Customer Reviews

Best Sex Writing 2010

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A thoughtful and provocative collection that gathers writers from the print and on-line worlds to tackle the year's biggest topics in sex. Very little of what appears here can be classed as erotica, though if you prefer to spend time between the sheets with someone who has something between their ears, this is the book you should pick up.

It's the nature of anthologies to be uneven, and this is no exception. There's a welcome breadth of identities represented here, with some common themes sounded: the still contentious role of sex education in the United States (especially the outgoing administration's relentless pushing of "abstinence only" curricula), the ongoing struggle against AIDS, the absurdities of many of the current sex laws, and the various ways in which women's bodies and identities remain subject to societal controls.

Several of the pieces still bear the clear imprint of where they were first published: David Black's tour through the LA Swinger's community mingles sex scenes and a few soft facts in in just the proportions you would expect from a Playboy feature, while Brian Alexander's piece on Sex Surrogates was originally published on [...] and is as flat and truncated as most of the writing on that site. Rachel Swan's piece, originally from the East Bay Express, is a solid look at the condom industry and is pretty much business journalism that just happens to be about a sexual topic.

For me the most successful pieces are those that combine a strong personal voice with a topic that is unexpected and difficult. In these, the standouts are Mollena Williams' brilliantly provocative examination of racially focused S/M, Betty Dodson's "Sexual Outlaw", which tracks her quest for self and honesty amidst shifting identities and expectations, and Kirk Read's charming appreciation of the off-kilter dignity of one sex worker's fetishy john.

All in all, this is an apt snapshot of were we are today: abused, confused, and yet just as often amused by the mysteries of desire. The dead spots are few and the pleasures many.

Rachel Kramer Brussel has put together a fantastic assortment of sexual essays. There are many different topics these essays delve into: from condoms to texting, homosexuality to swinging, BDSM to affairs. These topics come from intellectual writers who deliver information while captivating the reader. Most of the essays are not so much sexually exciting as they are learning experiences. But don't get me wrong, there is plenty of spice to keep you reading if the sexuality-related information isn't enough for you.

I look forward to next year's collection, and I will continue to reccommend the 2010 edition to friends and family.

The truth is, I almost never read Sex books, not because I'm uninterested in the subject, but because I can rarely find any that add to my knowledge or make me feel included or even hold my interest without being frustratingly PC or obviously agenda-driven. More often than not, I start one and give up about halfway through, wondering if I should try writing my own book.

Editirx Rachel Kramer Bussel's new collection "Best Sex Writing 2010" has only increased my desire to write for such a volume, but not for the above reasons. Far from leaving me feeling disinterested/disenfranchised regarding sex, the 25 essays in this volume have me feeling more included and inspired than I've felt in a long time.

Subject-wise, the book is all over the place, but in a wonderful way. If there was a left-field way to think about sex, Miss Bussell seems to have found someone to do. Once we get past the PC, hyper-academic hokum, human sex is amazingly diverse; part kaleidoscope, part rorshach test, unpredictable and endlessly fascinating. "BSW'10"'s contributors reflect this fact, tackling subjects as mechanical and (seemingly) mundane as condom manufacture and marketing, as personal as a wife's plans for an extramarital affair, as potentially explosive as BDSM "race" play, as controversial as teen "sexting". Bussel's contributors never let us get too comfortable with them or ourselves, pushing and pulling us past one fun house mirror after another, always wondering if we'll see ourselves in the next one.

What thrilled me most is how well men are represented in the book. One of the unfortunate assumptions of our society is that men are incapable (or unwilling) to speak/write thoughtfully about sex, the male voice relegated to the pages of "Lad's Mags" and Comedy Central standup specials. "BSW'10" features several male-authored essays that explode this myth (at least a little). From a gay escort's loving description of a fetish session, a straight man's pean to the female bush, to a man's love for sexual wordplay, the male contributors to the book helped ease my personal vagina-envy...for a little while anyway.

What I'm trying to say is that "Best Sex Writing 2010" is the kind of book that makes me want to dust off my composition book and try to write something of my own good enough for the 2011 edition...Which I'll be looking forward to even if I can't be in it myself.

"Best Sex Writing 2010" should be required reading for everyone over the age of 18. The 25 essays in this non-fiction volume take a wide-ranging, fascinating and informative view of many aspects of human sexuality. This book is practically un-put-down-able! You may not agree with all the perspectives in these essays, but you will learn from them.

In "The Girl Who Only Sometimes Said No," Diana Joseph and her thirteen-year-old son, and she explores her feelings when he labels a female classmate "a slut." "Secrets of the Phallus" by Jesse Bering is one evolutionary biologist's perspective on why the human penis is shaped like it is. (Did you know human men have the largest penis size, relative to the size of their bodies, than any other animal?) Johanna Gohmann's "The Vagina Dialogues" examines the cosmetic vaginal surgery industry. "Sex Laws That Can Really Screw You" by Ellen Friedrichs exposes some of the absurdities, and some downright frightening facts, about the state of American sex laws. "What Really Turns Men On" by John DeVore is a wonderfully heartfelt essay singing the praises of women with curves. This one may actually have been my favorite.

