Customer Reviews

Bend Over: The Complete Guide to Anal Sex for Men

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This guide explains healthy and pleasurable living for all people including gay men. It addresses all of the inhibitions and blocks experienced by gay men and provides useful healthy suggestions for getting more out of life. Vielen Dank to Mr. Niederwieser.

Stephan Niederwieser is not only a fine writer; he is also a caring humanist. Practical, informative, tasteful, and with a good sense of humor he has prepared a manual complete with black and white photographs that addresses the existence of, the cautions about, and the instructions for satisfactory consummation of physical needs that could as easily be a manual for women as for men, as entry from the rear is popular in all sexual practices. But Niederwieser directs this illustrated volume to the male crowd, and the manner in which he approaches the psychological impasses, the preparation on the part of both partners in both the mental aspects as well as the physical aspects, addressing the fears as well as the pleasures and the varieties has never been available in such a relaxed and informed manner.

All aspects of the topic are covered - lubricants, self preparation with dilating toys, prevention of diseases (and what diseases could accompany this type of physical activity), positioning, myths, methods, legends, overcoming fears - and Niederwieser adds so much comfortable chat with his serious information that the reader will find this 'guide' as entertaining as a good read! As with any type of physical activity devoted to satisfying both partner and self there are zones that step beyond the usual and Niederwieser talks about these, giving references to those extreme versions of his topic, freely admitting that these activities are not his cup of tea! This is a smart, sound, clinically approved guide by a very wise coach. Grady Harp, April 11

Stephan Niederwieser is definitely someone I'd like to meet and invite to a dinner party. His droll, clever, sometimes outrageous, always consistent humor totally annihilates any comparison of this book to a scholarly tome or classroom text, yet the information is there and deftly imparted to anyone who may not be familiar with the actual pleasures to be experienced via their physical toybox. Even as a life-long veteran of anal sex, there were a few tidbits of information I'd either not known about or had let slip to the back of my mind. In general, though, for me the book was entertaining, hilarious, unpredictable, even vulgar -- but in the most amusing sort of way. Some of the potential hazards and even likelihoods that Niederwieser bluntly comments upon might create a "cringe factor," which novitiates to anal stimulation or those still in the fantasizing phase might use as an excuse to avoid exploring this aspect of their bodies' pleasure centers forever. If carefully read from cover to cover, however, Niederwieser addresses nearly all of the possible negative occurrences, along with the nearly unavoidable negative programming and alarming ramifications many must endure in order to experience anal sex for the first time. He then suggests the most practical and up-to-date manners of avoiding or dealing with these possible occurrences, which should set most un-hopelessly neurotic minds at rest. And once mastered (usually after the second, perhaps the third, encounter -- after that it's all about perfecting one's technique), think of the possibilities, the potential, the opportunities to double, triple, or more, one's pleasure?! I recommend the book to all, not just those needing a kick-start into the world of anal exploration and enjoyment.

Let's face it: anal sex to many is still consider a taboo form of sex although many engage in it. I personally know just as many heterosexuals who practice anal sex as gay men, if not more. So, as a gay man who has been involved in many kinds of anal sex over the years, both as a bottom and a top, I was happy to discover this book "Bend Over!".

Extremely well-written the book is a "know how" guide to pleasing oneself as well as partners in the joys of anal intercourse. For gay men anal sex is the one main connection between oneself and a lover or a partner and this book provides both a very intelligent way in obtaining pleasure from one of the best sex acts known to man. There were things in this book that I didn't even know.

Everything from knowing how to relax the sphincter muscles to breathing to dilating oneself before entry is discussed. STD's are also mentioned thoroughly so I thought that was a very important part of the book. Even knowing how to wear a condom properly is brought up.

A very tasteful book, if your starting out discovering your sexuality for the first time or a seasoned pro (like I am...LOL) this book is for you.

The writers have also written another companion book about gay oral sex that is also extremely informative.

Those who would see this book as disgusting trash on a taboo subject must have very tedious lives. While, overtly, it is a "how to" guide to anal sex, it's also about love. Of self, of others and why we bend to their pleasures as well as our own. Those who will find even a mention of "this sort of thing" beneath consideration won't read it and sadly, it's for them that this book was conceived. At base, "Bend Over" is about how we relate not only sexually or physically but emotionally to each other, and why we do so. It's carefully considered and eloquently written by an author who is first a proponent of people and only secondly a fan of sex. His thesis is that without one the other really isn't possible. But he starts with the self and re-introduces the reader to themselves allowing them to discover or think about things they may have never considered. Does it openly and candidly discuss anal sex? Yes. But, by then, the affirmatively minded reader will have given in to the author and will want to understand if not participate in what he finds to be a part of the healthy sexual ritual. One may not choose to add anal sex to their repertoire but at least they'll understand why others do. Finally, this is a book for the sexual being which is what we all are. Wry, carefully written and not without humor, "Bend Over" is as much a text for one's sexual life as it is for one part of the sexual experience.

I strongly recommend this excellent book, which changed most of my thinking regarding gay sex. Up till now I had a lot of prejudices but the authors' approach is human and emphatic because love, joy, nearness - not only sex - is handled in a way I never thought possible.
NOW I NOW IT IS POSSIBLE!
Thank you! This book changed the rest of my life.