Asperger's Syndrome and Adults... Is Anyone Listening? Essays and Poems by Partners, Parents and Family Members... [Paperback]

Karen E. Rodman (Editor), Tony Attwood (Introduction)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 15, 2003 | ISBN-10: 1843107511 | ISBN-13: 978-1843107514 | Edition: 1

The difficulties faced by people with Asperger Syndrome (AS) cannot be underestimated, but the emotional problems experienced by those around them - partners, family and friends - are often overlooked. Focusing on what is referred to as the Cassandra phenomenon, where the neurotypical partner often needs more emotional guidance than the AS partner, this volume gathers together letters, thoughts and poems to give voice to the loneliness, frustration and love felt by many individuals who are close to one or more people with AS. This collection provides the emotional support, insight and understanding needed to deal with the emotions that AS evokes within close relationships.

FAAAS Inc. (Families of Adults Afflicted with Asperger's Syndrome) aims to offer support to the family members of adult individuals afflicted with Asperger's Syndrome.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Karen E. Rodman has lived with a husband who was diagnosed in 1996 with Asperger's Syndrome and Tourette's Syndrome at age 69. Karen enjoys travel, her friends, photography, and facilitating "Polly's Place", a cancer support group. She is the founder and president of FAAAS Inc. (www faaas.org), the first website and organisation in the world that recognizes the need of support and validation for family members who are affected by the behaviours of adults with AS. FAAAS Inc. (Families of Adults Afflicted with Asperger's Syndrome) aims to offer support to the family members of adult individuals afflicted with AS. FAAAS Inc., a non-profit organization, also aims to educate the public to the existence of Asperger's Syndrome in the adult population and to bring awareness of this neurological disorder and its ramifications on the "whole" family to the medical communities who are directly or indirectly involved. Another key aspect to the work of FAAAS Inc. is to give the families a measure of reassurance so they can validate their concerns and frustrations as concrete issues rather than simple 'family problems'.

Product Details

• Paperback: 186 pages
• Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Pub; 1 edition (September 15, 2003)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1843107511
• ISBN-13: 978-1843107514
• Product Dimensions: 8.8 x 5.2 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8.5 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #555,796 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

24 of 27 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Is Anyone Listening?, November 4, 2003

By 

"tpitt54" (Melbourne, Australia) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Asperger's Syndrome and Adults... Is Anyone Listening? Essays and Poems by Partners, Parents and Family Members... (Paperback)

Rodman's book contains essays and poems by people living with an an adult who has Asperger's Syndrome. Some of the contributors are partners, some are parents and some are siblings. (The only group not represented is those who grew up with an Asperger's parent.)

This is the first book to illustrate the tremendous difficulties and deep emotional pain faced by the families of Asperger's sufferers. Help in many forms is now available for the sufferers themselves, but very little support or compassion is available for their spouses and families, who often struggle with soul-searing loneliness, frustration, loss of self-esteem, bewilderment and profound feelings of rejection.

The following quote comes from Rodman's own essay:

"Is anyone listening?... We, the families with our blistered hearts and souls and damaged psyche, are the end-product of undiagnosed and untreated Asperger's Syndrome. How many families are suffering out there? The feelings of rejection and loneliness plays a major role in the lives of the Aspergers' family. You and your feelings are not recognized by the afflicted person."

I highly recommend this book to anyone who is battling alone with an AS partner, parent or sibling. You will discover that you are not alone any longer.

I also recommend it strongly to all psychologists, psychiatrists, counsellors and other professionals who deal with AS. Many of them have absolutely no idea what the families are going through. It is time these voices were heard.

24 of 28 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars We're listening...and hearing, December 21, 2005

By 

Gina Pera "Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.?, a... (San Francisco Bay Area, United States) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)   

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This review is from: Asperger's Syndrome and Adults... Is Anyone Listening? Essays and Poems by Partners, Parents and Family Members... (Paperback)

This book is a gem. This and Tony Attwood's book Asperger Syndrome are key to understanding what happens when Asperger's is neither detected nor understood. Lots of heartbreak, endless hurt, and confusion all the way around.

Do therapists know about this? Probably a little less than they know about adult AD/HD, which is darn little. Yet, AD/HD and AS are frequent traveling companions.

In my volunteer work moderating support groups for the partners of people with ADHD, I've learned that it's the people in the trenches (e.g. the people in these relationships) who must do the educating. They must talk to each other, compare notes, read what the top experts have to say, and not wait for any therapist or doctor to name their plight, much less help guide them out of it.

Most times, it just won't happen. Asperger's will be completely missed. You'll be told you have "communication issues" or that one is "frozen in his/her feelings, probably from childhood trauma" or any of a number of psychotherapeutic explanations that take no account of brain structure or brain chemistry. End result will be confused with cause. And, nothing will change. it could even get worse, as both partners labor under the illusion that the others' behavior is intentionally hurtful or deliberately "abusive."

These stories smack of heartfelt truth and vividly bring to life the many aspects of Asperger's Syndrome. Even if you've never heard of AS or think you don't know of anyone with it, chances are you do and just never made the connection.

Karen Rodman along with the FAAAS website and organization she founded perform a great public service.

Gina Pera, author and advocate
Is It You, Me, or Adult A.D.D.? Stoppingthe Roller Coaster When Someone You Love Has Attention Deficit Disorder
Winner - 2008 Psychology Book of the Year, ForeWord Magazine

16 of 18 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Thank you for this book!!, December 25, 2005

By 

Asperger family member (Alberta, Canada) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Asperger's Syndrome and Adults... Is Anyone Listening? Essays and Poems by Partners, Parents and Family Members... (Paperback)

Having a son with Asperger's Syndrome as well as a husband with Aspergers Syndrome, I find that resources which shed full light upon our difficulties are few and far between.
It is tragic and criminal that people who have Asperger's Syndrome are so frequently overlooked by health professionals and labelled too "high functioning" to receive any health/disability assistance. It is also tragic that the families of such people are left alone to deal with the day to day struggles that someone with Asperger's Syndrome can suffer from.

This book clearly demonstrates that families, as well as the people with Asperger's whom we love so dearly, need much more help and support than we are given. HIGHLY recommend this book to families as well as health professionals who are working with Asperger's Syndrome.