|
|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
5 Reviews
|
Average Customer Review
Share your thoughts with other customers
Create your own review
|
|
Most Helpful First | Newest First
|
|
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
COOLEST CARNIVOUROUS COMEDY EVER,
By Dr. Christopher Coleman (HONG KONG) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Aztec Rex (DVD)
Fascinating new facts and speculations about dinosaurs are constantly being discovered. Birds are apparently descended from dinosaurs; some dinosaurs were warm-blooded and gave birth to live young, certain dinosaurs were feathered, and quite likely brightly colored, and so forth. But what remained entirely unknown until this production is our reptilian relatives' penchant for slapstick comedy. I haven't laughed so much since the Cenozoic! Bouncing cannonballs off their heads, the Latin lizards of Aztec Rex sure know how to liven up a human sacrifice! Don't say they have no heart! What's more, this film unearths important life lessons, such as: blowguns don't kill people, people kill people; just say no to drugs; and never, ever poke a tempestuous Tyrannosaurus with your trident!
AZTEC REX is like a Reese's peanut butter cup. "You got your Aztec in my Tyrannosaur! You got your Tyrannosaur in my Aztec!" Two great tastes that go great together...and eat Spaniards! (It just might be a clue that the movies is no longer available less than a year after its initial distribution, but if you like Camp, Conquistadors, and Carnivores, Aztec Rex is for you!)
3.0 out of 5 stars
Dinosaur flick bites off more than it can chew,
This review is from: Aztec Rex (DVD)
I don't often stay up till 4AM to see a dinosaur film, but this one followed Mel Gibson's "Apocalypto" on Spanish TV, in English and seemed to be a continuation of the earlier film. I got hooked, as sometimes happens with this type of basura-trash. I had my eyes opened to a lot of historical events which (by some lack of research on the part of historians) can't be found in any books about the conquest of Mexico. Read the otherwise excellent book by Hugh Thomas, and you'll see what I mean.
We know there were dinosaurs in North America (I saw some remains in Los Angeles's La Brea Tarpits) and apparently some of them lingered on a few million years more in the pleasant valley in which this film takes place. And of course, as is widely known, Hernán Cortez made his first excursion to Mexico with just six men, four of whom were devoured by angry reptiles. Of course some may doubt that the Aztec Empire extended to the beaches of Eastern Mexico, but I for one am willing to give the talented director the benefit of the doubt. A lucky thing it was that the natives all knew excellent colloquial Spanish, which oddly enough came through in English on this occasion... what a talent for languages the Conquistadores and the indigenous population both had! ...and with so many nearly naked and gorgeous maidens gallivanting about, who would want to return to Spain? If you saw "Apocalypto," you will know that the young men were in fine physical shape as well, and perhaps even more scantily attired than the maidens. Some of the other reviewers have given further details of this carniverous time-killer. If other, less talented directors (¿?) had seen this movie before turning out such films as "Jurassic Park," the whole history of the sub-genre of saurian cinema might have turned out very differently. Is there no justice in this world? Film students at UCLA and USA, please study this magnificent and entertaining effort carefully, and LEARN!
1 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Better than 100 million BC,
This review is from: Aztec Rex (DVD)
This movie its a typical sci-fi movie but delivers as what it is but has a few implausible things like a cannonball bouncing of the dinosaur's head. As for the CGI, its not the best but its at least halfway decent. They somehow resemble in appearance a cheap imitation of a Jurassic Park T-Rex and they are better than the dinosaur in 100 million BC but only worth one watch if you are bored and have nothing else to do.
2 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars
Mixing dinoses with sex,
This review is from: Aztec Rex (DVD)
Lovely man Cortez, a known Spanish pirate-conquistador, over smarted his fellows by feeding them one-by-one to local Mexican dinosaurs worshiped by indigenous population speaking Spanish fluently, told by a locally settled prist-himself a victim of the shipwrecking.
It could be sort of a nice children tale if not homoerotic motives well sustained with sexual demands on tribe-head daughter, and blooding instantly as dinoses were consuming their living food explicitly. Pro-colonisations film is a tragic comedy of an upper hand a true believer has got in any situation.
1 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars
AZTEC WRECKS,
By
This review is from: Aztec Rex (DVD)
Cortez and his merry band of conquistidors(all six of them)land by sea in a strange land and come upon a tribe of aztecs(ten males and three young women one of whom is the tribal leaders daughter. The conquistidors and the indians do not speak each others language but at least the viewere are lucky because they all speak English except at times when the Indians talk to each other and sub-titles are provided. These Spaniards are not here to explore and chart new territory but to pillage and plunder-they find a lot of silver but their plans don't go well because.......
...Well it seems there are also a pair of t-rexs' roaming around and periodically the aztecs offer the heart of one of their own to appease the beasts. This neatly explains the under-populated village. The movie version I saw was on Tv but it was pretty bloody but fake-looking and the movie does provide a truly LOL scene. One of the nicer Spaniards and the chiefs daughter are hiding from a rampaging t-rex in a tree and since it looks like they may not have much of a future because of the beast-they consummate their relationship right there in the tree. When you think about it it doesn't sound like a bad idea but it seems funny and odd at the same time. Aztec Rex is good as a time-killer-nothing more-nothing less. |
|
Most Helpful First | Newest First
|
|
Aztec Rex by Brian Trenchard-Smith (DVD - 2008)
Out of stock
| ||