Customer Reviews

Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be: A 90-Day Guide to Living the Proverbs 31 Life

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Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be: A 90-Day Guide to Living the Proverbs 31 Life <Donna Partow, Revell, 2008> is a mixed bag. It has definite strengths and some distinct weaknesses.

On the plus side is Becoming's originality, readability, style, tone and format. Partow's style is brisk and engaging. Her tone is warm, congenial and passionate. Becoming offers readers numerous strategies for change in different areas including physical health, daily routine, family relationships, finances and spiritual growth in a format that's clear and easy to follow.

In the Beginning...
This book begins with an introduction featuring a Program Overview and "what you can hope to accomplish on this 90-Day Jumpstart." Areas include: Faith, Family, Fitness, Personal Appearance and Fashion, Finances and Retirement Planning, Household Management, Ministry, Business, and Self-Management. Also a "What You'll Need" List.

Chapters average three to five pages in length and are easily digested. Also included is a daily Scripture to memorize, a Bible passage, and a guided prayer, followed by Personal and Practical sections. Each week wraps up with a Weekly Check-Up, a Practical Checklist, and a Weekly Reflection and Evaluation.

Sound or Silly?
There is much to commend in Week One, Faith Foundations, and Week Two, Godly Habits. Chapters include discussions on Time Alone With God, Meditate on God's Word, Focus on the Positive as well as Becoming "Consciously Selective", Stay Planted in the Word of God and Devote Yourself to Prayer. However, bits and pieces of "excuse me?" seep in occasionally. Some readers may file the recommendations on Day 11, Sleep in Peace (p. 56), and Day 12, Be Diligent (p. 59), under Micro-Managing Minutia or Just Plain Silly:

"I'm sure the snooze button was inspired by the devil. It's his secret weapon against Christians... if he can get you to snooze away the thirty minutes you would have, could have, should have spent with God, the devil has the upper hand against you for the rest of the day." (p. 61).

(Various sources attribute the invention of the modern snooze button - a concept which may have been around since ancient Greece - to Lew Wallace, the man who penned Ben Hur.)

Insufficient and Curious?
Becoming the Woman God Wants You to Be stumbles in two areas: sourcing and biblical exegesis. Support from credible sources and/or credentialed experts in areas that form the backbone for plans, strategies, guidelines or assertions within this work is insufficient or M.I.A. It also offers some curious biblical exegesis. Since it is beyond the scope of this review to undertake an intensive page-by-page analysis of this book, we'll focus primarily on these two areas.

Sources?
Alert readers may want to give some of the sources noted in Becoming a second look before buying what they're peddling.

Take a look at Week Three, for example, Healthy Eating (pp. 68 - 88). Chapters include: Purge Your Pantry of Harm, Resolve to Control Your Eating Habit, Limit Your Sugar Intake, Eat Reasonable Portions, and Plan Ahead for Healthier Eating. Some great ideas and guidelines here, but a fair amount of this material is either attributed to sources with questionable or unlikely credentials (if any), or not sourced at all. In this week the author lays out what foods to eat and avoid, urges a ten-day vegetable and water only diet, and lands at Day 17, Limit Your Sugar Intake (pp. 74 - 77).

Day 17 references data from www.drbob4health.com/FoodsToAvoid. The information on this site is credited to Dr. Robert F. DeMaria, D.C. (Doctor of Chiropractic) of "Drugless Healthcare Solutions." The site focuses primarily on "correcting the spine and aiding the nervous system... so the body will draw upon its own ability to heal itself" - not on nutrition or healthy eating specifically. (Dr. Bob's Foods to Avoid list also includes: Chlorine, Liquid Candy, Milk, NutraSweet,(tm) Peanuts, soft drinks, synthetic vitamins, "genetically modified" food or food "containing modified organisms." The longer list includes pretty much everything on the typical grocery store shelf. "Dr. Bob" lists sugar as a "food to avoid," not "limit.")

Wouldn't a registered dietician or nutritionist make a more credible source here? Additionally, declarative statements such as the following cite dubious sources or appear to be unsourced (further information may be available in other Partow books or resources, but we're not reviewing the gamut here - just the single title noted.):

-- "The up and down motion of rebounding stimulates the lymphatic system, promoting more efficient cell-cleansing processes." (p. 101)

-- "In addition to eating right, one of the kindest things you can for yourself... is taking time to bathe. Did you know that bathing is important for your physical well-being? A shower may be convenient, but it doesn't accomplish the same degree of cleansing a bath can." (p. 104)

-- "A cleansing bath can purify your body from the toxins that have built up in your body. This is especially important when you start to exercise and eat foods that promote detoxification." (p. 104)

-- "Furthermore, if toxins are not rapidly eliminated from the body, they can become reassimilated." (p. 105)

"Points to Ponder"
Speaking of questionable sources, Week Six, Financial Planning (p.134-155) is perhaps the weakest part of this book. The author makes huge assumptions regarding income level, homeowner status, assets and liabilities, investments and the like. Partow tosses dollar amounts around like orbs in a pin ball machine. Often in the ten of thousands, these dollar figures may leave some readers shaking their heads.

