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Becoming Jewish: The Challenges, Rewards, and Paths to Conversion Hardcover – September 16, 2011

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Editorial Reviews


Becoming Jewish is the proverbial treasure trove of information about converting to Judaism, with facts, fables, and foibles all rolled into one well-written, well-conceived book. The two authors, one a rabbi, one a convert, write smoothly together, blending their viewpoints and deftly piggybacking on each other’s thoughts and feelings. A wealth of material covers everything from shopping for a rabbi, understanding Jewish values, learning about Jewish ideas on believing vs. belonging, studying Hebrew, honoring Shabbat, and celebrating the holidays at home to facing the Mikvah and the Bet Din. It also touches on issues related to raising Jewish children and brings to life the great love of the Jewish people for Israel and, especially, Jerusalem.

Meaningful anecdotes about Hanin’s conversion process and the new ways she learned to relate not only to Judaism but to a world that now looked different to her are sprinkled throughout the book and add a grace note of personal warmth to an already welcoming set of concepts. The book is well-organized and easy to follow. Reuben, a Reconstructionist rabbi, artfully explains the differences among the Reform, Conservative, and Orthodox movements and his own, honoring each in its own right and also mentioning trans-denominational Jewish organizations.

Appendices explain the syllabi of typical conversion courses, and a glossary provides definitions of common Jewish terms, including
tzedakah, Talmud, and sufganiyot. A resources section helps encourage Jewish activism by listing online Jewish magazines, such as Jewcy, museums of Jewish history and Israel-centered think tanks. Appendices, glossary, index, resources.
(Jewish Book World)

Conversion to Judaism usually occurs when a non-Jewish person falls in love with a Jew and the two determine that a common religious faith will make for a happier marriage. Co-author Hanin took a different route. She was already married to a Jew and was the mother of three-year old twins when she became friendly with a Jewish woman, attended her synagogue, and found there a sense of warmth that led to her conversion. Deciding to write about her experience, Hanin met Reuben, a Reconstructionist rabbi, who shared her views. The result of their collaboration is this wise and edifying guidebook to the process by which someone chooses to become a Jew. The authors spell out not only the steps to be taken, but also provide a wealth of information about Jewish traditions, practices, and customs. Their topics include: choosing a rabbi and a Jewish denomination; dealing with family and friends; observing the holidays; facing the religious court (Bet Din); raising children; anti-Semitism; and more. This second aspect of the presentation is so enlightening that all readers -- non-Jews and Jews, who can learn some unfamiliar aspects of their own religion – will find the book highly instructive. (Publishers Weekly)

Today, there’s general agreement at least that conversion to Judaism is possible, even if there’s still plenty of disagreement among authorities across the religious spectrum about what constitutes an acceptable conversion. Reconstructionist Rabbi Steven Carr Reuben and Jennifer S. Hanin don’t want anyone to let that get them down on their way to joining the tribe, so their cheery guidebook, Becoming Jewish: The Challenges, Rewards, and Paths to Conversion (Rowman & Littlefield, September) shepherds eager aspirants onward with sections like “Facing the Bet Din: Don’t Sweat It.” Most remarkably, this has got to be the only book ever co-written by an ordained rabbi published with a foreword by the incomparable Bob Saget. (Tablet)

Converting to Judaism is a long, involved process. This guide by a Reconstructionist rabbi and a freelance writer, who converted herself, is a welcome resource. The authors explain details such as finding the right denomination, choosing a rabbi, selecting a Hebrew name, and the need to learn Hebrew. They also discuss Jewish culture and beliefs, holidays, and traditions. Chapters on telling family and friends about the decision to convert, raising Jewish children, Kabbalah, anti-Semitism, and Israel help those converting understand important issues. There is also more doctrinaire information about facing the Bet Din (rabbinic court) and going to the Mikvah (ritual bath). Written in a casual, friendly style with good humor and warmth, this accessible guide will help anyone considering conversion to Judaism. (Booklist)

There is a long-standing tradition that, given the oppression that Jews have often faced, rabbis should make every effort to discourage would-be converts. Reuben (senior rabbi, Kehillat Israel Reconstructionist Congregation) and freelance writer Hanin, a convert to Judaism, by contrast, explain to the curious what conversion is apt to be like and address questions and issues that are likely to arise (Hebrew, Shabbat, kosher, Kabbalah, Israel, differing denominations). They instruct the reader on Judaism’s this-world focus and its status as a religion that emphasizes belonging over belief and the value of every person. VERDICT Short chapters and a simple style make this an excellent choice for interested readers and perhaps the first book any rabbi ought to hand a would-be convert. With a foreword by actor and comedian Bob Saget. (Library Journal)

