Customer Reviews

Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup with Your Best Friend

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I stumbled on this book after I found the authors blog. I was having a difficult time with a friendship that had suffered yet another major disappointment. I didn't want to depend on other friends or my mother to help me work it out. This book was perfect. It's written by a therapist who has unique insight into the dynamics of female friendships. She talks about how the dynamics of female relationships but the majority of the book is about what to do when things go bad. It's not at all academic but there are some interesting facts and tips throughout the book for added insight. There are numerous examples and short stories of different types of friendship challenges that remind you how common it is for female friendships to have problems. She offers very objective advice on how to navigate through issues and offers suggestions on when to save a relationship, how to prevent issues as much as possible and what to do if it's best to let a toxic friendship go. She closes by discussing how you can use a bad situation to make better friendship choices in the future. I found this book to be invaluable and much better than trying to discuss my hurtful situation with other friends, my mother or even a therapist. On the surface it could seem like there isn't a need for a book on this topic but for any woman that has had a major issue witha female friend this is a very helpful, unbiased book. I gained a lot of clarity about the relationship that caused me to seek out the book as well as some other female relationships in my life. Ironically, as I was reading the book I began developing a relationship with a new female friend that I have lots in common with and again the insight in this book helped me feel comfortable getting to know this new friend and not feeling distrustful or negative based on my recent situation. I would highly recommend this book to anyone having a struggle with a female friendship.

As the mother of three grown daughters, I can testify that there are few issues that are more important to women than the strength of their friendships. Irene Levine has provided us with a very valuable book that I wish I had had years ago. It explains why our female friendships are so important to us, and when they are worth maintaining--and even more important, when it's okay to let go.

I will give a copy of Dr. Levine's book to each of my daughters as it answers so many of the questions we have mulled over during the past years: "How could she say that?" "How could she do that?" "Should I still go with her family for the weekend anyway?" The book is perfect for women of all ages!

This book came at a critical time in my life when I was trying to reconcile with a friend I dumped. Unfortunately, I didn't get forgiven and this book really helped me start on the road towards closure. Even though I was the "dumper" and have kicked myself many times throughout the years, reading Dr. Levine's book was a breath of fresh air. It was very non-judgemental towards anyone who has ever broken off a relationship with a friend for whatever reason, be it petty or justified. Needless to say, I highly recommend this book to anyone who has been dumped by a friend and to anyone who has broken off a friendship. There is a myth of "best friends forever" and knowing that it's just a myth and people change helps me cope with the end of my friendship. Thank you Dr. Levine!

Thanks to the mixed blessings of email and social networking, a painfully familiar scenario these days plays out like this: a joke or innocent aside is misread, the protest lingers too long in the sender's Inbox, and before you know it there's a full-scale flame war and hurt feelings. Online or in real life, it happens way too often to women a guy cares about: a sister, a girlfriend, a wife, or just a woman *friend* has a falling-out with her best friend.

This devastates the women at both ends of the breakup, and (probably without exception) will spill over into their other relationships as well. She might not say anything to Guy X in her life, but if Guy X is at all awake and observant he'll see the symptoms. Their footprints will be everywhere in her life, like mud tracked in on a light-colored carpet: depression, a short temper, sometimes substance abuse, emotional retreat, and (yeah) even a couple's sex life. You may think you know what she's going through; you may think you can talk or josh her out of her anxiety, fear, anger, and heartache. Don't be too hasty, though -- the operative word there is "think." (You may have noticed that women sometimes think differently from men.)

Dr. Irene S. Levine didn't just make up her observations from personal experience. She surveyed over 1500 women to get their take on the problems and solutions that follow the collapse of personal friendships. If you share the book with a woman in your life who's suffered this experience, not only will she feel less alone for having found good virtual "friends" in Levine and her survey respondents; she'll feel that way for having found a better real friend in *you*.

