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Becoming Your Spouse's Better Half: Why Differences Make a Marriage Great [Kindle Edition]

Rick Johnson
4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (69 customer reviews)

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Book Description

Your Recipe for Marital Success

Having a successful marriage is not about finding the perfect person. It's not even about always getting along. It's about loving the imperfect person you married in an unselfish manner.

Just as a great meal is made from many ingredients, a great marriage is a combination of different traits. If men and women were the same, life would turn out pretty bland. In this witty and insightful book, Rick Johnson shows you how to go beyond merely tolerating your spouse's differences to using them to add spice and passion to your relationship.


"Rick Johnson understands the dynamics of a great relationship, and he's really good at helping others understand them too."--Will Davis Jr., author of Pray Big and Pray Big for Your Marriage

"Rick Johnson shows us how men and women are wonderfully different by design. His incredible understanding of how men think and how women think will give you much better insight into that person you married who sometimes seems like an alien."--Jim Burns, PhD, president of HomeWord; author of Creating an Intimate Marriage and Closer: Devotions to Draw Couples Together

"Conventional thinking wants us to believe that 'compatibility' is the golden key to a lasting marriage. But here Rick Johnson explains the real truth: it's our differences that make us interesting, engaged, and intimate."--Paul Coughlin, author of No More Christian Nice Guy and Married But Not Engaged


Rick Johnson is a bestselling author of That's My Son; Better Dads, Stronger Sons; and The Power of a Man. He is the founder of Better Dads and is a sought-after speaker at many large parenting and marriage conferences across the United States and Canada. To find out more about Rick Johnson, please visit www.betterdads.net.


Editorial Reviews

From the Back Cover

Your Recipe for Marital Success

Having a successful marriage is not about finding the perfect person. It's not even about always getting along. It's about loving the imperfect person you married in an unselfish manner.

Just as a great meal is made from many ingredients, a great marriage is a combination of different traits. If men and women were the same, life would turn out pretty bland. In this witty and insightful book, Rick Johnson shows you how to go beyond merely tolerating your spouse's differences to using them to add spice and passion to your relationship.


"Rick Johnson understands the dynamics of a great relationship, and he's really good at helping others understand them too."--Will Davis Jr., author of Pray Big and Pray Big for Your Marriage

"Rick Johnson shows us how men and women are wonderfully different by design. His incredible understanding of how men think and how women think will give you much better insight into that person you married who sometimes seems like an alien."--Jim Burns, PhD, president of HomeWord; author of Creating an Intimate Marriage and Closer: Devotions to Draw Couples Together

"Conventional thinking wants us to believe that 'compatibility' is the golden key to a lasting marriage. But here Rick Johnson explains the real truth: it's our differences that make us interesting, engaged, and intimate."--Paul Coughlin, author of No More Christian Nice Guy and Married But Not Engaged


Rick Johnson is a bestselling author of That's My Son; Better Dads, Stronger Sons; and The Power of a Man. He is the founder of Better Dads and is a sought-after speaker at many large parenting and marriage conferences across the United States and Canada. To find out more about Rick Johnson, please visit www.betterdads.net.

About the Author

Rick Johnson is the author of That's My Son; Better Dads, Stronger Sons; The Man Whisperer; and The Power of a Man. Founder of Better Dads, a fathering skills program, Rick develops and delivers father training workshops for businesses, churches, schools, and other organizations nationally and internationally.

Product Details

  • File Size: 325 KB
  • Print Length: 225 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 0800732502
  • Publisher: Revell; 1 edition (January 1, 2010)
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B00B853QCK
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #411,380 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
27 of 31 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Maybe this book won't reach everyone... May 10, 2011
Format:Paperback
I can understand why everyone doesn't love this book. This book is written from a biblical perspective. The basis of is to help a man and wife fulfill our God-designed roles within marriage as stated in the bible. I can see why people think this is backward and it definitely ruffles some feathers; but in light of the state of marriage in this country, I believe that we would all do well to heed Rick Johnson's advice. There is not a single place where he says that men and women are not to be equally valued. We have to bear in mind that EQUAL does not mean SAME. There are just some things that men do better than women and vice versa. When we accept that and fill our roles accordingly and to the best of our ability, marriages can become more harmonious. Society tells us that as women we shouldn't want to be taken care of, and that men shouldn't take a leadership role in their families. We have suffered as a result. This book is a great read if you are looking for christian, God-centered guidance in your marriage. I am already seeing results in mine!
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10 of 12 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Fabulous Read January 27, 2010
Format:Paperback
Rick Johnson has written a great book identifing the differences in our spouse that can pull us apart if we are not aware of them. He shows the reader that working to celebrate your differences and use them as strengths in your marriage is something obtainable. He splits our differences into 7 modes for men, such as the sex and work and 7 moods of women, such as the importance of girlfriends and nesting. The reading is easy and uplifting, with practical help, words and ideas to apply to your marriage right now. I love that he points out that if you are looking for the perfect person, to bad. You will not find that person here on earth. Yet if you look at your husband or wife, God created him or her to be the one that hones you and helps you grow closer to your spouse and God if you listen and respond to God. A good read and highly recommended insight to apply to any marriage, failing or growing!
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28 of 37 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars We had good discussion at least. May 19, 2011
By cmg
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I teach a young married Sunday school class in a conservative church, in a conservative town, in the middle of Kansas... and we went through this book with our couples. I hadn't read it prior to starting with the class. It started out pretty good but went downhill fast. The book is definitely from a "patriarchal" view where the men rule and the women are only allowed to cook, clean, and make babies; where the man lords over his wife and "allows" her spending money for the kitchen (he recommends this) and decides who she can hang out with (yes, really, he can pick her friends). The author is way over his head when tries to explain how women work and includes an entire chapter on menstruation and how this causes dissension in the home. I had hoped for a lot more than this.
Even if you hold a view that the man is the leader of the home, this book goes well beyond that and makes him the unquestioned ruler. That is not biblical. If we take Ephesians into account it says, "Wives submit to your husbands (which is where this book seems to stop reading), and husbands love your wives the way Christ loved the church (die for her)." There is no dying for your wife in this book, only telling her what you want her to do.
But we did have great conversations in class about the book (hence the 2nd star), its just that most of it was how we disagreed with what he was saying. True biblical marriage is much different than what is laid out here.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars This book has true insight. September 2, 2012
By lizz
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
I don't like long reviews, so I'll make it short.