Some readers may detect a sneering attitude toward "the poor and middle class" (see p. 139 for an example). The number of times the word "millionaire" appears in this segment borders on rapacious. This reviewer also questions the numerous "get rich quick" and "become a millionaire" schemes or proponents referenced. Again, sources such as Robert Allen, David Brach and Robert Kiyosaki are problematic.

In Day 51, Developing Multiple Streams of Income (pp. 189 - 192), Partow points out financial guru Robert Allen and his two books, Multiple Steams of Income and The One Minute Millionaire. A visit to Allen's web site includes the following:
"Robert G. Allen Is Working On His Latest Profit-Making Challenge And Needs YOU To Be One Of HIS Success Stories! Let me Teach YOU my Secrets to Creating Wealth The Multiple Streams of Income!"
This is followed by a "challenge application" which includes question #30: "Yes, I am willing to make a financial investment for this opportunity to work with Robert G. Allen." A quick "Google" of Robert Allen shows why he's earned the title of "con artist," "snake oil salesman," "fraud," and "scammer," among others. (Check out the Business Program Reviewer for one example. You can find more on your own.)

"Financial guru" and former Morgan Stanley Vice President, David Bach, author of The Automatic Millionaire, is noted in Days 40 and 79 and elsewhere. Click here for some feedback on Bach's figures and techniques:

http://www.thetaoofmakingmoney.com/2007/05/31/383.html.

What's Ringing?
"Scam", "fraud" and "one of the worst" are linked with Robert Kiyosaki (Days 37 and 51. Also see p. 139, etc.). Kiyosaki's 'Rich Dad' organization recently joined with the Russ Whitney Information Network, "a provider of postsecondary education focused on individual wealth creation and personal success." This organization's marketing activities came under grand jury investigation by the United States Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia in 2006. (http://www.ripoffreport.com/reports/0/226/RipOff0226341.htm. Information also available from: 2006 Business Wire, and the Gale Group.)

Does this ring any warning bells? If some of the sources for this portion of Becoming are dubious, marginally ethical/credible and possibly illegal, how sound are the principles and practices they promote?

Direct What?
In Day 52, Try Direct Marketing, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Pampered Chef and Creative Memories are mentioned (p. 193). Not mentioned is that each company requires a start-up fee or a similar capital investment, some of them hefty. Consultants for these companies typically offer credit and payment plan options to potential clients unable to pay cash for their purchases, contradicting Partow's advice in Days 38 and 39, Reduce Your Debt (pp. 141 - 144) and Pay Cash (pp. 144 - 147).

Look Before You Leap
The section on "Home Enterprises" (pp. 184-201) may be risky. Legitimate "work from home" businesses can be hard to find. These "opportunities" are rife with scams, cons, and rip-offs, so much so that they've spawned a secondary industry "exposing" the cons and come-ons. Look before you leap - or invest. (As noted above, Robert Allen and Robert Kiyosaki-isms referenced here may give cause for pause.)

Don't Forget
Also keep in mind that If you choose to participate in and practice all the routines and advice within this book, you'll need to buy:

- A personal notebook, daily planner, filelr paper, calendar, diverder, pocket pages, etc.

- Good quality walking shoes (p. 93)

- Nalgene bottles (p. 96)

- A rebounder (p. 102)

- "Cleansing bath" ingredients - p. 105

- A new mattress (if yours is 10 y.o. or more) - p. 58

- Lemons, cranberries, protein powder, ground flaxseed, etc. - see p. 104

- Ten plastic storage containers - p. 124

- A new wardrobe if your current one is the wrong color - p. 160 - 161

- Invest $500 in web site creation a la Internet Marketing (see p. 204)

And so on.

You'll also need to purge your accessories, personal care items, jewelry and get rid of most pants (if you're over forty - p. 168-169, pp. 171- 172).

