Asshole: How I Got Rich & Happy by Not Giving a Damn About Anyone & How You Can, Too [Hardcover]

Martin Kihn (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: April 8, 2008

Nice guys, pushovers, soft-touches and suckers:

Tired of being walked all over?
When the waiter brings you something you didn’t order, do you assume he knows best?
Are you ready to demand the respect you deserve?

Martin Kihn doesn’t care what your answers are, because of course you need this book. Watch and learn as this one-time softy transforms himself into a lean, mean a-hole machine.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

This strange, semi-parodic business self-help memoir from author and journalist Kihn (formerly of Spy magazine) details the writer's attempt to throw off, at age 40, the nice-guy habits that were killing him ("defects like consideration, politeness, giving a fuck what you think") and discover the winning Asshole within. After setting some ground rules ("Things I Would Not Do," including substance abuse, adultery and smiling), Kihn finds himself a role model ("the Nemesis," a classic jerk at the office), a life coach (typical advice: "Walk bigger") and starts putting his philosophy into action. Laying out his narrative in ten steps, Kihn's "experiments" take him into the boxing ring, through dog training, into public confrontation and, naturally, toward wisdom, success and happiness. Kihn is generally funny, especially in goofy asides like "Meditation for Assholes" (affirmations include "I constantly feel a nameless dread which inspires me"), but, in keeping with the theme, he's often crude. Whether it works, ultimately, will depend on one's reaction to the ending, in which Kihn Learns a Valuable Lesson. Like an above-average Adam Sandler movie, this mix of racy humor and overt sentiment will probably get both a bigger audience, and less credit, than it deserves.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

Praise for A$$hole:

“A$$hole is remarkably profane, laugh-out-loud funny, and surprisingly sentimental. Marty Kihn is one Grade A A$$hole.” —Rory Freedman, coauthor Skinny Bitch

“Prepare to be riveted and to laugh out loud. What’s it like when the nice guy finally decides to take the bull by the horns to become like those complete jerks who seem to get all the girls, all the cash, and all the glory? Through humor and vivid storytelling, Martin Kihn takes you through that journey until he discovers an astonishing lesson.” —John Alexander, author of How to Become an Alpha Male

“A$$hole is the funniest business book I’ve ever read, with Kihn starring as the world’s most loveable asshole. It is also remarkably useful in a sick sort of way. If you want to get rich through fear and intimidation, and don’t mind hurting people along the way, this is the book for you.” —Robert Sutton, author of New York Times bestseller The No Asshole Rule

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 256 pages
• Publisher: Crown Archetype; First Edition edition (April 8, 2008)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0767927265
• ISBN-13: 978-0767927260
• Product Dimensions: 5.8 x 1 x 3.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #108,543 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Martin Kihn is a writer, digital marketer, dog lover, balletomane and spiritual athlete. He was born in Zambia, grew up in suburban Michigan, has a BA in Theater Studies from Yale and an MBA from Columbia Business School. His articles have appeared in New York, the New York Times, GQ, Us, Details, Cosmopolitan and Forbes, among many others, and he was on the staff of Spy, Forbes, New York and Vibe. Until recently, most of his writing could be called satirical or snarky, meticulously researched and office-based.
His third book, the soon-to-be-released memoir "Bad Dog:
A Love Story," changes everything.

In the late 1990's, Kihn was Head Writer for the popular television program "Pop-Up Video" on MTV Networks and was nominated for an Emmy for Writing. He lost to "Win Ben Stein's Money," decided to quit writing and got into business school. Ironically enough, the tragicomic world of American business, where everybody seemed to be speaking an impressive language that was not quite English, and not quite clear, provided him with a whole new vein of source material, and his writing career really took off.

Kihn's first book was a humorous expose of the consulting industry called "House of Lies: How Management Consultants Steal Your Watch and Then Tell You the Time" (Grand Central 2005), based on the three years he spent working for a large consultancy. The Economist said "a more entertaining book about business is unlikely to appear for a long time," and Salon.com called it "exceedingly smart and funny," echoing Publishers Weekly's reviewer, who declared the book "highly intelligent and deeply funny."

