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The Belated Baby: A Guide to Parenting After Infertility
 
 
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The Belated Baby: A Guide to Parenting After Infertility [Paperback]

Kelly James-Enger (Author), Jill S. Browning (Author)
4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)

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Book Description

May 1, 2008

Approximately 7.3 million American women have struggled with infertility. Most of them, whether or not they use fertility treatments, do not realize that when they have their baby (or babies) -- whether through birth or via adoption -- the echoes of their infertility will be felt long after they are living out their dream of having their own baby.

Jill S. Browning and Kelly James-Enger explain that infertility is a mind-set and that every woman who experiences infertility is forever changed, even when she eventually has the child she yearned for. When many women who have gone through fertility treatments describe their experience, they say it "abused their soul." The experience may have also hurt their relationship with their husband and sometimes permanently altered relationships with their extended families. Studies show that even after the desperation of infertility subsides, emotional wounds still fester and an asterisk accompanies her bundle of joy.

Infertile women often find themselves mentally unprepared for motherhood. They feel they have no right to complain about the frustration and confusion that all new sleep-deprived parents experience. After all, they worked so hard to have a baby and, moreover, spent thousands of dollars for costly procedures. They also may be conflicted about working, even if their families need the income. She's waited so long for this baby. How can she leave him or her to go back to work?

The Belated Baby supports the message these women need to hear. It guides readers through the transition from being an infertile patient to parenthood, and it reveals how infertility shapes them as a parent. It will also be a hopeful source for couples currently in the throes of infertility, offering encouragement that there is happiness and life after infertility.


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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Jill S. Browning is a freelance writer who specializes in subjects related to parenting. A contributing writer with Chicago Parent magazine, she has written articles for Parenting and the Christian Science Monitor.

Kelly James-Enger has written five books, including Small Changes, Big Results: A 12-Week Action Plan to a Better Life, and more than 50 articles for national magazines, including Family Circle, Health, Redbook, and Women's Day.


Product Details

  • Paperback: 242 pages
  • Publisher: Cumberland House Publishing (May 1, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1581826109
  • ISBN-13: 978-1581826104
  • Product Dimensions: 8.3 x 5.3 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,165,207 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

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Average Customer Review
4.7 out of 5 stars (6 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars A profoundly validating account of the loss and hope surrounding infertility, July 1, 2008
This review is from: The Belated Baby: A Guide to Parenting After Infertility (Paperback)
I read The Belated Baby in one sitting often with tears in my eyes. Reading it felt like sitting with a good friend who has felt the pain and disappointment all women feel who have struggled with infertility. As a hopeful, waiting adoptive mother-to-be, I found it particularly helpful in foreshadowing what may come after our much longed for baby finally arrives. In one excerpt the author describes herself sitting in a coffee shop when an expectant mom comes in and sits beside her. When the author feels her body stiffen but her heart soften, I felt hopeful that someday I too will feel that brand of genuine joy for the happiness of other women. Knowing that it is normal for the disappointment of infertility to persist even after the baby arrives is a good lesson and reading the book before parenthood for the still childless couple is a great way to prepare for the emotions that are sure to remain even after children. Those of us who are infertile are going to walk again someday, and the arrival of a baby helps us to do that, but most of us will always walk with just a little limp---it's the battle wound of what it took for us to get there. The book was hopeful and sensible and validates every feeling I have as someone who cannot create children. A must read.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars A sigh of relief, May 27, 2008
This review is from: The Belated Baby: A Guide to Parenting After Infertility (Paperback)
I had tears in my eyes while reading most of this book. What a comfort to read about the struggles, frustrations, and (belated) elation of other women.

Infertility is a long, lonely struggle and one that emotionally numbed me to core. I feel blessed to have my children, but have lost myself in the process. The authors assuaged my guilt and gave me the stepping stones to find my way back.

This book is a "must read" for anyone that has ever taken the long, winding path to parenthood.

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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Supportive, Soothing, Honest and Wise, May 21, 2008
By 
Tina B. Tessina "Dr. Romance" (Long Beach, CA United States) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)    (REAL NAME)   
This review is from: The Belated Baby: A Guide to Parenting After Infertility (Paperback)
The Belated Baby: A Guide to Parenting After Infertility
As a licensed psychotherapist, I have counseled couples struggling with infertility, miscarriages, fertility treatment, surrogacy and adoption decisions. It's a long, painful road. Couples who ache to have their own children struggle with the mystifying lack of success, the difficult processes of infertility treatment, the ups and downs of hormone treatment, and the grief and frustration of trying and failing, over and over again. When they finally do achieve their dream of parenthood, the longed-for experience is colored by their painful history. The Belated Baby is written by women who have been there, and it pulls no punches; but it manages to be encouraging and helpful at the same time. The quotes from couples and individuals who are going through the struggle, and those who have been successful, through many different means, are instructive, supportive and encouraging. This is a survivor's handbook, which will be of tremendous value to any parents on this journey.
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Inside This Book (learn more)
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
belated baby, infertility survivor, domestic adoption, birth mom, secondary infertility
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
United States, Census Bureau
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