Becoming a Man: Half a Life Story (Perennial Classics) [Paperback]

Paul Monette (Author)

Book Description

Release date: May 25, 2004 | Series: Perennial Classics

A child of the 1950s from a small New England town, "perfect Paul" earns straight A's and shines in social and literary pursuits, all the while keeping a secret -- from himself and the rest of the world. Struggling to be, or at least to imitate, a straight man, through Ivy League halls of privilege and bohemian travels abroad, loveless intimacy and unrequited passion, Paul Monette was haunted, and finally saved, by a dream of "the thing I'd never even seen: two men in love and laughing."

Searingly honest, witty, and humane, Becoming a Man is the definitive coming-out story in the classic coming-of-age genre.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

Paul Monette first made a name for himself in 1978 with his debut novel, Taking Care of Mrs. Carroll, a comic romp with serious overtones. He established himself as a writer of popular fiction with three more novels before he and his lover were both diagnosed with HIV. In 1988 he wrote On Borrowed Time, a memoir of living with AIDS and of his lover's death. The passion and anger that fueled On Borrowed Time surfaces again in 1992's Becoming a Man: Half a Life Story, his National Book Award-winning autobiography. Although it follows the traditional structure of the autobiography and bildungsroman--early family life, education, reflections on how art influenced the subject's view of life--Becoming a Man also filters Monette's story through two central facts: the closet and AIDS. Monette writes of the pain of being closeted, the effect it had on his writing, and how it shaped (and often destroyed) his relationships. Monette's fear and fury at AIDS and homophobia heighten the same skill and imagination he put into his fiction. This vision--poetic yet highly political, angry yet infused with the love of life--is what transforms Becoming a Man from simple autobiography into an intense record of struggle and salvation. Paul Monette did not lead a life different from many gay men--he struggled courageously with his family, his sexuality, his AIDS diagnosis--but in bearing witness to his and others' pain, he creates a personal testimony that illuminates the darkest corners of our culture even as it finds unexpected reserves of hope. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Publishers Weekly

Monette responds to readers of his first memoir, Borrowed Time, by providing the flip-side expository of his life in the closet until he met his soul mate--the laughing man, Roger Horwitz. This memoir (which might more aptly have been titled Wasted Time ) is a bitter reproach of the 27 years Monette spent searching for himself. He explains that it took him years to realize that the homophobe is the deviant. Reading this beautifully written book, one feels as trapped by its dark mood as the author was by the closet. The writing is occasionally marred, however, by repetitive phrases, such as "playing courtier," "the closet" and the endless search for "the laughing man." The story also unfolds choppily due to frequent references to the future. Nevertheless, the book is a heartfelt illumination of how a gay person overcame the self-reproach that societal condemnation enacts.
Copyright 1992 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 304 pages
• Publisher: Harper Perennial Modern Classics (May 25, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0060595647
• ISBN-13: 978-0060595647
• Product Dimensions: 8.1 x 5.3 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (54 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #127,917 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #17 in Books > Gay & Lesbian > Biographies & Memoirs > Gay

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

30 of 30 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars poignant enough to alter the course of my life May 28, 2000

By A Customer

Format:Paperback

I'm a straight girl. I read this book when I was fifteen years old. Paul Monette's story was the most moving, heart-wrenching I have ever read, and his honesty, humanity, and incredible gift of writing made it all the more powerful. Being straight and young and female posed no barier to my empathy for him, or his impact on me. Since reading Becoming a Man, I have dedicated myself to gay rights; I have composed two articles on the topic of homophobia, started a gay-straight alliance at my high school, which is dedicated to the memory of Paul Monette, and become close friends with several gay and lesbian students. Monette's words and stories seeped into me so deeply that they're a part of me, a part of what I do, a part of the way I think and act. I consider him the most influential person to me besides my immediate family and best friends. I ache that I can never meet him and tell him how heroic and nobel I think he was. He is my favorite writer, and my personal hero for combatting oppression, ignorance, disease, and the suffocating trap of the closet, and for refusing to go quietly into the night. I recommend this book to anyone, straight, gay, closeted, young, or dying. No one will read it all the way through without being changed.

18 of 18 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Gone But Not Forgotten May 28, 2000

By carol irvin TOP 1000 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Paperback

Why would a straight woman want to read the memoirs of a gay man, the late Paul Monette who died of AIDS in the '90s? Because all you have to be is human to appreciate the passion and conviction this man brought to his life as he neared the end of it. Monette grew up in the Ivy League albeit deeply closeted. When he finally "came out", it was to discover the love of his life, Roger Horowitz. They spent happy years together until Roger first got AIDS and then Paul got it. Paul took care of Roger while he died from AIDS. His love for Roger is recounted in BORROWED TIME, AN AIDS MEMOIR, also by Monette, which I view as the prequel to this book. With this book, Monette went back to the time before Roger and his coming to terms with the fact that he was a gay man. He spent most of his youth in total denial. Monette was a good writer before he and his longtime companion contracted AIDS but AIDS transformed him and his work to much higher levels of art. This book deservedly won the National Book Award and many people felt, including me, that BORROWED TIME should have won it as well some years earlier.

15 of 15 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Moving, courageous, honest August 6, 1999

By A Customer

Format:Paperback

Like a previous reader, I read an older version of Monette's 'Borrowed Time' and hoped I might one day meet this wonderful man; it wasn't until I saw nfalzone's review here before reading 'Becoming a Man' that I realised Monette has since died. I also cried; Paul Monette really touched something in me and I can only hope that many, many more people will read this book, though I fear he is somewhat preaching to the converted. For those of us with gay family members it is a real eye opener, though I don't know that many parents would be able to handle this book. His story will drag you through so many emotions, not least anger; may Paul Monette rest in peace and may he be an example to us all to speak out, with open hearts and minds.