Former co-workers and pinheaded career consultants were less amused, however, spamming Amazon.com with one-star reviews and all but sabotaging the book's chances in the marketplace.

Enraged but unbroken, Kihn reemerged a few years later with a grotesquely satirical stunt-memoir called "A**hole: How I Got Rich & Happy By Not Giving a Damn About Anyone" (Broadway Books 2008). The premise of this reality TV-type firebomb was that a guy who is too nice to get ahead in business (aka Marty) decides systematically to turn himself into a pricktard and reap the rewards. Film rights were sold to Warner Brothers, where it is in development, and Booklist raved "Kihn's got a great ear for dialogue - and a comedic sense worthy of Second City."

For reasons that elude the Author, "A**hole" became a publishing phenomenon in Germany and Austria, sitting for months on the Der Spiegel bestseller list and causing his German publisher to proclaim him "the David Hasselhoff of satirical non-fiction." Notes from his legion of German fans lead some to suspect Kihn's gossamer irony was lost in translation.

Kihn is married to the singer-songwriter Julia Douglass. Her most recent projects include a series of brilliant one-minute animated songs about cooking called ChefDoReMi.com. After twenty years living and working in New York City, the couple recently relocated to Minneapolis, where Kihn works as a digital marketing strategist for a well-known agency.

The forthcoming "Bad Dog: A Love Story," marks the emergence of a mature writer at the height of his powers. At its heart is an intensely charismatic, terribly-behaved 90-pound Bernese mountain dog named Hola. After a shattering personal crisis, Kihn decides to train Hola and together they earn their Canine Good Citizen certification from the American Kennel Club. It's a journey of redemption, as together man and dog reclaim their lives by working toward a common goal.

More will be revealed about this memoir shortly. You will be able to follow Hola's pre-publication antics on Facebook (Facebook.com/baddogbook) and Twitter (@BadDogTweets). For now, Hola and her companion can guarantee this: There won't be a dry eye in the kennel. xo

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

13 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars It's definitely funny, but it has a soul too., April 28, 2008

By 

M. Strong (Milwaukee, WI USA) - See all my reviews

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This review is from: Asshole: How I Got Rich & Happy by Not Giving a Damn About Anyone & How You Can, Too (Hardcover)

Martin Kihn didn't set out to write the next War and Peace, but that didn't stop him from lavishing some real care on the writing and character of this book. I read plenty of heavy stuff and this looked like it would be a nice book to read as a light-hearted breather. I got that, but I got more too.

The concept of Kihn's book is inherently attractive to anyone who's ever felt like they're being taken advantage of because they're just too nice. Kihn had that feeling and decided to do something about it by making himself into this book's title character. That's the first thing that sets this book apart from a typical farce, it taps into an anxiety that is all too familiar for a lot of us.

The second thing that makes this book a lot better than it might have been is how carefully Kihn cultivates a sense of going on an existential journey. He hires guides and advisers, finally stumbling upon an acting coach as his most successful "guru." As you read, you pick up on subtle changes in tone as Kihn transforms himself from Beta male to the not-so-kind leader of the pack. Kihn packs the book with one funny scenario and description after another, but he always holds onto the core philosophical question about whether nice guys do really finish last. To find out the answer, you'll just have to read the book.

It's Kihn's ability to successfully marry the shallow with the deep that lifts this book above its station. So why just four stars? Well, it's still a book about attempting to be a jerk to make your life better. We have to leave some room for War and Peace.

Recommended for anyone looking for a light and funny read with a soul who can handle a generous helping of vulgarity along the way.

