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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
8 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
My Oh My!,
By A Customer
This review is from: Beneath Loch Ness (DVD)
Up until now I thought that the made for TV movie with Ted Danson was the worst anybody could do regarding the Loch Ness Monster. This mirky mess takes its place easily, hands down! First place! All the actors are awful, the dialog is beyond laugable and just sad, and the creature...oh that legendary creature! I have seen more realistic looking monsters in video games! It is not even CGI quality. (which has become very overused and overrated lately in cinema) There is nothing wet about the underwater scenes either. The so-called scots in the film are not in the least bit Scottish I am sure. Patrick Bergin is Irish, but even he is unconvicing. One of the greatest mysteries in our world is no longer the Loch Ness monster, instead it is how on earth did this get onto a DVD??
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars
There is Something in the Loch,
By
This review is from: Beneath Loch Ness (DVD)
As you can guess from the title, this is a sea monster movie. But this one doesn't seem to know what direction to take. It is almost like there were several script treatments that were jumbled together in the end.The Explorer Channel has funded a study of Loch Ness but the scientist in charge disappears during an earthquake. A new scientist is brought in to finish the story. The scientist is portrayed both as an incompetent figurehead as well as a knowledgeable researcher. The assistant bounces back and forth from complaining about the scientist's boorishness and being even more boorish. The local constable claims that anyone who has seen the monster is a total nut job (even after he has a monster in custody). In the end we wonder if they will run the story or not, and we really don't care. There are plenty of nagging details such as just how many hours can the diving gear be operated, sudden changes in day/night, and places where it seems someone edited out some critical scenes. The underlying concept is one that could have made a great film (I can't tell you without spoiling it) but the odd acting, lousy script, characters with no substance or history, and some very outdated CGI (looks like early computer game graphics) all combine to into one big dud. If you want a better film about Loch Ness, check out the Ted Danson version (Loch Ness).
9 of 10 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
Beneath This Mess,
By A Customer
This review is from: Beneath Loch Ness (DVD)
I would be hard pressed to find a movie that made so many bad decisions during the course of its running time. Trying to pass off the sunshine and brown mountains of California for the Scottish Highlands was a biggie. The weird antagonism and indifference of the "Scots" regarding Nessie was just goofy: these people owe their livelyhood to the tourists looking for a creature in the lake. And the sight of poor Patrick Bergin showing up with a Braveheart-painted face and a harpoon to battle the monster almost knocked the movie into parody.Unbelievably bad in almost every way. Will go down as the first horror film in which the monster was overheard saying, "Who do I have to have sex with to get off this picture?" Was it a mistake to pay attention? I've been waiting for years for a good Loch Ness movie. I'm still waiting.
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