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Bending Toward the Sun: A Mother and Daughter Memoir [Hardcover]

Leslie Gilbert-Lurie (Author)
4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)


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Hardcover, September 1, 2009 --  
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Book Description

September 1, 2009

"A memoir that takes us through many worlds, through heartache and noble hopes, through the mysteries of family love. . . . Read Bending Toward the Sun and enrich your life."—#8212;Rabbi David Wolpe, author of Why Faith Matters

A miraculous lesson in courage and recovery, Bending Toward the Sun tells the story of a unique family bond forged in the wake of brutal terror.

Rita Lurie was five years old when she was forced to flee her home in Poland to hide from the Nazis in a cramped, dark attic with fourteen members of her family. Young Rita watched her younger brother and her mother die before her eyes. But the tragedy of the Holocaust was only the beginning of Rita's story.

Decades later, Rita's daughter Leslie began probing the traumatic events of her mother's childhood to discover how Rita's pain has affected not only Leslie's life and outlook but that of her own daughter, Mikaela, as well. The result is Bending Toward the Sun, a collaboration between mother and daughter that brings together the stories of three generations of a family to understand the legacy that unites, inspires, and haunts them all.

Leslie Gilbert Lurie has served as president of the Los Angeles County Board of Education. Formerly an executive at NBC, where she worked on such hit shows as Cheers, Family Ties,Saved by the Bell, and The Fresh Prince of Bel Air, Gilbert-Lurie lives in Los Angeles with her husband and two children.

--This text refers to the Paperback edition.

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

The lasting impact of the Holocaust on a survivor and her daughter emerges in this joint account by Lurie-Gilbert and her mother. Lurie was five when a farmer agreed to hide her along with 14 Polish-Jewish relatives in his attic in exchange for jewelry and furs. While in hiding, Lurie witnessed the Nazis shoot a cousin and an uncle; her younger brother and mother died in the stifling, stinking hideout (years later her daughter, Gilbert-Lurie, wonders if the boy was smothered to quiet him and if her grandmother died of a broken heart). After the war, in an Italian DP camp, Lurie's father remarried to a stepmother Lurie resented; her father became increasingly depressed and remote when their fractured and traumatized family relocated to Chicago; and deep depressions haunted Lurie's own otherwise happy marriage. Gilbert-Lurie in turn recalls her mother's overprotectiveness, her career as a TV executive, a 1988 visit to her mother's childhood village and her own guilt, anxiety and sadness. Although the voices and experiences expressed are valuable, the writing is adequate at best, with none of the luminosity of Anne Frank, to whom Gilbert-Lurie compares her mother. Photos. (Sept. 1)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Review

“BENDING TOWARD THE SUN is . . . bolstered by writing that is compelling and sensitive, the book transcends the holocaust genre with its multi-generational point of view on the ultimate effect of fear and evil on young minds.” (Dick Wolf, Emmy Award-winning creator and Executive Producer of Law and Order; Law and Order: Special Victims Unit; and Law and Order: Criminal Intent )

“Here is a memoir that takes us through many worlds, through heartache and noble hopes, through the mysteries of family love and toward a beautiful, light filled conclusion. Read BENDING TOWARD THE SUN and enrich your life.” (Rabbi David Wolpe, author of Why Faith Matters and Making Loss Matter-Creating Meaning in Difficult Times )

“BENDING TOWARD THE SUN is a captivating memoir that explores a complicated, loving, and enduring mother-daughter bond, and reveals how doubts, hopes, and dreams are handed down from generation to generation. As both a mother and a daughter, I found it deeply touching.” (Arianna Huffington, author, syndicated columnist, and founder of The Huffington Post )

“Gripping, exhausting, exciting, devastating--this book is at times hard to read but always impossible to put down. ” (Rabbi Irving Greenberg, Founding President, Jewish Life Network; former Chairman of United States Holocaust Memorial Museum )

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 368 pages
  • Publisher: Harper; 1 edition (September 1, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0061734764
  • ISBN-13: 978-0061734762
  • Product Dimensions: 9.1 x 6.2 x 1.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #803,800 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

23 Reviews
5 star:
 (14)
4 star:
 (5)
3 star:
 (3)
2 star:    (0)
1 star:
 (1)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.3 out of 5 stars (23 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

12 of 14 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars A emotional memoir, September 1, 2009
This review is from: Bending Toward the Sun: A Mother and Daughter Memoir (Hardcover)
Bending Toward the Sun is a heart-wrenching, emotional memoir. Leslie Gilbert-Lurie with the help of her mother, Rita Lurie, shares their story of surviving through hell and back.

When Rita was just five years old, her family as well as their friends received orders from the Gestapo to report to the train station, as they were to be deported from their home town of Urzejowice in Poland. Rita, her family and their relatives vanished through the night. They left behind their home and possessions to seek safety from the Germans. Rita's family comes upon a good friend. His name is Stashik Grajolski. For two years Rita and about eleven other family members lived in Mr. and Mrs. Grajolski's attic. They eventually were able to make their way out of Poland and set foot on American soil.

