyle, fashion, philosophy type of books by means of the honesty of its we-give-a-damn tone that it strikes. A great book for perpetuating the endangered art of manliness.