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Becoming Dad: Black Men and the Journey to Fatherhood Paperback – June 18, 2006
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Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
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Top Customer Reviews
Of course, the issue of black fatherhood has been written about or discussed extensively before by sociologists, poets, psychologists, politicians, ministers and other learned individuals, but Leonard Pitts, perhaps, has done what many others have seemingly refused to do: he has allowed the fathers and the sons to speak and tell their stories. For who else knows this story but those who have lived it.
Although the story itself is Pitts' journey towards reconciliation with his own deceased father and his personal attempt to understand fatherhood, Pitts uses these as his foundation for a broader sketch, where the moments he captures are precise and real and brutally honest and where responses to Pitts questions open wounds which most who responded thought were healed. But that is Pitts'point; there will be no healing until those who have been hurt personally face the issue head on.
Black man after black man is allowed in Pitts' "Becoming Dad" to tell their story.Read more ›
I once heard a person say, "Real Men don't have to prove it." This certainly speaks of Leonard Pitts, Jr. He doesn't have to ask anyone's permission to be who he is and he doesn't have to prove to anyone else that he is a man. He is able to be vulnerable and strong at the same time. Those whose stories he writes are equally brave and candid. He is a man with straight-shooting, hard-hitting advice for a new generation of African American men, and some advice for women as well. His frustration with men who blindly accept the stereotypes placed on them by a thoughtless society comes through loud and strong. Men do have a choice. And women do have have a choice as to where they place their standards.
Because this book is aimed at African American culture, it will not have as strong of an emotional impact with those who are in a different culture. Pity, because strip away the cultural references and his message is one that needs to be heard by everyone.
Pitts speaks to other men in a focus group setting about their relationships with their children and the mother of their children. Some of the relationships seemed as if the father really did not know what to say or do with the children and some of the children felt who is the mystery man? My heart went out to so many of the men, women and children who never got acquainted or tried and failed. I believe that so many men make children and probably fallout with the mother of their children. So many men see the "baby mama" as an obstacle who makes them feel inadequate or uncomfortable.
I had a friend who fathered a child with a woman and had not seen the child in the tweleve years that the child has been on earth except for the day he was born. My friend received a letter one day from his son wanting to see him and my friend wanted to go out and buy everything in the mall for his son. I explained to my friend that money can't buy love and I said that the most valuable gift you can give to your son is history. I explained to my friend that he should tell his son where he came from, his family, and take the boy on a trip to see where his father grew up. The boy is curious to know about his father, but also about himself and so often we lose sight of that by purchasing expensive that could never fill the void of family history.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
This is as poignant and relevant to American history as are the many detailed chronicles and diaries of the American Civil War, if not a continuation of the same story. Read morePublished 16 months ago by SelectiveShopper53
Fast service. Awesome product. Would buy from seller again.Published 17 months ago by Leslie A. Alston
A very good read.....gives perspectives that could aid others in understanding the complex, sometimes tortuous facets of black men and fatherhood.Published 18 months ago by Amazon Customer
Extremely well written book. Mr. Pitts presents a thorough, compelling and balanced view of factors that impact how well or how poorly black men assume their roles as fathers. Read morePublished 20 months ago by C. Cullen
Well, I think every man should read this book, regardless of race. I thought I was going to learn about being a father, but I learned so much more about what it means to be a... Read morePublished 22 months ago by J. Burke
Describes in very honest human terms a national crisis that to date goes unsolved, ignored by our government and the main stream media but is the heart of restoring strength to our... Read morePublished on March 26, 2014 by anne baker