Customer Reviews

The Art of Talking to Anyone: Essential People Skills for Success in Any Situation

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4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Much of life starts with conversation. To some of us it comes easy, to some of us it is very difficult. Perhaps the hardest is the conversation at a job interview, or that first conversation with someone to whom you are attracted.

In the job interview, the interviewer will usually be asking questions. Your job is to provide the answers he wants to hear. Even if you decide you don't want the job, if you don't get an offer you don't get to decide.

In the romantic area it's really much easier. If both of you are interested, the conversation will flow - once you get it started. If the other person isn't interested, there isn't anything you can do to change it, move on to the next person. Getting it started is your job, and as with the other situations where you need help, this book will give you some good ideas. Good ideas of both things to say, and things not to say.

This book has eight chapters on the basics of being a good conversationalist. Then there are nine chapters on talking in various situations from the workplace to social events to talking with romance in mind. She knows what she is talking about.

I enjoyed reading this book because of the actual examples it gives that you may adjust as you need to. Most other conversation books don't give you that, and to that effect, don't really help people that are trying to figure exactly what to say rather than just underlying concepts. Though much of the book may seem bland for those who don't like to take manners into account, it is written properly as it is. I highly recommend this book for novice/intermediate individuals who want to improve their conversation skills!

I have recently been into social dynamics and thought a book about the fine points of conversation would be helpful. Unfortunately, the book seems to be written by a prude who makes every effort to make your conversations as dull and boring as the book itself is.
Some major issues with the book.
a) Although "art" is the word chosen, most of the advice consists of things to avoid and in very specific detail (for example she says NEVER to say "to make a long story short")
b)More than half of the book text consists of assanine quotes from others that hardly relate to the subject as well as NUMEROUS and seemingly endless lists of statement examples (ie. "How nice of you" etc.) The author fails to realize that reading these are incredibly uninteresting and eliminate any sense of style one may develop. To top it off they are in alphabetical order which makes it easier to quickly glance over them.
c) The author seems to want to make you a parrot by telling you exactly how to respond in certain situations. She also often contradicts herself in these examples. She states to not say anything personal to anyone you meet yet reccomends a converstation starter as "you look fit, what do you do for a workout regiment".

Overall this book is a complete waste of time written by someone who I would never want to have a conversation with. She is so afraid of making a mistake that I would end up talking to her for an hour about the weather.

Conversations (at least socially) are meant to be fun, not exercises in safety. It is not the end of the world if you take a risk. It makes for a memorable conversation. I would avoid this book like SARS.

I put this audiobook in my Wish List several weeks before it came out. What I was hoping for was some good info on the psychology and execution of the lost art of conversation. What I got was an endless list of do's and do nots. I ONLY recommend this for EXTREME introverts. If you are looking to polish your social skills or socialize with anyone other than friends then keep looking.

The first 1 or 2 chapters of this book do indeed give you some good pointers on how to build rapport and to look for common threads, all very important parts of a conversation. However the latter chapters really get dull and tend to advice the reader to shy away from responding openly to real life situations such as when a friend approaches you with a problem, the author advices that you shy away from really putting yourself in their shoes and offering help, rather it gives you advice on how to decline offering help to someone in need. It also advices the reader not to tell jokes in any situation or to shy away from tellign detailed stories. Whilst for a social lepper this maybe sound advice most of us want to live in a world full of excitement and have conversations that are fullfilling for everyone, not just being a bore and trying to "fit in". Perhaps as an Brit this book is very American centric, but I'm sure even Americans are not even so boring!

The author provides savvy, helpful ideas on improving communication in all situations. Very good.

It's not that this isn't good book as you have to have it in today's society, its that its really written so men can know how to work with women or men with no male hormones. The points are vaid, but if you have ever worked in an al male environment then you would never need this. Men don't say, "You sure could have done a better job on that eyeliner." The say, "Hay, racoon, if you screwed that up any worse someone might be tempted to call animal control on you!" Another good example would start with, "Are you an idiot?" Ofcourse you can't talk to women this way as it would be rude and hurt their delicate feelings. So if you work for a women or in an office with a bunch of them, this would be a good reference. On the otherhand if you work with men of any stature, this would be just plain foolish.