11 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars It's a parody, not a scientific essay, May 17, 2008

By 

Busy Me - See all my reviews

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This review is from: Asshole: How I Got Rich & Happy by Not Giving a Damn About Anyone & How You Can, Too (Hardcover)

This book isn't what I expected. I've read all of the how-to-deal-with-a-corporate-bully books. This time, I wanted one written by a bully to see how they think and why they bully nice people like me. This is a humorous, part fiction, part embellishment, part real life, part movie script parody of a "nice guy" worker trying to climb the corporate ladder while the "mean guy" steps all over him and gets ahead. The "nice guy" studies the "mean guy's" habits which seem to work at putting him higher on the corporate ladder while the "nice guy" is left behind. The "nice guy" adopts the "mean guy's" habits through various means which is pretty funny. Once I figured out that it wasn't what I wanted, I kept reading anyway because it was a good laugh. As an aside, my husband is kind of a "mean guy" at work and sometimes at home. I work with him, so I know that he is mean at work. I was laughing out loud as we were taking a long road trip, so I started reading him a passage from the book on how "mean guys" interrupt and talk over people to gain control of a conversation. Before I could get to the second paragraph about interrupting, my husband interrupted me and yelled, "How long is this going to take? I really don't like the title of that book. It offends me, blah, blah, blah." When he finally finished, I explained that it's only two paragraphs and it was funny and I asked if I could continue. He agreed, so I continued reading the passage when he interrupted me again, this time louder to tell me he interrupts me because I never get to the point. I repeated I had only one sentence left to read of the two paragraphs. He sighed and let me continue. Then I finally got to the part about a "real mean guy" interrupts constantly and gets louder with each interruption. He then yelled, "The reason I interrupt is because I don't like you holding me hostage while you read me this (expletive deleted)." I looked at him and said, "I'm right here, you don't need to yell. We haven't spoken for the first 100 miles of this trip and we have 200 more to go. How am I holding you hostage? Do you have somewhere else to go outside of this car in the next 30 seconds?" He recognized himself as what he is. Hmmmmmmmmm. We both had a good laugh. If you want a "scientific" book on why mean people are the way they are and what you can do about it, read "Taming the Abrasive Manager" by Laura Crawshaw.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A nuanced view of human aggressiveness, September 24, 2009

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Audiophile (Canada) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Asshole: How I Got Rich & Happy by Not Giving a Damn About Anyone & How You Can, Too (Hardcover)

I have often wondered why when two cultures come into close proximity the more bloodthirsty and ruthless culture acquires dominance. For example, the ancient Hawaiians, a culture that values family and peace, was very much dominated by the Tahitians after their arrival in the island chain. Tahitians had a tremendously Draconian system - the Kapu system - where even minor infractions carried the death penalty. That is what Martin Kihn is trying to figure out in this book.

Having been called out as a wimp, Kihn swings the pendulum the opposite way, and sets out to take on the persona of an offensively aggressive person. This requires much study on his part, and through a series of amusing "lessons," Kihn aquires the [...] persona to which he aspires. His research describes alpha behavior and its rewards. In the process, he learns that much of what Kihn had previously considered "being a nice guy" was actually just behavior that sprang from laziness and fear.

There is a fine line, though. When Kihn takes it too far, he discovers that offensively aggressive people find themselves isolated and depressed. Ultimately, though they may bully people for a while, offensively aggressive people alienate those around them to the extent that they make themselves obsolete. Human beings are an innately social animal, and while they do appreciate and respond to alpha behavior when it is backed up by actual expertise, they do not accept bullying. Well, that's what Kihn claims in this, an anecdotal account of a very uncontrolled, if fascinating, experiment.

Kihn does not discuss institutionally-sanctioned offensively aggressive behavior, as studied by Zimbardo, behavior that seems to be immune from the effects of the social mores that Kihn encounters. It would have been an interesting discussion, but obviously is not within the scope of this work.

Like all good humor writing, there is much more information in the undertext of this book than many a scholarly treatise will convey. Kihn is funny - very funny, as well as creative, thoughtful, and concise.

Endorsed by the writer of "The No [...] Rule," this book is a good covert expose of the bullying behaviors that seem to have cropped up, itchy and ugly, like shingles on the body of our early 21st century society. This book may just be part of the cure. Even just a little bit of cure will make me happy.

Narrated by Malcolm Hillgartner, who very much 'gets it.' Hillgartner's interpretation of the text added both explanation and further nuance to this joyously complex work.

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