Customer Reviews

Asshole: How I Got Rich & Happy by Not Giving a Damn About Anyone & How You Can, Too

5 star:		(11)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Martin Kihn didn't set out to write the next War and Peace, but that didn't stop him from lavishing some real care on the writing and character of this book. I read plenty of heavy stuff and this looked like it would be a nice book to read as a light-hearted breather. I got that, but I got more too.

The concept of Kihn's book is inherently attractive to anyone who's ever felt like they're being taken advantage of because they're just too nice. Kihn had that feeling and decided to do something about it by making himself into this book's title character. That's the first thing that sets this book apart from a typical farce, it taps into an anxiety that is all too familiar for a lot of us.

The second thing that makes this book a lot better than it might have been is how carefully Kihn cultivates a sense of going on an existential journey. He hires guides and advisers, finally stumbling upon an acting coach as his most successful "guru." As you read, you pick up on subtle changes in tone as Kihn transforms himself from Beta male to the not-so-kind leader of the pack. Kihn packs the book with one funny scenario and description after another, but he always holds onto the core philosophical question about whether nice guys do really finish last. To find out the answer, you'll just have to read the book.

It's Kihn's ability to successfully marry the shallow with the deep that lifts this book above its station. So why just four stars? Well, it's still a book about attempting to be a jerk to make your life better. We have to leave some room for War and Peace.

Recommended for anyone looking for a light and funny read with a soul who can handle a generous helping of vulgarity along the way.

This book isn't what I expected. I've read all of the how-to-deal-with-a-corporate-bully books. This time, I wanted one written by a bully to see how they think and why they bully nice people like me. This is a humorous, part fiction, part embellishment, part real life, part movie script parody of a "nice guy" worker trying to climb the corporate ladder while the "mean guy" steps all over him and gets ahead. The "nice guy" studies the "mean guy's" habits which seem to work at putting him higher on the corporate ladder while the "nice guy" is left behind. The "nice guy" adopts the "mean guy's" habits through various means which is pretty funny. Once I figured out that it wasn't what I wanted, I kept reading anyway because it was a good laugh. As an aside, my husband is kind of a "mean guy" at work and sometimes at home. I work with him, so I know that he is mean at work. I was laughing out loud as we were taking a long road trip, so I started reading him a passage from the book on how "mean guys" interrupt and talk over people to gain control of a conversation. Before I could get to the second paragraph about interrupting, my husband interrupted me and yelled, "How long is this going to take? I really don't like the title of that book. It offends me, blah, blah, blah." When he finally finished, I explained that it's only two paragraphs and it was funny and I asked if I could continue. He agreed, so I continued reading the passage when he interrupted me again, this time louder to tell me he interrupts me because I never get to the point. I repeated I had only one sentence left to read of the two paragraphs. He sighed and let me continue. Then I finally got to the part about a "real mean guy" interrupts constantly and gets louder with each interruption. He then yelled, "The reason I interrupt is because I don't like you holding me hostage while you read me this (expletive deleted)." I looked at him and said, "I'm right here, you don't need to yell. We haven't spoken for the first 100 miles of this trip and we have 200 more to go. How am I holding you hostage? Do you have somewhere else to go outside of this car in the next 30 seconds?" He recognized himself as what he is. Hmmmmmmmmm. We both had a good laugh. If you want a "scientific" book on why mean people are the way they are and what you can do about it, read "Taming the Abrasive Manager" by Laura Crawshaw.

I have often wondered why when two cultures come into close proximity the more bloodthirsty and ruthless culture acquires dominance. For example, the ancient Hawaiians, a culture that values family and peace, was very much dominated by the Tahitians after their arrival in the island chain. Tahitians had a tremendously Draconian system - the Kapu system - where even minor infractions carried the death penalty. That is what Martin Kihn is trying to figure out in this book.

