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Beam Me Up, Jesus: A Heathen's Guide to the Rapture
 
 
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Beam Me Up, Jesus: A Heathen's Guide to the Rapture (Paperback)

~ (Author) "Pretend you're a Hollywood studio exec and you have a pitch meeting with a writer..." (more)
Key Phrases: smoke locusts, End Times, Jesus Christ, Taco Bell (more...)
3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)

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Frequently Bought Together

Beam Me Up, Jesus: A Heathen's Guide to the Rapture + How to Profit From the Coming Rapture: Getting Ahead When You're Left Behind + Rapture Ready!: Adventures in the Parallel Universe of Christian Pop Culture
Price For All Three: $42.84

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Editorial Reviews

Product Description

The wildly funny response to the Left Behind series, Beam Me Up, Jesus will help the reader navigate their way through born-again America, with tips on how to avoid being Left Behind, how to protect oneself against demonic locusts, and how to find a guide to class-action suits and post-Rapture therapy.


About the Author

Jim Gerard is an author, journalist, and playwright. His book, Celebrity Skin, was published by Avalon in 2002, and his book, Yankees S**K, was published by Chamberlain Bros./Penguin in 2005. Mr. Gerard has written humor for The New Republic, Travel & Leisure, Playboy, Maxim, and Cosmopolitan; features for The Washington Post, Salon, Details, New York Observer; and many other magazines, and has published fiction in The Boston Review and elsewhere. He has performed stand-up comedy in New York clubs such as The Comic Strip, the Duplex, and the Village Gate.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Nation Books (May 15, 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1568583273
  • ISBN-13: 978-1568583273
  • Product Dimensions: 8.1 x 5.5 x 0.6 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #100,583 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

    Popular in this category: (What's this?)

    #25 in  Books > Entertainment > Humor > Religion

More About the Author

Jim Gerard
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Customer Reviews

16 Reviews
5 star:
 (7)
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 (5)
3 star:    (0)
2 star:
 (2)
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Average Customer Review
3.8 out of 5 stars (16 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

 
18 of 21 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Humor on the road to hell!, May 22, 2007
By D. Kyne (San Jose) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
If you're one who believes that religion, regardless of its intentions, is largely man made claptrap then this book is for you. The author serves up an absolutely hilarious dismemberment of the whole second coming, end of times, rapture mythology that is metastasizing through large parts of American culture.
If you're a 'believer' on the other hand you will probably not be amused.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars comedy reaching cosmic heights, May 31, 2007
By J. Sherman (Boston, MA) - See all my reviews
Truly tears-in-your-eyes funny -- hip and smart. A little bit Bill Maher, a little bit Sarah Silverman, but still original and fresh. If Bill O'Reilly sees this, he'll forget all about Rosie and have material for the next 25 "Factors".
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Real Humor - It's Been a While Since I've Read Some, June 15, 2007
What passes for comedy these days (Will Ferrel vehicles, MTV Prank shows) makes an intelligent comedy lover cringe. Well, cringe no more. Jim Gerard's "Beam Me Up, Jesus" is the real thing. Gerard has an uncanny knack for finding exactly the right set-up for his seemingly neverending supply of punch lines. This book is a wonderful skewering of the evangelical right. I can't think of any single group of people who are simultaneously so self-righteous and so dangerous - and therefore deserving of such rich ridicule.

Jim Gerard has obviously read and been influenced by great humor writers like James Thurber, Woody Allen, and S.J. Perelman. But he is for our times. For all times. And with this book, for the end times as well.

I hope this is just the tip of the iceberg for Gerard. Something tells me there's plenty more where this came from.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews

1.0 out of 5 stars A very poor attempt at humor.
I should have read the description of the author: "Jim Gerrard is (a)...stand-up comic." Reading it is almost like listening to a bad comic tell bad jokes and not being smart... Read more
Published 25 days ago by Mafunzalo

5.0 out of 5 stars Witty Rapturemania
Jim Gerard takes a look at Rapture culture in an incredibly hilarious way. Gerard peels open the layers of Rapturemania with wit, sarcasm, humor, and facetiousness that are sure... Read more
Published 11 months ago by R. Blair Scott

1.0 out of 5 stars not very good
The impression I got of this book was that it was a humourous look at the Christian 'end of the world' or book of Revelations. But it just wasn't funny and was rather weak. Read more
Published 21 months ago by adead_poet@hotmail.com

2.0 out of 5 stars Not what I expected, and not in a good way
No, I'm not a Christian rapture-ist and I actually wanted very much to like this book. After all, the size and influence of the fundamentalist Christian movement in this country... Read more
Published on August 4, 2007 by Douglas A. Greenberg

5.0 out of 5 stars A Rapturously Funny Send-up of the End Times
"Beam Me Up, Jesus" by Jim Gerard is a rapturously funny send-up of the End Times, a user's guide and self-help manual for the Left Behind leaners among us. Read more
Published on July 9, 2007 by Michael Immerso

4.0 out of 5 stars a witty, biting, and irreverent satire of the Christian "industry"
Jim Gerard does for the Christian industry what Michael Moore does for the healthcare industry, except with more factual information, far more humor, and less personal tonnage. Read more
Published on July 4, 2007 by Bob Miglarese

4.0 out of 5 stars I`m a believer but I still laughed
I read this after perusing the splendidly hilarious "Who moved my secret?",also penned by Gerard.I consider myself spiritual and a practicing Christian in an empiric sense. Read more
Published on June 24, 2007 by Stephen De Fronzo

5.0 out of 5 stars HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!
I just read Beam Me Up in page proofs and I was bowled over. It's a laugh-out-loud Up-Yours! aimed straight at the black heart of the Christian Taliban and all those men and women... Read more
Published on June 4, 2007 by Selvaggio

5.0 out of 5 stars laughing out loud
"Beam Me Up, Jesus" reminds me of Woody Allen's writing: Clever, caustic, informed and insightful. It's been a while since I laughed out loud reading a book in public... Read more
Published on June 4, 2007 by S. Moore

4.0 out of 5 stars Very clever
If you think religion has held parts of the US captive --as well as many parts of the world, this book is for you.
Published on May 31, 2007 by Nightingale

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