Better Single Than Sorry: A No-Regrets Guide to Loving Yourself and Never Settling (Hardcover)

~ (Author)
Key Phrases: online dating, Dennie Hughes, Jenn Berman, The Bachelorette (more...)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Schefft, who famously turned down two marriage proposals on national TV, would seem the perfect source for a book on finding inner happiness and self-sufficiency without a man; unfortunately, the former star of TV's The Bachelorette has a positive message and little else. Instead of providing juicy behind-the-scenes stories from her two seasons on TV, Schefft illustrates her message with anecdotes from a number of average women, a technique she leans on so often that these real-life tales start running together. Lists of questionable utility and appeal are provided throughout, such as "50 Reasons Why It's Great to Be Single" ("You still have an opportunity to hook up with Justin Timberlake if he suddenly knocked on your door"); ditto in-book quizzes and activities. Familiar lessons like "Don't Be a Doormat" and the grass isn't always greener lack fresh perspective, and the text can be frustratingly repetitive ("Chapter 4: Tell Mom-and Everyone Else-to %$#* Off" doesn't preclude sections in Chapter 8 on "Parental Consent" and the "Dutiful Daughter"). Though she provides an occasional surprise-a helpful look at the distinction between playing hard to get and being hard to get, for example-Scheff's advice is largely stale, providing more comfort than constructive ideas.
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Product Description

Let's be honest. No woman really wants to be alone for the rest of her life. But does being alone mean you're doomed to be miserable forever? Definitely not! And does being single have to equal lonely? No way! You can have the best time of your life when you're single, but you wouldn't know that from our relationship obsessed society, where celebrity magazines devote the majority of their content to who's dating whom and the wedding industry is a $100-billion business. Yet more than a third of marriages end in divorce, and countless other couples languish in unions that shouldn't have happened in the first place.

Don't become a statistic—love yourself and never settle!

Jen Schefft knows that better than almost anyone. In 2003, she got engaged in front of millions of people on television's The Bachelor, only to see it end nine months later when the relationship just wasn't right anymore. A year later, she turned down an engagement on The Bachelorette, and the backlash was relentless. She was labeled a "spinster" by a celebrity magazine, and a noted national talk-show host remarked that she would be "a bachelorette for the rest of her life."

This is a terrible message to send to the millions of sensational single women out there, and in Better Single Than Sorry Schefft makes it her mission to let women know that it's better to be single than to be in a relationship that doesn't make you happy. With testimonials from women of all ages—single, married, in committed relationships, with children (even single moms) and without—this book tells you how to let go of your fear of being alone and how to love yourself and never settle for a relationship that is anything less than you deserve.

Written in a conversational style, as if talking with your best friend, Schefft helps you navigate the pressures of a culture that places an unhealthy importance on being in a relationship and shows you how to find happiness in work, home, and the simple pleasures of everyday life. Above all, she shows you how it's far, far better to be single than sorry. Being single is a time to have fun, learn new things, grow, and blossom—not a time to feel desperate or depressed, so cherish it!

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 288 pages
• Publisher: William Morrow; 1 edition (January 23, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0061228079
• ISBN-13: 978-0061228070
• Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.8 x 1.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (24 customer reviews)
• Amazon.com Sales Rank: #562,026 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

14 of 15 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Choose a Position, March 3, 2007

By	Janice Ruiz "Michelle" (Chicago) - See all my reviews (REAL NAME)

This book was not good. Plain and simple. I read it because I saw Jen on TV, probably like everyone else who read it. The problem is Jen is very hypocritical and contradictive. She says be yourself and don't play games then tells women to withold sex for power. Yeah, no game there. She says she's not into money, yet she drops the profession of guys for no reason, like "Investment banker Bob"-or something. Then she tells a story about Bob that has NOTHING to do with his job. What's the point? Are we supposed to believe her more because Bob is an investment banker or be impressed? Sounds like she's into money to me.

I encourage any woman considering this book, or who has read it, to read "God is a Woman: Dating Disasters." It's hilarious and has really good advice. Amazon shopper "Nice Girl" writes a very thorough review of "Better Single Than Sorry" and "God is a Woman" on the "God is a Woman" page. She can't repeat the same review in two places, but you should go to the other book's page and read her review of both books. It's really good.

Jen's book is a pass. Save your money and put it toward a manicure. You'll feel better than you will reading this and have something to show for it.

10 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars REFRESHING!!!!, May 13, 2007

By	catwoman "Seminary Bookworm" (berkeley, CA) - See all my reviews

I read this book at Barnes and Noble on a study break and I will admit that I found it very refreshing!! Why? too many books about being single seem to focus on some aspect of trying to fetch a guy by improving your looks, by flirting better, by having fewer standards, by networking more, etc. While some of those principles are not always completely bad, they focus on life being better with having the ideal mate in your life (instead of learning how to manage or enjoy life). And then other times, they are outright anti-feminist with principles of encouraging submissiveness, a lack of communication and pretending to be something that you are not which is damaging to BOTH sexes, not just women.

This book I think gets it RIGHT. Jen Schefft talks about ENJOYING the single life, about NOT SETTLING, about not falling into the peer pressure when friends or parents want you to be with someone. I think that this is downright refreshing in contrast to other books on single life. More books should be like this! They should not encourage women to be any less than who they truly are, and changing something about yourself should be because YOU want to do it, not because you want to get someone's attention. This seems to have a slef help twist on a feminist perspective.

Other books that I think that people who might be interested in this book might benefit from are: The Meaning of Wife, Bachelor Girl, Feminine Mystique, A Room of Ones Own.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:

2.0 out of 5 stars Sorry I Read This, January 2, 2009

By	The Literaturette (Chicago) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Better Single Than Sorry: A No-Regrets Guide to Loving Yourself and Never Settling (Hardcover)

This book was a waste of time for me to read.

Like most, "yay rah single girl" books, it operates on the FALSE assumption that single women in their twenties and early 30's have amazing, complete lives.

Life isn't Sex and the City and a lot of single girls (past college age) don't have a huge gaggle of single girlfriends to hit the town with every weekend. Most of us aren't yet settled into our careers and our friends have moved all over the place to pursue careers, grad school...etc.

It's hard to just "love yourself and your life while you wait for Mr. Right" while your life is so full of uncertainties. Books written for single women always assume that you are awesome and have this great career and group of wonderful, supportive friends. That's just not the case for so many single women out there.

Unless you have a great job, live in a fun city, have a group of amazing girl-friends, and have no kids, this book has nothing to offer.