Customer Reviews

Behavior Coaching: Step-by-Step Guide to Helping Your Child Improve Behavior at Home and School

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I really don't have time to read, but I wanted some ideas to help get more compliance at school from my 8 year old son who is displaying a defiant attitde at school. He was just diagnosed with ADHD. The authors offer specifc strategies to try that makes a lot of sense that I have shared with the teacher...without any annoying psychobabble. I have learned years ago that it is not just what you say to children, it is most important "how you choose to say it." There is quite a bit of help in this book for elementary school children. If you have a 2, 3, 4, or 5 year old in your home, I recommend an A-Z troubleshooting guide that became our bible when he was younger called "The Pocket Parent" which covers every challenging behavior you can think of in a similar easy read straight to the point style of "Behavior Coaching." Both books are loaded with excellent quick tips as well as long term understanding of a child's misbehavior.

All year my son has been getting yelled at by the teacher at school. He deserved it too - his behavior there and at home was awful. He talked a lot and kept distracting his classmates while the teacher was trying to teach. His teacher was so frustrated she asked the principal for him to be removed from the class. The school wanted us to "think about ritalin." I really did not know what I should do, and my wife and I were ready to try anything.

I got an advance copy of Behavior Coaching to review for my job, and after reading it cover to cover, I started to immediately employ what I learned - to great success!

Be Warned - Dr. Scott Hall and Matt Pasquinilli ask you to do a lot of work as a parent. Behavior Coaching is laid out in a very useful way. After the basic theory and techniques are described, there are pages that lead you through the process of "coaching" your child's behavior. There are convenient pages for you to record your "coaching sessions" so that you can refer back to them later. Very helpful. There is also a section that requires you to think about how you define character and behavior. This seemed a little cumbersome at first, but after going through the exercises, I felt more confident when talking about character to my son.

THIS BOOK USES ACTIONABLE DEFINITIONS

The authors are very clear in promoting the idea that you must describe what you want your child to do in very concrete terms. For example:

Instead of just saying to your child that he/she has to "pay attention" to the teacher, Hall and Pasquinilli say that you must instead tell your child to "look at the teacher, sit still, think about what the teacher is saying." Simple on the surface, but I had never heard it described that way. It works!

I am a 3rd grade teacher and mother of two 1st graders. I bought Behavior Coaching after hearing how effective the techniques were with a colleague's children. I knew I didn't have much time to read a lengthy book, but desperately needed help. I pride myself on gathering as much information as possible when faced with challenging situations. However, parenting and teaching seem to present constant challenges and surprises. I had read several books prior to buying Behavior Coaching. Most all had good advice, but were too heavy with research and/or the examples or were not relevant to my situations. I needed quick, specific ways to handle most challenges at home and school. Behavior Coaching does just that. The authors bypass all the fluff found in many books and give just what is needed. The 9 steps to behavior modification are easy to follow and apply. They take the quessing out of wondering how to use the points they give. I read the book in one night and gained a better understanding on behavior and how to work with it than any other book on the subject. The authors also provide solid information of character and its importance of reinforcing that with your children. The journal pages were also helpful for keeping track of my own situations. I highly recommend this to anyone interested in improving the behavior of children in any environment.

The book is concise with specific suggestions on improving behavior and building character with kids. There's not a lot of theoretical jargon (although the concepts are clearly tied to established theory). Many books that I've read force you to sift through references and studies to get any quick, helpful info that might be there. I also like the balance of direction with reflective questions. The book works.

"Dr. Scott Hall and Matt Pasquinilli have written a concise and complete account of how they get children to improve behavior at home and school and how you can get the same results with your own children." - I read this review in a local parenting magazine and so I had to have this book. I ordered it from Amazon at the beginning of February and immediatly put it to work on my eight year old son.

When my son began school, he had trouble focusing and staying on task. He never had a "behavior problem" according to the teachers, he just never paid attention. I had a lot of the same issues as a child, and I feared that my son would have the same horrible experience with school that I had.

We saw doctors and psychologists, tried herbs and diet modification, even did kid yoga. It all helped - a little. Behavior Coaching was the first technique that we used where my husband and I had to change how we were talking to my son. Now we are his "coaches" and he is making us prouder than ever.