On the sexism: I can see why people think this book is sexist, it does say a lot about men being the protector and decider. I also found it overly-religious (I can't stand religion) but just the same, this book had great insight on men and on women(I am a woman, and I found the part about women needing other women to mentor them extremely good advice for myself....) The book outlines the old fashioned marriage, where the man is the one with the power and the woman is the nurturer and the man's weak spot, so to speak. Although it is a little old fashioned, if a women doesn't want protection and to feel safe, what the hell are they getting married for? I do MMA (Mixed Martial Arts) and can defend myself, but I still love having my man stand up for me or wrap his arms around me because I feel safe. I think thats the only part that could be seen as sexist. Even if you hate the sexist part of the book, it is still an insightful book the rest of the time!

On the book as a whole: I read this book word for word like I was studying for a final exam, and it has helped my relationship with a guy I have been dating. We are not serious, but this book definitely made our relationship smoother even though he didn't read the book. Lastly, this book made me realize why the marriages I grew up around ended up falling apart. This is a great comfort to me because I feel like I am on my way to having the tools to support a healthy marriage one day, despite the fact that I have never been around one.

My favorite lesson from this book: A man and a woman can say the same thing, and mean two entirely different things. So instead of assuming the other person meant what you would have meant, ask them to clarify! I found this decreases arguing by about 80% . (The book definitely worded it better than I just did...)

For me, a must read. Hope this helps <3
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
great book
Published 21 days ago by Tinkmcandrew
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Haven't read yet
Published 1 month ago by Kim D.
3.0 out of 5 stars Stereotypical
The book has great insight into men's minds for women, However I found the women's section for my husband very stereotypical. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Brittney
5.0 out of 5 stars Great Book
Great book and interesting read!!
Published 2 months ago by Rebekah L. Greening
4.0 out of 5 stars Four Stars
Worth reading as it has good points for men and women.
Published 2 months ago by Paul F. Adams
1.0 out of 5 stars I wouldn't recommend!
We started to use this as a small group study. We were disappointed! My husband actually told me to stop reading it after the first chapter. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Carrie C.
1.0 out of 5 stars ... started out thinking this was going to be a great tool for my...
I started out thinking this was going to be a great tool for my marriage that was in trouble. By the end of the book...I wanted to throw it. Read more
Published 2 months ago by lbain
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Excellent as a check up and review for those married for a while as well as newly weds.
Published 2 months ago by docteacherrev
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
GREAT !!
Published 3 months ago by Lynn
5.0 out of 5 stars Keepin' it Real is the only way to go, get your copy today!!
I read this book while on my Cruise in the British Isles. Read it in 2 days. I love how it brought to life all the memories of mine and my hubbies memories over the past 20 yrs,... Read more
Published 3 months ago by Mickel
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More About the Author

Rick founded Better Dads, a fathering skills program, based on the urgent need to empower men to lead and serve in their families and communities. Rick's books have expanded his work to include influencing the whole family, with life-changing insights for men and women on parenting, marriage, and personal growth. Inspiring and equipping through innovative multimedia presentations and seminars, Rick's resources, methods and personal approach have been transforming the lives of men, women, and their families for over ten years.

Rick speaks at many large conferences across the US and Canada including MOPS International conventions, Promise Keepers Canada events, Design 4 Living women's conferences, and Iron Sharpens Iron men's conferences. He is a popular keynote speaker at men's and women's retreats and conferences on parenting and marriage.

He is a nationally recognized expert in several areas having been asked to deliver papers at venues such as the County of Los Angeles Child Abuse Prevention Conference and the State of New York Fatherhood Conference. Rick's work with men and fathers was recognized when he was invited to the White House as part of the "Champions of Change" ceremony in 2012.

Prior to becoming a bestselling author and speaker, Rick was a small business owner for 16 years, owning and operating an environmental engineering firm. He attended George Fox University receiving a Bachelor of Arts degree in Management and Organizational Leadership, and has a Masters Degree in Education from Concordia University. He is a veteran of the United States Navy, has served on the Board of Directors for several community and business associations, and coaches high school basketball in his spare time. Rick has been featured in many national publications such as New Man Magazine, Crosswalk.com, Christianity.com, Christianity Today's Men of Integrity, Relevant Magazine, Pentecostal Evangel, Thriving Family, and Proverbs 31 Ministries Magazine.

Rick has appeared on over 250 radio programs and television shows around the United States and Canada. He is the former co-host of a live, weekly radio show and a frequent guest host of other local programs. Rick is actively involved with the men's and family ministries as well as speaking from the pulpit at various churches.

Rick and his wife Suzanne have two (nearly) adult children and live in Gresham, Oregon.

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