Bearded Lady (Kindle Single) [Kindle Edition]

Mara Altman (Author)

Book Description

Mara Altman, author of the bestselling Kindle Single "Sparkle," returns to top comic form to address the problem every woman faces but no woman wants to acknowledge: facial and body hair. Her brave, witty memoir gives readers a rare, honest glimpse into the hidden world of lasers and razors. It begins in childhood, when Altman discovers that hair sometimes grows in unexpected places -- and that it's best to remove it immediately, or risk ridicule from 8th-grade girls. It continues into early adulthood, when romantically-inclined men make offhand remarks about her fine coating of fur. From there it's a hilarious, heartfelt journey from Barcelona to Bangkok in search of a cure, an explanation, and the perfect pair of tweezers.

After graduating from the Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism, Mara Altman worked as a staff writer for The Village Voice until 2007. In 2009, HarperCollins published Altman's first book, Thanks For Coming: A Young Woman's Quest for an Orgasm, which was optioned as a comedy series by HBO. She has also written for New York Magazine and The New York Times.

Cover design by Adil Dara Kim. Cover photograph by Christopher Lane.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

"Under the withering California sun, they wouldn't stop making a spectacle of themselves." There begins Mara Altman's comic odyssey to understand and eradicate the hair that won't stop growing on various, unexpected parts of her body--there, there, there, and yes, even there. There isn't a woman alive who won't identify with Altman and her plight. With uproarious self-deprecation and charming wit, the former Village Voice staff writer takes us from puberty to the present in a brave personal narrative that balances reporting and revelation. Not since Nora Ephron's classic A Few Words About Breasts has a writer been so achingly honest--or hilarious--about the cruel tricks nature can play on the female body.--Simone Gorrindo

From AudioFile

Product Details

• File Size: 116 KB
• Print Length: 46 pages
• Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
• Language: English
• ASIN: B007II00XE
• Text-to-Speech: Enabled
• X-Ray: Enabled
• Lending: Enabled
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #10,441 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
  • #6 in Kindle Store > Kindle Singles > Humor
  • #10 in Kindle Store > Kindle Singles > Memoirs
  • #51 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Health, Fitness & Dieting > Relationships > Love & Romance

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

38 of 39 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Simply put - Brilliant. March 9, 2012

By LDH

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

Mara Altman's latest is probably the funniest thing I've read since...Sparkle. I literally laughed out loud alone in my apartment from start to finish. This is exactly what every woman wishes she could say but is entirely too terrified to do it. She's even more honest in her writing than I am in my own head. She dares to do what none of us will and it's bold, to say the least. If you're a woman, if you have hair, if you're just looking to laugh yourself to sleep, please don't miss out on this. It's brilliant.

22 of 22 people found the following review helpful

3.0 out of 5 stars Bearded Lady, Funny but NOT at the same time. March 25, 2012

By ladylucious

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

I bought this book based on reviews that its funny. I wanted to read a comic book as a break. Don't get be wrong, she starts with humor narrating her experiences, trauma, and struggle of every women, the unwanted body hairs. But then, she deviates from her personal narration of her experiences to interviews. She gets into peoples opinion why is it ok or not ok to remove hairs and tries to get into history of hair removal etc. At this point when she starts interviewing, the book becomes boring, shallow and just an opinionated view of various people from beauty editors to academic professors. The book loses its humor and becomes a drag. Had she stayed and elaborated her personal experiences, the book would have been much better. The interviews and loose research on history of hair loses its charm. I gave her 3 stars because her narration at the beginning is so at ease to follow. As a audience I don't lose her as a story teller. She speaks to me directly at the beginning in funny ways but then she loses it midway and becomes boring towards the end.

I finished the book from start to finish in less than 2 hours on a Sunday afternoon. It is a short read.

27 of 28 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars "hairy-go-lucky" March 9, 2012

By S. Richards TOP 500 REVIEWER

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

For women, there is a quest to be hairless and fuzz free, smooth and beautiful, but some of us just have it harder than others. The author is coming clean here, confessing to her soon-to-be husband (and to us) that she is more than she appears; she is a bearded lady in disguise. She even discloses the little happy trail and the nipple hair dilemma, and I had a good laugh at that.

As a woman who unfortunately also has an absurd amount of body hair herself, I found great humor and sympathy in this kindle single. I laughed and I identified way too much with Altman's struggle. I was feeling her pain. Her story is very personal and funny and bold. And what I see most of all in this memoir is a camaraderie among women, that laugh at you and at me, as we see and recognize a piece of ourselves and our own hapless vanity.

I was amazed at her bravery and gutsy honesty. Altman just let it all out, the truth in all its natural and hairy glory for everyone to see, and I appreciated that. The writing here is kind of tongue in cheek but still sharp. Even as certain details are painfully embarrassing, there is still an almost gentle, have-a-laugh-at-my-expense humor to the piece. Smart and funny writing with a drollness to it, this kindle single is very enjoyable, and I couldn't help but see myself in it.

Note: 780 kindle locations, and there is some adult language within.

More About the Author

Mara Altman writes about issues that embarrass her (i.e. chin hair), because she has found that putting shame on the page diffuses the stigma, leaving her with a sense of empowerment and freedom.

Over time, Mara has become progressively fearful of airplane flights, but less concerned with getting fat (in the Spring of 2010, she started to eat bacon). She feels most inspired when walking across bridges and lives the perpetual Catch-22 of not being able to go to sleep without first drinking a glass of water, but then having to get up to pee at 3 a.m. She reminds herself that things could always be worse. Then she's stuck thinking about all the bad things that could happen. And then she can't get back to sleep.

Mara has published two best-selling Kindle Singles. Thanks for Coming, her first book, which follows her on an adventure to find her orgasm, was translated into three languages - German, Spanish and Portuguese. The book was also optioned by HBO. Before going freelance, she worked at daily newspapers both in India and Thailand and was a staff writer for the Village Voice. She is currently dabbling in stand-up comedy. You can see a recent set here: http://bit.ly/11t3y11