Customer Reviews

Back in Control

5 star:		(33)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

Back in control is for adults who recognize more than one approach is often needed when working with some of todays' out of control kids. The author's advice and training explained in this book is often most effective with middle school age children having lost structure in their daily life through divorce, other loss of a parent or somehow just didn't receive the necessary social skills in the earlier years.

Back in control is also effective in establishing meaningful expectations with the very young, as well as help with effective interference and reconciliation with older kids involved in alcohol, drugs and other high risk or anti-social behavior.

Critical to successful correction of unsocial and out of control behavior is the willingness of the adults involved to follow through with the child in an effective and meaningful way. The principles presented in Back in control clearly demonstrates that when adults fail to effectively follow through and enforce their own expectations, then children are not likely to follow through and enforce those expectations on themselves. Back in control helps adults accept their part in helping the child let go of learned manipulative skills and other tactics characteristic of the out of control child.

Back in control is incorporated into anger management classes within many of our nation's juvenile court systems, agency services, classroom and other government and private child management training in many states. Awareness, concerning the principles in Back in control, can help facilitate effective support from various agencies through common ground communications with these agencies.

Back in control works comfortably in must do situations, as well as with other training principals presented by programs such as Cline-Fay's Love And Logic, Strategies Training Systems, Kids In Charge and many other principle based approaches to dealing with difficult kids.

When the situation demands an immediate response from the out of control child and nothing else has worked, Back in control may be the answer for you.

James Kraemer, Safe Schools

When my daughter was 14 she spun completely out of control. Runaway, drinking, drugs, sex. It was devastating since we had what most would consider a 'normal' home and family. A family therapist recommended this book to my wife and me. We took the subject matter seriously and applied it (some of it was painful to us... but we were learning how to deal with a child who was destroying herself). The results in some instances were immediate. In others it took some time. Eventually, we regained our home life and our daughter. Its been several years now and I am happy to say that there is hope. Our daughter is well-adjusted, finishing college, happily married and makes certain that we know she loves us.

I highly recommend this book to ANY parent who is dealing with a difficult child. The author puts the responsibility for behavior back on the child which takes the heat off of the parent. The ownership of behavior becomes the focus. Parents are liberated and free to love their child back into a positive relationship.

Advice: Don't EVER give up on your child. Find all the tools you can to help you help them. Start with this book. I know it works.

My 12 year old son was becoming surley and resentful and I was getting desperate. I bought and read a few self help books which did not help. Within a week of reading and applying the principles in this simple 10 chapter book, he was hugging me, saying I love you and opening doors for me. Almost a miracle! Since then, I've bought about five of these books and given them to friends and family. Just bought another one, and recommend it to you if your kids are screaming at you, calling you names, won't do their chores, lying....... That is if YOU are ready to admit you are 90% of the problem. :)

My family, kids teachers, and I highly recommend 'Back In Control' and 'Parent in Control' books written by Gregory Brodenhammer!

I do not know anything about what happened at the camp in Oregon
that the review Perry L Wilson from Anaheim, CA United States submitted. Its obvious to me that Mr. Wilson doesn't want to face the fact that parent(s) need to take responsibility for their own kids and 'not pass the buck' so to speak.
Whatever happened, I Pray that the family finds peace and forgivness.

Again, I highly recommend this book and the Parent in Control book!!
If you have a tempermentally difficult child(ren) or kids with special needs, the principals of theses books WILL HELP you learn to talk and manage yourself so that you can manage your difficult child(ren) day to day and still have some sanity. I have read many many books, taken classes, workshops, groups, councelling and this is the only program that we've had any successes with. The techniques and principles taught are applicible to everyone in the family because they are based on human tendancys and not just trying to force the kid to change. As with any program you take what you can use and what is applicable to your situation and leave the rest. Just for the record I have never concidered sending my tempermentaly difficult, special needs child(ren) to the camp mentioned in the other review, not because of the $$ but because I believe it is my resposibilty to stay strong and to train my child(ren) to become as responsible and productive an adult as they can possibly become based on thier individual needs and abilities.
IF YOU PASS THIS BOOK ON BY YOU WILL MISS OUT ON AN AWESOME PROGRAM THAT COULD AND WILL HELP YOU!
--> Remember you'll only get out of it what you put into it.