I had the great good luck to see Levine's book as an advance copy. If you'd like to get a feel for how she might tackle the issues, you might want to visit her "Friendship Blog" (http://www.thefriendshipblog.com/blog) or see her Friendship Doctor columns at the Huffington Post (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/irene-s-levine).

I am struggling with a "broken" friendship right now and this book had many a-ha moments. It helped me realize this happens a lot, and that it can't be all my fault. The many examples helped me to diagnose what might be the fracture in my broken relationship. I did appreciate the author's advice and guidance about when to "reach out" or when to just wait it out. The vivid point that women often don't want to talk about these "break ups" because it might reflect badly on their friendship abilities is something I am definitely experiencing. This was an easy read that flowed well and allowed me to make many text to self connections. I would recommend this book to: help you feel better if you have had a relationship break, guide you in how to be a better friend, and inspire you to reflect on what kind of friend you are and what you want in a friendship. Validating the struggles and helping guide the healing stood out for me when reading.

Everybody goes through different periods in their friendships.. sometimes everything is good and sometimes it isn't. Well, being randomly assigned to a roommate freshman year of college could have been one of the best relationships or one of the worse - thankfully, she turned out to be like a sister. Amazing memories were made throughout the four years at school; unfortunately this didn't last once we graduated. Unfortunately, things changed - living in different places, jealousy over different friends, or whatever the argument du jour was - our friendship became toxic. I couldn't understand what happened, but the more I thought about it, I realized there are constantly stories that I hear from others regarding changes in friendships - it's something that happens everyday to people! Well, I came across this wonderful book titled: "Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Breakup With Your Best Friend" - it has really helped me understand... some friendships last a lifetime, but when they don't it can leave you feeling frustrated, confused, and let's face it down in the dumps... it's not necessary to hold on to something that isn't working.. It's an amazing read. I recommend it.

I got this book as a gift this week and stayed up until 3AM last night reading it. If you are a woman trying to navigate the tricky and sometimes tumultuous waters of female friendships then run don't walk to get this book. I did a personal inventory of my friendships following the guidelines of this book and boy was that eye-opening. This book should be in every woman's handbag along with lipstick and other essentials. And no, I am not lending mine out!

I've been looking for a book like this one for several years now--I had a huge falling out with a friend several years ago, and have been bothered by it ever since. This is the first book I've ever found that actually addresses a friendship breakup as what it is--the breakup of a very close, personal relationship, and akin to a breakup of a romance or even a marriage in terms of how close two women can be and how much they share.

One of the really interesting stories in the book that resonated with me was the story of a single woman and a married mother who had been best friends for a long time, but then had a huge falling out when the married woman forgot the single woman's birthday, her reasoning being that it was an innocent mistake, and she'd been too busy with her child. It's so true that sometimes as we age our priorities shift, and without any malice we end up hurting the friends who have been closest to us. I'm really glad that Irene Levine has taken these kinds of "small" issues head-on, showed how they can create irreparable rifts if they are not treated carefully, and offered some strategies for trying to repair things that have gone wrong.

This book was given to me by a dear friend who knew that I was mourning the loss of my relationship with my best friend of 18 years. I found this book to be invaluable during one of the most difficult times of my life. The author helped me to realize that my feelings of confusion, anger, betrayal, sadness and loss were normal, particularly as the friendship was abandoned without explanation. I was amazed to learn that there were other women out there who callously walked away from a best friend relationship as if it never existed to begin with. This book has helped me to be aware of potential toxic friendships and to steer clear of those. Thanks to this book, I was able to mourn the loss of my "bff" and move on to healthier, happier, more nurturing friendships.

Our book club recently read Best Friends Forever: Surviving a Break Up with Your Best Friend by Irene Levine. We had the good fortune of having Dr. Levine as a guest at our book club meeting. As a result, we had one of the livliest and participatory discussions ever. Each of us found the vignettes and case studies in the book so relatable. Whatever one needs to nurture or even end a friendship are addressed in Dr. Levine's handy guide.