"It's a Shame About Ray" by Kirk Read has a sex worker walking away disappointed he couldn't do more to enjoy the full glory of a client's quirky sexuality. In "BDSM and Playing with Race," Mollena Williams boldly lets her politically incorrect fantasies out to play. "Remembering Pubic Hair" by Paul Krassner waxes nostalgic (no pun intended) about the days before porn-star-style shaved labia became the norm for women. In "Sexual Outlaw," the always-entertaining Betty Dobson describes the 1980s lesbian S/M scene. In "Go Thin or Bust," Rachel Swan explores the world's thinnest condoms. " 'Sex Surrogates' Put Personal Touch on Therapy" by Brian Alexander explains the merits of a very useful, but misunderstood, service. Judith Levine's contribution, "What's the Matter with Teen Sexting?" debunks the alleged "dangers" of sexually charged text messages. In "The Anatomy of an Affair," Michelle Perrot longs for the sex she no longer gets from her marriage. "The Portal" by Janet Hardy is a soliloquy on cunts.

"Bite Me! (Or Don't)" by Christine Seifert is the "vampire essay." It looks at "abstinence porn" through the lens of "Twilight" in its literary incarnation. Should you ever need an excuse to read Stephanie Meyer's books in your book club, this essay proves the books have much for thinking women and men to discuss.

"Hot. Digital. Sexual. Underground." by David Black is a report on the current state of swinging. "Loving Lesbians" by William Georgiades describes the catch-22 of a man who's attracted to women who, by definition, aren't attracted to him. Chris Hall's "Lust and Lechery in Eight Pages" relates the history of the Tijuana Bibles, an early 20th century porn format. "The Trouble With Safe Sex" by Seth Michael Donksy is indeed troubling, examining the rise of HIV and STIs thirty years into the AIDS era. "Piece of Ass" by Monica Shores is a bad-sex story about a threesome ... well, a foursome if you count the plastic vulva sex toy. "The Future of Sex Ed" by Violet Blue is an excellent, realistic set of recommendations for the Obama administration to improve the nation's sexual education.

In "A Cunning Linguist," John Thursday plays with his words. "SWL(actacting) Female Seeks Sex with No Strings Attached" by Rachel Sarah describes a single mom's good experience with a date who accepted her as a woman and as a mother. "Toward a Performance Model of Sex" by Thomas MacAuley Millar, is a scholarly but important essay about how sexual violence could be reduced by our cultural attitudes. Finally, "The Client Voyeur" by Debauchette repeats the theme of the sex worker whose client leaves her wanting more, but this time from a female perspective.

This book was a revelation, not so much for its subject matter, as for the discovery that I could find between the soft covers of a paperback such a rich treasure of fantastic writing on one of my favorite subjects - sex.

I know Rachel Kramer Bussel's work through saucy, HOT erotica anthologies, but Best Sex Writing 2010 was the first of her non fiction collections I have read. I have to admit, I turned that first page with a little trepidation - I love fiction, I love getting lost in the excitement and endless possibilities of erotica, but in picking up this book, in turning that first page, I had my shields up. This wasn't fiction - this was facts, and personal essays that examined lives and livelihoods, expectations, personal kinks and all the emotional, physical and social complexities inherent in the often shrouded conversation of (shhhh!) sex. And you know what? I squirmed, but I also laughed, and I saw through the words of the authors, worlds of heartfelt, experienced passion, drive and reflection.

I love the balance Rachel achieved in this collection. Some of the subjects, like Seth Michael Donsky's "The Trouble with Safe Sex" are thought-provoking and serious, while John Thursday's "A Cunning Linguist" tickles its way through sexual vocabulary.

Rachel has arranged the essays so that some of the heavier ones are bracketed by lighter, more playful fare. This was the case with the essay bracket of Kirk Read's "It's a Shame About Ray" a light-hearted account of a transvestite escort and an unusual client request, followed by the essay that has stayed with me for days, Mollena Williams' raw, unashamed examination of race role-play in "BDSM and Playing with Race," and then finished with something lighter, the chuckle after the weight, Paul Krassner's "Remembering Pubic Hair".

This book has something for everyone. From lesbian love to Tijuana Bibles, this collection of sexy essays is a must read!

"Best Sex Writing 2010", edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel, is a collection of twenty-five essays from a variety of writers who can be considered experts in their fields. Journalists, sex workers, and educators; men and women; straight and gay, these contributors address many different aspects of human sexuality and touch upon fetishes and practices that many would not consider to be mainstream.

When this book fell into my hands, I wasn't really sure what to expect. I usually prefer fiction over expository writing, so the thought of wading through twenty-five essays felt a little daunting to me. Honestly, I shouldn't have worried. I found this to be a surprisingly enjoyable and definitely intriguing read. Each of the contributors to this volume has such an individual voice and the topics are so widely varied that the book stayed fresh and interesting from beginning to end. And while I cannot and will not profess to have enjoyed each essay equally, I believe that as a whole the book is very well done.