In addition to dubious sourcing, readers may wonder about some of Partow's biblical exegeses/applications. In Day 16, Resolve to Control Your Eating Habits, Partow uses Daniel 1:11-15 as a basis for taking "the ten-day vegetable-and-water-resolve challenge." (p. 74a).

In its historical-cultural context, the Israelites were in Babylonian captivity at this time. They avoided food from King Nebuchadnezzar's table because it was considered contaminated, having first been offered to idols. Likewise a portion of the wine was poured out on a pagan altar. Daniel and his young comrades avoided the meat from the king's table due to the fact that ceremonially unclean animals were used and were neither slaughtered nor prepared according to the regulations of the law. Daniel "resolved not to defile himself with royal food and wine" (vs. 8) because of religious convictions. Coupled with Proverbs 31: 14-15, Day 16 seems to miss the point of this passage. (See Romans 14:2 for another view on eating vegetables.)

Also consider this statement from pages 75 - 76 (under Week Three: Healthy Eating):

"I find it fascinating that Adam and Eve both needed new outfits after demonstrating their inability to resist food temptations."

Is she trying to be funny? Apparently this is a reference to Genesis 3:21, where God graciously provided clothing for Adam and Eve to cover their shame, post-Fall (cf. v.7 and 10). Healthy eating is one thing, but attributing God's action of clothing Adam and Eve to a mere "inability to resist food temptations" is curious. It also trivializes the context and consequences of the Fall, the loss of moral innocence, and Original Sin.

Real Routines?
Check out some of the suggested routines, such Day 26 (p. 104-105). Here Partow urges readers to Purify Body and Soul by eating "cleansing foods." This includes a breakfast of "two eggs scrambled with vegetables (for example, broccoli, onion, garlic, pepper) or a protein shake made with one cup cranwater, one cup frozen blueberries, one-quarter cup frozen cranberries, one tablespoon flax oil, and one scoop of protein powder" (p. 104).

Can you just see a young mom with small children sitting down to a breakfast like that? "Not now, kids, Mommy's eating her cleansing breakfast!"

Yea or Nay?
Some women may find Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be a useful guide or tool. If fill-in-the-blank exercises, check lists, and step-by-step programs appeal to you, this is your book. Ditto those who need help figuring out how and what to wear, choose colors, accessorize, eat, exercise, "defy gravity," live within their means, and "implement the universal 80/20 rule" (from Italian economist Vilfredo Pareto).

On the other hand, readers may find dubious sourcing, flimsy or unsubstantiated claims and curious application(s) sufficient cause for pause. They may also take issue with matters of opinion, personal preference or taste which this book sometimes raises to the level of religious dogma.

Finally....
I've taken several Old Testament Literature and Inductive Bible Study courses on Proverbs 31 at the graduate level and elsewhere. I've also read a dozen-plus titles and numerous Bible studies on this passage. Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be is better than most. There is much in this book to commend. It also has some distinct weaknesses and problem areas. Be advised and take it with a grain of salt.

I have read all of Donna's books and eagerly awaited this latest title. It follows the same format I've grown so accustomed to: Scripture reading and memorization, guided prayer, my own personal prayer, a daily affirmation and practical suggestions on making the Word come alive. I love the 90 Day jumpstart titles she has penned. They help me to have a disciplined daily time with God, where I actually have to slow down and quiet down. These books are not to be raced through. And don't expect a major transformation at the end. As she points out, these guides are to help you get a "jump start"....to begin some new habits.

In this parpticular title, Ms. Partow takes a 90 day look at the Proverbs 31 woman. If you just read through those 20 or so verses in Scripture, the woman described therein is a dauting role model for any woman to live up to. But by breaking the verses down and taking a leisurely 90 day journey in getting to look at her, one has time to hear from the Father for one's self how to apply the text. If, as a result of jump starting new habits, you end up deeper in Bible Study or researching other ways to get out of debt, earn more income, declutter your home, balance your check book, discipline your children, be more loving towards your mate--then that's a good result! You will have opened up your mind and that's always a good thing.

There are good solid tips on financial planning, entrepreneurship, living a physically healthy lifestyle, being an organized and creative homemaker, a loving wife, nurturing mother, godly woman--all the attributes of the Proverbs 31 woman. The author does not force anything on you. In fact, she tells you in so many words to let the Holy Spirit speak to you as to what areas you need to focus on and in what ways.

The point of these books has always been for me an opportunity to spend more time with my Father, to get to know Him better, to hear His voice, and to walk by the Spirit in total obedience to Him. This particular book is a great start for all women to start on the path of becoming the unique women that God created them to be.