Having been called out as a wimp, Kihn swings the pendulum the opposite way, and sets out to take on the persona of an offensively aggressive person. This requires much study on his part, and through a series of amusing "lessons," Kihn aquires the [...] persona to which he aspires. His research describes alpha behavior and its rewards. In the process, he learns that much of what Kihn had previously considered "being a nice guy" was actually just behavior that sprang from laziness and fear.

There is a fine line, though. When Kihn takes it too far, he discovers that offensively aggressive people find themselves isolated and depressed. Ultimately, though they may bully people for a while, offensively aggressive people alienate those around them to the extent that they make themselves obsolete. Human beings are an innately social animal, and while they do appreciate and respond to alpha behavior when it is backed up by actual expertise, they do not accept bullying. Well, that's what Kihn claims in this, an anecdotal account of a very uncontrolled, if fascinating, experiment.

Kihn does not discuss institutionally-sanctioned offensively aggressive behavior, as studied by Zimbardo, behavior that seems to be immune from the effects of the social mores that Kihn encounters. It would have been an interesting discussion, but obviously is not within the scope of this work.

Like all good humor writing, there is much more information in the undertext of this book than many a scholarly treatise will convey. Kihn is funny - very funny, as well as creative, thoughtful, and concise.

Endorsed by the writer of "The No [...] Rule," this book is a good covert expose of the bullying behaviors that seem to have cropped up, itchy and ugly, like shingles on the body of our early 21st century society. This book may just be part of the cure. Even just a little bit of cure will make me happy.

Narrated by Malcolm Hillgartner, who very much 'gets it.' Hillgartner's interpretation of the text added both explanation and further nuance to this joyously complex work.

I review only audiobooks. Check out my other reviews, then download, plug in, and never be bored again.

Martin Kihn, the self-proclaimed former "nicest guy in the world", found himself 40, with no money in the bank, but luckily for us, an engagingly-wicked sense of humor. This book of the author's quest to challenge his nature and exceed the triumphs of the Alpha Male in the business world (instructions fully laid out), comes to an unexpectedly fable-like ending. A great read, especially for anyone interested in the ever-challenging daily life of a New Yorker!

This is the funniest book I have ever read. Martin Kihn is a comedic genius. I can't wait for the movie!

I love Kihn's first book - a send-up of the consulting industry - and I think he's topped it with this one. If you like Stephen Colbert, you'll love this book - Kihn's ironic take on what it takes to be successful is almost too close to the truth (and explains why I am NOT rich). Check out the videos on his website, too.

This book book is insightful as it is unabashedly outspoken & hummorous. A fast read that keeps the movie skittering before your eyes. It's easily as good as "House Of Lies."

This book is another hilarious masterpiece from Martin Kihn. When I read that he put SMILING on his list of things he absolutely would not do / would cross the line in pursuit of his project (along with committing felonies), I was on the floor laughing for about three hours.

I've heard that this is a parody but there's actually some things to learn from this book. Not to mention it's funny as hell

I don't mean to "over-sell" this book, but I do a lot of reading, and this one had everything I wanted. As far as I'm concerned it is a masterpiece.

This is one of those books that had me laughing so hard, and so loudly that I consistently woke up every single person in the house on a nightly basis as I worked my way through each chapter. Kihn's insights, simultaneously hysterical and tragic, are all too germane to the world in which we live today, or so it seems. Brilliantly written and edited, filled with colorful, engaging characters, and incisive wit, we follow Kihn's protagonist as he attempts to find his way through the Machiavellian labyrinth of contemporary office politics. Kihn has managed to mine humor from a dark situation so many of us must come to terms with in the modern world - the fact that it seems our society is run by, and idolizes complete sociopaths.

With some of history's greatest A$$holes as role-models, Kihn attempts to transform himself from nice guy to total dick-bag, enlisting the help of a monumentally whacky cast of characters along the way. Kihn's narrative is both a cautionary tale, and a healing salve for the souls of those who struggle with the inequities of being stepped on by bigger, badder, and buffer specimens of the human race. This is a very thoughtful, powerful, and eloquent commentary that will have you shooting your morning coffee out of your nose with laughter.

In a word - Brilliant.

Five Stars.