An insistent lightheartedness and more than a few comic moments enliven Becoming Jewish.... Jewish readers will be surprised and enlightened by some of the details of the conversion process....Reuben and Hanin describe the conversion process with both sweep and precision....I expect that more than a few copies of Becoming Jewish will be purchased by Jews and handed to non-Jews in order to open a conversation about conversion. Indeed, it seems that the authors expected and intended the book to serve that function. But I am also convinced that the Jewish men and women who open and read the book will connect with traditions that they have forgotten or perhaps never knew at all. In that sense, the book offers a path into Judaism for both the Jew by birth and the Jew by choice. (Jewish Journal of Greater Los Angeles)

Becoming Jewish is a practical guide for those who are considering conversion to Judaism. It places a particular emphasis on contemporary American Jewish culture but also describes the historic religious tradition. The authors show great sensitivity to the concerns and questions of converts and provide helpful advice in meeting such a challenging life change. Topics include, among others, American Jewish denominations, finding a rabbi, learning Hebrew, telling family and friends, conversion study programs, facing the bet din, marriage and family, kabbalah, anti-Semitism, and Israel. The folksy, familiar style is easy to read. (AJL Newsletter)

Becoming Jewish deeply enriches the journey of anyone converting to Judaism but does so in a gutsy and refreshing way. I highly recommend it to those exploring paths to Judaism, those who are simply curious about the meaning of Judaism, those close to anyone becoming Jewish or those concerned with the future of the Jewish State: Israel. (Noa Tishby, actor/producer; founder, Act for Israel)

Reading this book is like having a relaxed conversation with a great friend who is willing to explain the real truth of what it means to become Jewish and to walk you through it with calmness and clarity. What a gift to be able to take such a complicated topic and make it accessible and manageable not only for new Jews but also for longtime members of the tribe. (Leonard Felder, uthor of Here I Am: Using Jewish Wisdom to Become More Present, Centered, and Available for Life)

Easily accessible, hip, and funny, Becoming Jewish is an excellent introduction and a warm welcome to Judaism. Highly recommended! (Ron Wolfson, Fingerhut Professor of Education, American Jewish University and author of God's To-Do List)

I highly recommend Becoming Jewish. It is a clear and concise discussion for anyone considering becoming part of the Jewish people. This is the book to consult and it will answer many questions for the spiritual journey. (Rabbi Denise L. Eger, president, Board of Rabbis of Southern California)

Written with clarity, wisdom, sunshine and heart, Becoming Jewish is an essential mentor for anyone embracing the Jewish family or exploring meaning and faith. A treasure trove for the soul. (Rabbi Klein)

At a time when outreach has never mattered more, a sensitive, thoughtful and eminently practical guide for those seeking to join the Jewish people. (Rabbi Steven Z. Leder, senior Rabbi, Wilshire Boulevard Temple; author of The Extraordinary Nature of Ordinary Things)

In a world filled with spiritual seekers, Becoming Jewish is an easy-going, accessible and warm hearted guide that offers insider tips while giving converts a license to laugh along the way. The authors’ witty approach helps converts synthesize a religion shrouded in secrecy with expressions, gestures, practices, customs, rituals and a language that dates back over 4,000 years. (Matt Miller, author of The Tyranny of Dead Ideas; host of NPR's Left, Right, and Center)

With the growing debate about the connection between Jewish identity and Israel, Becoming Jewish serves as a useful reminder to all those who question the two and why it is so critical to see Judaism and Israel in tandem through the lens of conversation. (Asaf Romirowsky, Middle East Analyst)

Throughout history, many Jews have pondered what it means to be Jewish, an identity that combines religion, ethnicity, culture, history, language and other complex factors. In considering what it means to become Jewish, and why one would make that choice, the authors shed insight not only into the conversion process, but Jewish identity itself. I highly recommend Becoming Jewish for both reasons. (Aaron Eitan Meyer, research diretor of the Lawfare Project; legal correspondent for the Terror Finance Blog; board member, Act for Israel)

We learn in Becoming Jewish that converts to Judaism are to be treated as though they were at Mount Sinai with all of Israel when Moses received God's laws. But, becoming a 'Jew by Choice' is not as simple an undertaking as imagining oneself in the desert sprinting away from Pharaoh. Becoming Jewish masterfully guides the interested would-be convert through the myriad of complicated issues and choices that they will confront. (William C. Daroff, vice president for Public Policy and Director of the Washington Office, Jewish Federations of North America)

Becoming Jewish is a must read for anyone who is considering adopting the Jewish faith. Rabbi Steven Carr Reuben and Jennifer S. Hanin, herself a Jew by choice, have created a spectacular work that provides a clear, accessible and reader-friendly approach to those seeking to choose Judaism as their way of life. Becoming Jewish offers a path full of wisdom that will be invaluable to anyone setting out on a Jewish journey. (Rabbi Naomi Levy, author of To Begin Again and Hope Will Find You)

About the Author

Steven Carr Reuben is Senior Rabbi of Kehillat Israel Reconstructionist Congregation in California, the largest Reconstructionist congregation in the world. He is an avid speaker, author of numerous books, including There's an Easter Egg on Your Seder Plate: Surviving Your Child's Interfaith Marriage, articles, and blog videos on interfaith issues online and in publications ranging from USA Today to The New York Post. He lives in Pacific Palisades, California.