As an author / motivational speaker on child training, and founder of Restore Ministries International, I had no advice for those who asked me how to get their children BACK in control, that is, until I found this gem of a book. As the mother of seven wonderful children, I am approached daily by strangers who are amazed by my children's behavior and are asked to speak on the subject. I knew how to keep children in control, well behaved, happy, and obedient - training them from birth to be that way. But for those who waited until they got to the end of their rope or ran into crisis behavior, what could they do? This book is a MUST READ for every parent. Today as you walk around the mall, see children in restaurants and in the grocery stores that are totally out of control, miserable as they disrupt public gatherings, you wish you could pass this book out by the hundreds. My personal opinion is that this works because it has its foundational principles from the Bible, although it is quite clearly NOT a Christian book. The language was offensive to me, but showed how absolutely powerful the principles were that could tame children who were into drugs, sex and running away, which is our world today.

This book was so helpful to us. Our five year old had started acting out as soon as kindergarten started. He acted out violently towards us, himself and other people. We dreaded coming home each day. After being recommended this book, our lives are much more pleasant. We have had the best time with our son and no more arguements! This book is easy to understand and realistic in aspect! Real life situations are given which help you relate them to your life, not to mention that it explains WHY children act the way they do and WHY we act the way we do. A must have for ANY parent, not just those who have problems children.

Back in Control is a wonderful resource for dealing with arguing to outright rebellion. It gives a no-nonsense approach for overcoming the challenge of a child who argues, refuses to do chores, abuses drugs or alcohol, and children/teens who are physically abusive, without becoming an abusive parent. I have used the techniques in this book and have experienced a successful, loving, and mutually respectful relationship with my six children! This is a great resource for parents who want to get "Back in Control".

this book has changed the lives of everyone who has read it... i have purchased over 20 copies, and given to friends and clients, and refer everyone, who is having problems with their kids, young or old.... and have received flowers for the referrals.... i just bought 10 more.... buy it, read it... and read it again..... personally, i bought the book, when i started having problems with my 12 year old, he changed after i read the book.. he graduated valedictorian.... cant say enough about it.

This book opens a parent's eyes to just how lazy we can be. Gaining our children's respect for our authority as parents requires effort, especially if that effort was not put forth when they were young. Bodenhamer shows us how to do it, and lets us know that if we are unwilling to put forth that effort our children are the ones IN CONTROL. My children were in control after my divorce, until my sister (bless her) gave me a copy of this book. It took lots of effort, I was late for work many times for a couple of weeks, some of the "fun" things I liked to do were missed. However, in about four weeks life with my children became amazingly wonderful! This book not only changed my children's lives it changed mine. Over the past six years I have purchased at least six copies of this book and given them to friends, including new parents with the recomendation that if they follow Bodenhamer's guidelines NOW their children will not only love them but will RESPECT them for the rest of their lives.

A 17 year old young man I know is leading a successful life because of this book. His life was not going in that direction. At age 13, he was unable to stay in his class at school, and he had no respect for his teachers, his parents, or any other adults. He was starting to hang out with the wrong people, and he was getting in trouble with the law. School staff and parents designed a program that required him to come to school and stay in his classroom (except for scheduled breaks). Expectations were clearly outlined, and immediate follow through was made available to "help" him get to school and stay in class. There was no need for rewards or (negative) consequences, which had been previously ineffective anyway. Within three weeks he was attending school regularly, and staying in class. Within seven months he had gained two grade levels in math and English. The next school year he graduated from a restricted private school to a public school setting. He is now getting A's in some of his classes, he has a job, and he is responsible enough to drive the family car. His mother said that Back In Control saved his life.