The authors of these essays write with a comfortable and casual yet knowledgeable tone that make the subjects as non-threatening as possible. They show wit, humor, and understanding, and there is no doubt that they know their topics. Subjects that might be considered taboo or even threatening to many people are brought into the spotlight, examined, and discussed frankly and insightfully.

In her introduction to the book, Ms. Bussel says that if there is a theme to this collection, it would be "sexual outlaws." She encourages us to look at these essays, embrace our inner rebel, look at sex with a fresh perspective, and perhaps even question what passes for the "norms" of today's society. We frequently fear what we do not understand. This volume attempts to remedy that situation. It advocates that sex is not to be looked upon with trepidation but rather embraced in its many forms.

Perhaps after reading this you're not going to want to go out and participate in the swinging scene or indulge in BDSM and humiliation, but you will have a little bit more of an understanding of the diversity of the human experience. And that makes "Best Sex Writing 2010" more than worth the read.

Rachel Kramer Bussel plays skillful host to a carefully curated set of essays that illustrate what sex in America means today. In particular I loved the story detailing Mollena Williams' experiments with race play inside the BDSM community. Rachel really knows how to pick out stories unlike any you've ever read before, that's for sure. 2010 is notable for the honesty with which authors discuss their personal reflections, ranging from commentary on nuanced personal preferences (John DeVore) to defense of one's personal sexual liberties in life (Diana Joseph).

Not all stories relate to the author's direct intimate experiences however. Some of my other favorites concern how sexual ideas have changed over recent history. For example, Rachel Swan covers how condom manufacturing technology has evolved to produce thinner and thinner condoms. Paul Krassner writes a piquant note on how society has moved away from pubic hair. Most frighteningly, Ellen Friedrichs covers how drastically sex laws have tightened in this country and how that can have life-damaging effects on inadvertent offenders.

Best Sex Writing 2010 left me thinking, laughing, and looking forward to next year's installment. Can't wait to see what you guys come up with next!

Rachel Kramer Bussel has done it again with her creation of Best Sex Writing 2010. While I've enjoyed BSW 2008 and 2009, this is probably my favorite of the series. With essays that flip all of your pre-conceived notions on their head, this books is one I grabbed and couldn't put down. BDSM and Playing with Race by Mollena Williams challenges beliefs of kink, sex and race/ism, while Loving Lesbians by William Georgiades made me really rethink my own feelings on many facets of sexual orientation.

Most essay compilations bat about 75% for any given reader, but this one bats about 100. I was really impressed with the quality of the selected essays, and the diversity of topics along the spectrum of sexuality that were covered in this collection. I really couldn't put it down from the beginning to the very last page Highly recommended for anyone interested in the topic of sexuality, and looking to expand their mindsets and horizons.

Rachel Kramer Bussel has once again put together a collection of interesting, sometimes eye-opening, essays in the latest edition of her Best Sex Writing series. I like to think that there is not a lot that surprises me, but a few of these pieces had me thinking about things I had never considered before. Like "BDSM and Playing With Race." Hearing about racial slave play was nothing new, but the reactions faced by the author were most definitely a surprise. It was interesting to find just where some members of the kink community draw that line. And I have to admit that due to a fascination with fetishes that don't actually involve the act of sex, "It's a Shame About Ray" was an engrossing read. Plus there were a few pieces, like "The Girl Who Only Sometimes Said No" and "The Anatomy of an Affair," that I identified with to some extent. A couple of pieces were a bit dry and definitely more journalism-minded, but they were still fairly interesting. There wasn't anything that made me want to quit reading and put the collection down, or skip over it to the next entry. From alternative lifestyles to sex education and sex laws to the history of Tijuana bibles, there is definitely something here for everyone.

It's not a secret that I love Rachel Kramer Bussel's work. Amazingly prolific, Rachel edits (nay, distills) today's best writing about sex (be it erotica or articles on sexuality and relationships). This collection is no different. I find the Best Sex Writing books (for the past three years +) to encompass a wide range of subjects, all fascinating.

Some issues get a bit out there -- kudos to the amazingly brave Mollena Williams for her "BDSM and Playing with Race" -- and some reflective (Paul Krassner's "Remembering Pubic Hair"), but all worth reading. The collection doesn't seem to have a cohesive theme, other than selections that include sex-based topics. All previously published, some have, as one reviewer pointed out, the stamp of their previous publisher (all permissions noted on the last page). That can make the book feel a bit chaotic but it didn't bother me. I read from beginning to end without issue (or pause).

Personal favorites explore their themes in depth, such as Rachel Swan's "Go Thin or Bust: How Berkeley's Mayer Laboratories Won the Battle of the Thin Condoms," Thomas MacAuley Millar's "Toward a Performance Model of Sex," and Ellen Friedrichs' "Sex Laws That Can Really Screw You."

Don't pick up this book looking for erotica or you will be disappointed. The cover may lead you to believe there's intense sexiness inside, and while there's intensity and sexuality, it's a more scholarly approach. Definitely worth the price of purchase, many times over.