Cleansing baths to remove toxins
Bouncing on a rebounder is the "only way" to remove fat cells
Drink lemon and cranberry water - it will solve all your health problems (in conjunction with a 10 day water and vegetable diet)
20/80 - if you have 10 friends, be nice to all of them but only concentrate on two of them
Don't worry about a budget, she's never stuck to one for more than a month in her life and doesn't see why it's important.
Don't worry about tracking your money (that's obsessive, according to her) just make more of it!

If this is the type of advice you are looking for, by all means, go buy this book. For those of us who were looking for something based on Proverbs 31... try Emilie Barnes or Elizabeth George - you won't find that kind of encouragement in this book.

It's really deceiving... the scriptures are there. The prayers are good. And then she writes her opinions, which put down organizing and budgeting, and instead present ideas that have nothing to do with the scriptures she uses (she pulls one word from the scripture typically, to concentrate on), and some of which are just bizare on their own. At least one of her "sources" is a website for an infomercial.

This book hurts my heart - so many women bought it, craving christian growth in their own lives, and this book capitalized on that. There IS hope if you struggle with budgeting. There IS hope if you struggle with managing your home. Please don't give up just because this author doesn't believe you can change. A Wife After God's Own Heart, by Elizabeth George, covers a lot of these same topics, in 12 chapters, with biblical encouragement, bible verses that actually apply to the text, & little applications at the end of each chapter and may be a place to start if you are trying to Become The Woman God Wants Me To Be.

This book is your begining to a new way of life. This is the best guide to help you get to where you want to be. It will bring you closer to the Lord and help you become the woman you were ment to be.

I was introduced to this book by a friend who was going through marital difficulties. She was very earnest in her efforts to keep her family together. One of her battles - anger - had seemed to overshadow things at very inopportune times. During a time of separation from her husband, she asked her children, "What can I do to change so that Daddy will want to come home?" In surprise one of her sons said, "But Mommy, you already HAVE changed!"

I got the book and began my own journey through Proverbs, with the greatest ease. I love the assignments, the encouragement, the direction this book takes me on a daily journey. Eventually I purchased it for all of my sisters and friends in my Bible Study group. We are purging our homes, enhancing our health and lifestyles, drawing closer to our Creator and each other.

I absolutely love the format in which this book was written. The questions and checklists allow you to see how you are progressing. They allow you to see where accountability is needed, and you'll want to improve for the next week. The author puts into perspective what a woman needs to know about her spiritual growth. If you are spiritually weak, chances are, you are physically, mentally, and emotionally weak as well. This book is a great guide, very specific, and easy to follow.

I love this book! it's been helping me through so many things especially learning to take care of myself better. The only complaint that i really have is that a few of the projects to do aren't really something most of us can do in this economy. Right now we are really strapped for money and i'm not able to go out and eat just veggies and water for a week. It's too expensive, and i'm also not able to buy a rebounder. Other than that, i would buy this book over again if i had the chance, it forces me to organize my day better and make better use of my day. The perfect day is starting out with god and then accomplishing all my goals little by little each day and this book helps me to do that. why wouldn't you buy this book if it can help you become a better you?

Donna gives such a simple and practical approach to becoming the woman God wants us to be. It's not about following rules, it's about allowing God to work through and in us. Her message that God loves us and forgives us is easier to believe when we know that Donna has struggled just like so many of us to overcome sin. She gives suggestions on how to organize and plan our daily activities in order to serve God better. This book has made a significant impact on my life and encouraged a 40 pound weight loss. It has helped me to get rid of excess and simplify my life. Donna emphasizes the importance of daily time alone with God, and many other lifestyle changes. It's like a reference book that can be used time and again, especially when we begin to doubt ourselves and are ready to give up. This is more than a book, it's a challenge for the woman who truly wants to be a godly woman. The positive scripture-based affirmations are instrumental in my spiriual growth. Thanks Donna. 5 stars +

This book is so good that I'm doing it again - not because I didn't complete the 90-days, but because I want to make sure I didn't miss anything. It's not just a book - it's an adventure. I enjoyed it so much because it caused me to rethink my whole life. It is very engaging and it starts with small, achievable goals. I plan to use this book even after I'm finished my 2nd 90-day adventure. It feels so good to let go of so many things (purge), spend time with God daily and just get reorganized. This is really a great book! I can't wait to read the next one.

All I have to say is WOW!! This book is AWESOME! I just started it, but I am already seeing immediate results. Donna Partow is a GREAT Author & God driven Leader. You will love this book & you will start changes in your life quickly as well. I have more of her books on my wish list after I'm done with this one.