Bending Toward the Sun tells this amazing story of courage, sadness, and family. I like how this book was broken out into three sections. The first section tells the story of Rita Lurie and her incredible journey. The next two sections are about Leslie and her daughter Mikaela with Rita. They remember their time together from the past to the present. I thought this was a lovely story. I got to know Rita and found her to be a nice woman. This was one memoir I was happy to read. It reminded me of The Diary of Anne Frank and The Hiding Place. Two really good non fiction novels. One thing though is that at the beginning as I was just getting to know Rita, I found all the people she came upon hard to keep straight. Other than this factor, I did like this book.
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Momma Hunt's Review, September 29, 2009
By 
Erica Hunt "Momma Hunt" (New Britain, CT United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
This review is from: Bending Toward the Sun: A Mother and Daughter Memoir (Hardcover)
Bending Towards the Sun is a great three generation biography. I absolutely loved this book. The history geek, oops I meant teacher, in me loved the true life holocaust story. The story starts out by telling the story of the Mother Rita and her time during the Holocaust in Poland. It is a amazing tale of her time spent in hiding and her life being a displaced person after the war. Sort of like the story of what if Anne Frank had lived. The story then goes on to tell the tale of Rita coming to America and the hardships she faced both with her past and present emotional issues. Add to this the sprinkling of her daughter Leslie biography on top. The book ends by discussing the enmeshed life that these two women and their granddaughter/Daughter lives.

What I loved most about this book was the in depth look into what life was life for holocaust survivors after the war. As a history teacher I have often become privy to accounts of what life was like for someone when they were in hiding or in a concentration camp, but not a lot is written about what life was like for this group of people after the war. What I also found fascinating was the look into how someones haunted past can not only affect their lives but also the lives of all the generations to follow.

I would highly recommend this book to any who loves biographies, psychology, or WWII historical writing. This was a great and emotional read. I would give the book a 4/5 the only reason it is not a 5/5 is I realize that not everyone would like the subject matter.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Honest and Gripping, October 7, 2010
This book has essentially three parts plus one smaller one. The first part is told in Rita's voice. She tells of her childhood in Poland, a country that was largely populated by Jews. Her village was virtually unaffected by the Nazi invasion for the first couple of years. When the S.S. army arrived in approximately 1942, everything changed. As a very young child she and her family stay in an attic for two years. As previously mentioned, Rita witnesses the death of her brother and mother. She is deeply affected by these deaths.

In 1944, when the Russians first conquered Poland, the families emerged from the attic and went from one Displaced Persons camp to another. Isaac, her father, remarries and they immigrate to the U.S. The second section of the book (according to me) is Rita's growing up years. The family lived in New York then moved to Chicago where she eventually met Frank, her husband. They begin their family life in southern California where they add two daughters and a son to the mix. Their children grow and Leslie, the main author comes of age.

Section 3 is Leslie's voice. She describes her mother's behavior and her own reaction to her mother. Both women are stunningly honest. A major theme throughout the book is that Rita never had a childhood and was never nurtured. It seemed that she sought nurturing from inappropriate sources, especially her oldest daughter.

*Psychological commentary: (I mean, really, you expected it, didn't you?) Given that Rita's most traumatic experiences occurred when she was between the ages of 5 and 8, every so often her interactions with others seem childish and disproportionately immature. It makes sense, however, that when Rita was feeling stress in her interpersonal relationships, that she would revert to the child who still longed to be nurtured. The scared, lonely little girl in the attic. Carry on.

It is clear that Rita is a survivor yet she does not have her own identity. She is vicariously living through her children. Leslie discovers the term "enmeshed" in her adulthood. Honestly, there were many times during this part of the book that I couldn't remember which was the parent and which was the child. Leslie finds that her childhood habit of collecting accomplishments carry over into adulthood. She is the overachiever who seems afraid to have any down time.

Meanwhile, Leslie is suffering from generalized anxiety. Sorry about that. I forgot to warn you that I had another psychological commentary. Leslie also takes a trip to Poland where she is background for a cousin's documentary. There she meets the woman who kept the secret of the Jews in her attic, walked through her mother's old house, and became more keenly aware of what her mother experienced. She also discovers that children of the Holocaust survivors tend to be the hyper-achievers. They also tend to carry the grief of their parents on their own shoulders and feel responsible for their parents' happiness.

Leslie eventually marries and has children. It is only when her own daughter suffers from extreme separation anxiety that Leslie sees the connection. Leslie tracks down all of her mother's living relatives who offer new insights regarding her grandmother who died and the uncle preceded her. She also tracks down her mother's stepmother who paints a significantly different picture of their relationship.

This is a stunning undertaking. I found the honesty in which the book is written to be painful and genuine. It is also striking to see the contrast between the perception of a child and the perception of those who were there and remembered things differently. Perception is reality.

The fourth little section is written by Leslie's daughter who is processing the burden she had cast about her shoulders without her knowledge. It is also discovered, at this time, that Leslie is still gathering her accomplishments by being on important committees. When she realizes what she is doing, she gives up her shield and concentrates on being a mother.

Leslie is able to convey facts and feelings without judgment. She shares herself openly for the reader, as does her mother, and she assigns her own meaning when crucial to the experience. Much of the time, however, Leslie is objective and open to interpretation.

An amazing journey.

4 and half stars.
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