My son't teacher said that when he comes to school lately that he is so much more focused that she is starting to see that he is gifted. What a joy and relief. Last year we were talking about keeping him back, now we are talking about putting him in the gifted program.

I never liked spanking and time outs don't work for someone who is not paying attention in school. Behavior Coaching gave us the words to use with our son and now we never punish, just acknowledge and recognize him for his success. Behavior Coaching is all about the conversation that we needed to have with our son. Don't get me wrong though, these are very short talks that pack a powerful punch.

I recommend Behavior Coaching to parents of children with behavior problems or with focus problems. There is alos a lot of great information on morals and virtues in Behavior Coaching. For Christian parents like us, this section was well received. Although no mention of religion can be found in the book, it is obvious that Dr. Scott Hall and Matt Pasquinilli believe in kindness, love, respect, and morality.

Thanks to the authors of Behavior Coaching for giving us a tool that works and for being concerned with issues of character.

This short easy read book is based on a sensible philosophy (much like the author's previous book called "The Child Whisperer") and has a variety of helpful strategies along with a supportive tone for parents and teachers working with schoolage children (ages 6-teens).

Interestingly, I did NOT find the majority of this book similar at all to "Supernanny" book which was recommended in the reviews that brought me to order this book and another book, "The Pocket Parent" in the first place. One of the reviews said that these authors--Jo Frost and Dr Hall "come from the same school of thought". I do not agree.

After having seen the "Supernanny" TV show, I was looking for some guidance that included very specific "positive" discipline tips for the common challenging behaviors my toddlers, 2, 3 and 5 year old present me with on a daily basis. I am sure I will refer more to "Behavior Coaching" as my kids get older.

However, for right now, I found exactly what I was looking for in "The Pocket Parent" which by the way is written entirely for parents of 2, 3, 4, and 5 year olds. It a more parent friendly A-Z guide (than the Supernanny) with almost 400 pages of hundreds of "sanity saving suggestions" from 2 mothers that have been there too--letting me know for sure that I am not alone with my often confused, stressed-out feelings of what to try next.

Highly Recommeded if you have a 2-5 year olds:

"THE POCKET PARENT: Hundreds of fast answers for parents of 2-5 year olds" .... and....

"SUPERNANNY" (covering issues relating to a larger age span)

As a father and an elementary school principal, I find that the techniques in "Behavior Coaching" are practical and effective. Not only do the authors give the what and how of what a parent needs to say to their child to create positive behavior change, but the authors also paint a bigger picture of building a relationship with your child based on love, moral values, and clear communication. I got a few extra copies for our parenting library at school.

Great book. Behavior Coaching is well constructed with information, theory, tips, strategies, and techniques that give the reader a guide for helping their child improve behavior at home and especially at school.

The guidance counselor at my son's elementary school suggested Behavior Coaching as part of a solution to our son's worsening behavior at school. After reading Behavior Coaching and implementing the advice from the book, we have seen a change in our son's behavior. Our son is in fifth grade and this is the first year he has had any trouble at school. I am excited to say that he is now back on track and the teacher called me to say how great he is doing now.

I also liked Matt Pasquinilli's other book, The Child Whisperer.

Behavior Coaching is a great book. My husband and I took turns reading this book over Spring Break. We were on vacation with our three kids and they were fighting non-stop. It was a good opportunity for us to try out the techniques in Behavior Coaching.

Just changing the way we spoke to our kids was hugely helpful. Within a few days, our kids seemed to calm down and start to get along better. This is our fourth family vacation in the same spot, and the first time we left for home relaxed and rejuvenated. School started up again last week and my husband and I have been using Behavior Coaching to zero in and change the habits of our youngest son. He had been diagnosed with ADHD at the beginning of the school year and has been getting in trouble for interrupting the teacher several times every day.

I got a note home yesterday saying that my son has made a dramatic change and is much more focused now. Behavior Coaching is my new favorite book.

"Behavior Coaching" reminds me of Dr. Mel Levine's "A Mind at a Time." Both books teach the reader to focus on HOW a child behaves and not get hung up on WHY a child acts the way he does. "Behavior Coaching" is a very specific, step-by-step apporach to building good habits of behavior. It works.