Jennifer S. Hanin is a freelance writer, author, blogger, and a convert to Judaism. She is the author of What to Do When You Can't Get Pregnant and lives in southern California.


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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield Publishers (September 16, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1442208481
  • ISBN-13: 978-1442208483
  • Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 1 x 9.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (20 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #817,556 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Hardcover
Disclaimer: I have had both a conservative and orthodox conversion. I blogged about conversion for two years with a fair amount of success (and my now-closed blog still attracts 17,000 views a month). I tell you this to give a basis for what I am about to say.

This book is drivel. It has pervasive factual errors. I marked over thirty as bad enough to groan at. The rabbi may be a great reconstructionist rabbi, but he appears to have a superficial (and sometimes blatantly incorrect) understanding of Jewish tradition and law.

But for those of you who have read it, you need at least two very important clarifications. Most notably, you should know that the conservative and orthodox movements do NOT require ANY actual Hebrew language knowledge. You must be able to pronounce Hebrew text aloud, that is all. Not even quickly, for that matter. You do not need to be conversational in Hebrew. Yes, you will learn Hebrew phrases and words, but you won't hold a Hebrew conversation unless you want to learn that.

Secondly, I HATED the chapter about the beit din. You are NOT a failure doomed to never convert if you go to a beit din and they say you aren't ready. It happens to a LOT of people. It is not "rare" or limited to situations where you "whip out a BLT" or profess faith in Jesus. This chapter is not just misleading, but doomed to do significant emotional to harm people who will become good Jews, if not on that day.

And as for that foreword by Bob Saget... That is clearly pure marketing scheme. He basically writes, "This rabbi is awesome. I was born Jewish and didn't have to convert. Here are some jokes about stereotypical Jewish things. THE END." It's 1 page long. And then I quote the rabbi's acknowledgements section: "Accolades go to Bob Saget for writing such a brilliant forward."
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This is a well-written, thought-provoking, fun book to read if whether you are interested in learning more about the Jewish culture because of Jewish people in your life or you are considering conversion.

The information provided is thorough and given in a clear, easy to understand manner. It provides you with enough info to have a basic understanding of Jewish history, culture, customs, holy days, and the issues Jews are facing in modern times.

It's a book I will re-read and use as a resource in the future.
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Format: Hardcover
Wait...you WANT to be a Jew? No, you must be mistaken, sorry. Wait...you REALLY want to be a Jew? Look, forget about it, move along, thanks anyway. Wait...you mean, you're actually serious about this?

Well, okay then. This is the book for you.

I'm Jewish by birth, but grew up without any religious education at all; I only went through the B'Nai Mitzvah (adult Bar Mitzvah) training in my forties. It might as well have been a conversion, considering how little I really knew. I sure wish I'd had this book along with what my rabbis were giving me, because it's so well thought out. The authors are clear, concise, knowledgeable, and willing to have fun with the process. And there's really nothing more Jewish than having a sense of humor about it all, because you're joining a faith that uses humor not only to defuse pain, but to foster love and to make the deep arguments that are part of the Jewish intellectual tradition enjoyable rather than hostile. "Israel" literally means "wrestling with God," and being Jewish means that you are constantly in a challenging conversation with the creator. This book will help ease you into that conversation.
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Format: Hardcover
This book is so factually incorrect it's almost a joke.
If you are serious about converting to Judaism, do not read this, it is misleading and incorrect.
Please don't waste your money!!!
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Format: Hardcover
Where was this book when I was becoming Jewish!?! Becoming Jewish reminded me of all the things I take for granted today. It's a remarkably well written book that will make you laugh and put you at ease with all the practices Jews partake in. Whether you are converting because you are getting married, you fell in love with Judaism or you're already Jewish, you'll be amazed at how easily Judaism can be a part of your daily life. It was also nice to read a book that really gets what's like to live in an interfaith marriage. It's a must read!
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Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Detailed. Informative. A must read for anyone curious about Judaism or curious about converting. Check, even a lifelong Jew may want to read it as well as a refresher.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
This is the first book I have read about converting to judaism. It was an easy read and was very relatable
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
I read the library's copy of this book last year when I began to look into conversion. Now that I'm close to finishing my conversion, I wanted to own my own copy of this book. I love it, it is so well done and very helpful. I highly recommend it to anyone curious about converting to Judaism.
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